Parenting after Miscarriage or Loss ~ April/May

Michelle, thinking of you lovely :hug: I can't believe you're almost 33 weeks, where did that time go???

Is Lee not posting because she's away? I'm guessing she's still in Adelaide?

Good morning to you all. I'm pleased to see that the sun is shining here this morning for the 1st time in just over 3 weeks. We've had pretty much non stop rain for that whole time. Anyway hopefully the sun will put us all in a better mood ;)

BW sorry that you've had to resign from work but its obviously the best option for you at this time :hug:

Michelle you're in my thoughts constantly hun. Are your parents still visiting or have they gone home? I know this week is going to be a particularly difficult one but please know that I'll be thinking of you and if I didn't have to be at work on Tuesday I'd pop down for another little visit :hug:

Willow how is everyone at your place?

Bek Where are you? I hope you are all ok.

I'm not doing so great yet again :( I'm so sick of my stupid body doing weird things. I poas this morning and of course it was a :BFN: and I really didn't expect it to be any different :( I'm just really hoping I get another bfp before my due date next month. I seem to be struggling more with my December angel more than my March angel and that is really upsetting me. Its like I haven't even really grieved for my March angel as much as I need to and I'm feeling really bad about that. I'm not too sure if that's normal or not but maybe once my edd for next month passes things might be different. I just don't know :(

Sorry to be a downer yet again.

I really hope everyone is ok.

Mako :hug: your feelings are pretty normal hun. I was a complete mess after my first angel, and I only came to terms with it after the EDD. I had lost another angel inbetween the first one and the first EDD and like you, I couldnt morn that loss properly because I was still a mess over the previous loss (which coincedentally was a Dec angel too). When the EDD came, I wrote a message to my little precious love on a balloon and sent it up to the sky. After that I felt better, lighter and felt I could move on and try to make another baby. SOmetimes we need to let go over our feelings of loss of life to be able create a new life. The time and healing will come on its own, just be kind to yourself and know that the universe will bring something special your way, I promise xx

Michelle - sweety thinking of you and hoping you have something special planned with O for his birthday :hug:

Jayne - thinking of you :hug:

Hope your all having a good Sunday.

DH and I went out for dinner last night, miss A had a sleep over at her grans and is still there, have to clean up and go and pick her up. It was good to go out and eat a whole meal without having a baby attached to the booby or one running to the toilet just as mummy takes her first bite. Having a house full of guests this arvo that are coming to meet Natalya.

A quick BF question - I have expressed but Natalya just wont take the bottle. I have tried two different types (tomee tipee and avent) and she just hates it and gags without taking a suck, so last night she didnt feed until I came back to mums to pick her up. Any tips on getting her to take the bottle - Id like to have this option so I can go out if I need to and not worry if she starving.

Hey Lisa - I had the exact same thing with Claudia. She just REFUSED to take a bottle, I tried everything but in the end she just didn't like it. When Jess was in hospital having her tonsils out I had expressed for her & I was literally down the road from home, so I left Alan with a bottle with a NUK teat on it & she did take that bottle overnight - but after that it was a failure again. I tried expressing when she was closer to 12 months & letting her hold the bottle - still no deal. In the end I just gave up. I only desperately needed her to take the bottle whilst Jess was in hossy, so it didn't really end up being a major issue. When she did go onto cows milk, I didn't even bother with a bottle I just bought her those Nuby spout thingy's & they worked ok. I'm sorry I'm no further help.

MAKO _ I'm so sorry you're not having the best time of it again. I really am. I wish there was some crystal ball I could look in for you & tell you that you will be holding a bundle of joy in whatever month & that all will be grand. How is DH? What does he think? Your OB didn't shed much light either did he? I guess first things first & you need to get your cycle back into full swing.

ME _ Well I'm having a bad day again today. Sick to my tummy, can't eat anything, can't even look at a glass of water to swallow my multi-vitamin. I literally feel as if at any moment I'll be running for the loo. Wouldn't it just be freaking bl00dy hilarious if the Dr says to me 'Congratulations, you're pregnant'. I am laughing hysterically at the very thought. hahahahah I'm back in the 'shocked' phase, last night I morphed to 'angry' & today I'm back to 'shocked'. I have started making notes & plans though. That's about all I can say in this thread....

SPRING _ I'm just bout to PM you.

Love Jayne

Jayne: Hun, it cuts babe and the waiting is the worst. I really hope thisis all just a terrible mix up.

Mako: :comfort: EDD's are bloody tough, I admire how you are going through such pain with such grace.

Lisa: I've never tried B man on a bottle, I give him EBM from a sippy cup. Worth a try if N isn't a fan of the bottle.

Well I'm in a fowl mood. I think I've broken my toe, DS is being a brat, dh has scratched his cornea and ended up in the Army hossy this morning. He has really bad photophobia and can't even open his eyes. So he's zonked out on painkillers and eye drops and he is going in for a major knee op on Wed which involves bone scraping and tendon cutting. Add to that our new neigbours decided to party on until 1.30am and you'll understand why I'm not so happy today. Screw Jenny Craig, I'm taking the boys to Pizza hut for tea. Whaaaa whaaaa whaaaa!!!!

ETA oh and I got both boys to sleep and just laid down myself and got a txt which woke me. Double whaaa whaaa whaaa

SPRING _ Oh my goodness, it's not raining it's freaking pouring at your place!! I hate those days, I really, really, really hope that tomorrow is much better. Just think to yourself 'today is a brand new day'. This is my mantra at the moment. I really hope you can doze a bit until the wee ones wake up & pizza hut is going to be great! You deserve a treat! xx

Hello my lovelies,

Just got back today from 10 days in Adelaide - sorry I've not been able to post, or catch up on everyone. Quick read of facebook and emails - and Michelle, so glad you love the teddies, I think they are so cute too, I hope your little ones love them.

Also, Michelle - wanted to say, having spent ten days with "two world's colliding" - i.e. staying with DH1's family, with DH2 and all the four kiddies - you know what - it was okay, it really was - this has been such a help to me with my grief journey for DH1 - it was kind of a 'full circle' type feeling - and I found comfort being in DH1's family home, haven't been for 5 years. So, we shall see where to from here.......... Michelle, this is me gently reminding you that in time thing will get better again for you, it's a LONG journey, and I'm sure you are doing a much 'better job' of it than I did, hang in there darling girl - not a day goes by I don't think of you of refer something in my mind to you. Holding your hand from afar as George continues to grow, I can imagine how hard things must be getting towards the end of your pregnancy; oh hon, if only things were different, but they are'nt - somehow everything will be okay, because it has to be xoxoxoxo

Hi ladies - so sorry I'm not up for personals - barely keeping my eyes open - got the Tiger red eye out of Adelaide back to Hobart and had to be up at 5am - just not my time of day, and trying to unpack, catch up with the toddler and babe is a challenge!!! But I promise I'll be back in more now - I think there will start being more good news in our group, can feel it in my water !

By the way - when are we all off to Tahita???

Lee xox

Lee - Glad to hear all went well in Adelaide.. you sound fantastic and I'm glad that you've overcome another 'milestone' of sorts. Hugs.

Jayne - Hun, I don't even know what else to say.. I'm sure the way you're feeling today is just your body's way of dealing with everything.. don't start letting yourself think any more of it.. you've got enough on your plate right now!!! Good on you for starting notes and plans!!

Spring - Hugs.. what a rough day and good on you for going to get take out tonight.. you absolutely deserve the treat!!

Lisa - Wish I could help but Luke took the bottle no problems at all so don't really know what to suggest. Good luck!

Mako - Oh hun, don't be too hard on yourself, it's such a rough journey that you're on atm and coming up to your angels EDD is incredibly tough. I was feeling EXACTLY the same way... it's just not fair... and I think it's only natural to be mourning your December angel more at this stage.. again, I was the same with my August angel (compared to my Jan angel) and ended up getting this BFP only a few weeks before my August angels EDD. It was a very difficult time for me too and I'm praying that you get your BFP soon too hun but try not to put too much pressure on yourself either... it's definitely not going to help. I wish there was more I could say or do. Massive hugs and know that we're all here so please open up to us as much as you need.. it certainly helps!!!

Michelle - Not a day goes by that I don't think of you too... you're doing so incredibly well and I can't tell you how much I admire your courage and strength (even if you don't feel it yourself right now)!!! We're all here for you. Hugs.

Janie & Lisa - We need to organise a catch up... I just can't do Tuesday mornings or Wednesdays.

BW - Hope you're doing ok.

Hope everyone else is well. AFU - We're pretty good. Just trying to enjoy this pg as much as I can.. as it will definitely be our last!! I have such a huge belly already, it's crazy and all the comments have been getting to me a little bit but I also love it... it's so wonderful!! LOL. Desperately awaiting some good movement though... I hate this stage and can't help but worry just a little. Maybe I should of hired the doppler like I did with Luke.. oh well, not worth it now!! I think I've been feeling a little bit but not enough to put my mind at ease.. and it's still ages until my next OB appointment!!

Kel xxx

Just a quick note - sinus headache - urgh! I had a fantastic weekend away in the company of women. It has been a very healing time, and a nurturing time and it was most definitely the weekend I needed right now at this point in time. I'm feeling so much better about everything. Have to get ready to go to church this evening, so I can't stay long - but thank you to everyone for your thoughts and messages. Resigning has been difficult, but I have a sense of peace about the decision as it is very much what needed to happen... doesn't mean I'm entirely happy with the way the school has treated me, but time to move on from that one!

BW

BW: it is so nice to hear you positive. One thing I've learned is that sometimes the worst situations open doors we otherwise may have ignored. I'm glad you had such a good retreat.

Lee: I'm really happy your time away with DH1's family was healing. You guys deserve so much happiness.

Kel: wow look at your ticker girl. I never got movement until
closer to 20 weeks with any of my boys. Are you going to find out the gender?

Well today has been horrid. Nuf said.

Lv Spring

ps Freya haven't seen you in here for a while. Miss you girl,

Spring: Sorry it's not been a good day my love. :comfort:

I am here just to give my love to beautiful Michelle... :hug:

& Jayne... Please know you are constantly in my thoughts. :hug:

Oh Spring, what a crapola few days for you hun :( Hope tomorrow is better! Good on you for sticking it to Jenny Craig :rofl:

Jayne, thinking and thinking of you my love

Michelle, I am always here, and you are always in my thoughts :hug:

Mako, sorry you're having a tough time right now, lots of hugs for you too

Better go lovelies, DS1 needs to be taken to bed. He is a sick boy, and his sleep has been all over the place - he slept from 5-7.30 tonight, hence the late hour now! He's currently running around hyped up on panadol :lol: At least it brought his temp down, now I am just hoping for no croup!!! DS2 is an absolute ANGEL, so beautiful and cute, with lovely smiles and talking (cooing!) now. I am hopelessly in love :D. Feeding is just trudging along ATM, good days and not so good days *shrug* We'll get there :)

xoxo

Just checking to see how Nicholas is this morning Janie???

Oh thank you Jayney :hug: I've been thinking of you lots darl, hope tomorrow comes Q-U-I-C-K-L-Y. He had another very disrupted night, but again, is bright as a button during the day! He is extra snotty *blergh* and it is now green *double blergh* as well as having a hacking cough. No croup tho!!! He just told me (while crying) that his hand and arm felt 'fuzzy'....no idea what that is??? Just keeping an eye on him. Checked his temp cos he felt hot and it was 38.8 in one ear and 36.9 in the other WTF? I checked both ears three times too, cos I thought that seemed odd? He tells me he doesn't have a sore ear, so I've got no idea.

Lee, meant to say, awesome to see you back!!!!! Glad you had a nice time, and that your trip was somewhat healing :hug:

Janie I hope N is feeling better soon. We also have lots of snot here atm too and its so grose. I'm not sure who is worse though, me or S. Anyway I hope you manage a better night sleep tonight. How is he now? Has he stopped complaining of a sore arm?

Jayne I'm thinking of you too hunny. I also hope tomorrow arrives quickly for you :hug:

Michelle I'm thinking of you too lovely. I can't even begin to imagine how tomorrow is going to be for you. I do hope Oscar has an enjoyable 3rd birthday and I'll be thinking of you on your Wedding Anniversary :hug:

Thanks to you all once again for letting me know I'm "normal" (if thats true lol).
Today has been an emotional day. My best friend found out that her IVF cycle wasn't successful and that they need to start all over again( her DS is 1 month younger than Sage and she did 1 FET this cycle with her only frosty that survived the thawing process). I'm so sad that it didn't work out for her :( I wish this ttc journey was so mach easier for all of us and it breaks my heart knowing all the struggles we have to go through to either start our families or add to them :(

Mmmmm, just been posting to a mum who is having trouble with breastfeeding because of a thyroid condition that has appeared. I didn't know much about it, except that it can affect breastfeeding, so I went to do a little bit of reading. Now I'm wondering if that was the problem with my pregnancy? Both thyroid conditions can cause IUGR. They can also affect milk supply. Mind you, it seems weird, if you looked at potential symptoms, it would look like hyperthyroidism during my pg, but hypo afterwards. I lost weight in my first and third trimesters, and for some weeks afterwards, but then very quickly start piling it on. Who knows, maybe it's nothing to do with it, maybe I'm just looking for an excuse why I'm getting fat :rofl: Had my BT last week for all those clotting things, hoping to get the results soon to see if that shows anything!

Sorry to ramble on, it probably doesn't make any sense! I just needed somewhere to get it out, thanks for reading :)

Michelle, thinking of you, and holding you and the kiddies close in my heart.

Jayne, thinking of you lovely :hug:

Spring, how is your toe?

Thanks Mako :) The sore arm went away, who knows? :lol:

Janie - you can get thyroid dysfunction during (and after) pregnancy so it is something that should be considered for you too.

Crud here. Too many tears and all too sad. I just wish it could all be so very different. It isn't, so in the words of Greg I have to suck it up princess :( Hoping I can spend some of the day with a smile for my little man. He doesn't deserve the sad mummy who is currently crying on the lounge.

Thinking of you Michelle :hug: :hug: :hug: and :happybirthday: Oscar.