HI Beansbeans,

Congratulations to you and your family. That is great news that they took bubs off the ventilator. hopefully bubs will stay off. I assume the little one is now on CPAP?

My bubs was 10 weeks early and got home in 6 1/2 weeks. Then returned for a heart operation at 12 weeks. From my experience I know I really needed the support of family and friends once i got home from hospital. The reality of it really hit me then. In hospital I think i was still in shock and held it together as my DH was often in tears and had trouble explaining what was going on. There were two 27 weekers in our NICU room and they were both home around there due date.

My MIL gave us cab and food money which was fantastic. A couple of things that helped me that you could suggest or get for her - I carried around a little book of photo's with me, it helped when expressing to look at DD, even if if did make me cry.
- Also, a friend came in with a great camera when DD was a week old and took some great photo's that we treasure when we had DD out for only our 3rd kangaroo cuddle. CPAP headgear and all. So cute!
- Getting a diary for SIL to write all the milestones. The are so important and a reminder of how far the little ones come, eg decreased oxygen for CPAP, off CPAP, weight gain (or not), increases in EBM via NGT, first breast contact etc. I even wrote down how much i was expressing as i was so afraid my supply would not increase (i am slightly OCD!!!)

As the weeks progress, people stop contacting as often and then it gets more lonely. So lots of phone calls, offers of visits for lunch etc if possible, and texts. Just knowing that people would be thinking of us helped the long days. Text messages were good as i was not always up for talking and then I still had contact.

I had some well meaning but thoughtless friends who said things like "At least you get a full night sleep" - so i would have to explain how often i would have to express and how sad it was to do at 3am at home with no baby. They did not have kids though.

All the best for your SIL and brother's journey. Keep us posted.