Sadly my strongest memory is the absolute pain of not being able to hold my baby for the first week of his life. It felt like torture. There he is in a little plastic box and you can't have him! I remember every time I walked past the NICU unit with Haz when he was born I would just have to pick him up to prove to myself I could.
I have so many negative strong memories, everything still feels too fresh one year on. But a good memory was seeing DH learning how to change her nappy in the first few days while in NICU, under lights and on CPAP. His hands looked soooo huge lifting up our little DD, and he was shaking and scared about hurting her. HE was so in love already and it was beautiful. The first kangaroo cuddle when DD was 2 days old was so overwhelming, then I had to wait again for a few days so heartwrenching as well.
I don't think I will ever escape CPAP, we are still battling it now and it is still a horrible thing to deal with
Yes I too remember running in to see the weight gain, Matilda had to be a minimum of 4kgs to undergo surgery and until the surgery was complete we could not go home, so to see those gains was a mixture of feeling, 1. closer to home 2. closer to surgery
Our NICU CPAP didn't bother me so much because at least you could still see most of their face, I've seen some where the snorkel is in front of them and it covers the whole face
Waiting to hold Brendan was torture, he was 5 days old when I got a 5 min cuddle while they changed his bedding in the humidicrib. With Tristan he was placed on my chest at birth, absolutely beautiful moment, even though short lived (he needed to be intubated).
I also became a pro changing nappies side on in the humidicrib Brendan was in his until about 3 weeks old, even then they didn't really want him out because he was only just 1600gm, they prefer them to be 1800gm.
Ah soo many memories.... the absolute best day was running out that door and putting Brendan in the car for his first car trip.
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