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Not sure yet hun, probably the middle of the month though, so we should be safe! We might be going for my cousin's 21st :) Don't worry, we might get to see each other twice :dance:
Oh, and my mum will book accomm. for us, prolly in the city or nearby. Our family live NOR, like way North (I think ;))
Janie - I hope you're over there when we're there next... looks like we'll head over in the middle of Sept too, for DH's graduation. So exciting. But don't worry Jayne, we'll definitely be back before you get here!!
Jayne Sage is heaps better now thanks for asking about him ;) He's back to his usual happy self although he has picked up a very very annoying habit of screaching at me all the time :wall:
Sounds like Jess is doing really well with her swimming. You must be so proud of her ;)
How is Claudia doing? I love the conversations that your girls have too lol. Makes me so clucky hearing all these conversations these kids are having with their siblings :)
Kelly I'm glad you had a great time in Perth catching up with your family and friends.
Janie How are you doing hun? How is D coming along? What's N up to these days?
Michelle I'm thinking of you. When is your next appointment with your Midwife/Ob?
Deb Thinking of you too. Have you had any news from your DD1? How is Immy doing?
I had a good talk to my boss yesterday afternoon(she's in the process of hiring another teacher and I had to assess someone yesterday afternoon) anyway she asked me what was happening and how I was doing and everything just kinda blurted out about the latest 2 m/c's and stuff :o Anyway she was very sincere about everything I told her and she did tell me that she and her DH are thinking about ttc again in October so atleast I have been "warned" that she may have another baby sometime soon. I'm pleased she told me that and she hasn't told any of the other girls so I can kinda prepare myself for when the time comes that she does become pregnant if that makes sense.
Hope everyone is having a good weekend.
My DH is away this weekend but he'll be back tomorrow sometime hopefully before our visitors arrive. They only asked if they could come and stay yesterday when DH called them to see if a parcel had arrived and they asked if they could stay tomorrow night as they have an appointment in town early Monday morning. So needless to say I've spent today trying to get this house cleaned up as best as I can without a vacuum cleaner as my Dyson has something wrong with it and thats not good when we have a 2 year old who drops stuff on the floor and a dog who loves being inside lol.
Hi lovelies,
Sorry have been mia, reading but not posting much atm, and to be honest am finding the new forums so SLOW to move around in! Am feeling a bit better, the AD's have kicked in and I'm not so drowsy, I think they are helping and I'm a bit more chilled out. Getting ready to head to Adelaide for a holiday this Wednesday to stay with a DH1's family - I have not been there for 5 years, and I know it's going to be emotional, but I feel I need to "face it", am taking the whole family too, so all 6 of us will be there! May not get online much, but will report back in when I get back.
Am thinking of each and every one of you, especially Michelle.
Love Amanda xo
LEE _ The trip to Adelaide sounds like it's going to be very helpful for you, especially given your recent appt's with your Dr & your diagnosis & the AD's. I'm on Team Amanda for a successful trip! Good luck & wonderful news that the whole crew is going to be joining you.
MAKO _ Sounds like the 'talk' with your boss was a good thing honey. Now she knows where you are coming from & what you have been through, plus she had an opportunity to let you know where she is headed as well. Glad your little man is well again - there is nothing worse! Can we talk you into a trip to Melbourne in Sep??? :D
Just a quick one from me, I'm just about to prepare dinner. I really have to get back onto my WW Wagon as I not only fell off the damn thing, but I think it ran me over while I was down because I just can't seem to pick myself back up again!!! hahaha Alan left last night, so that helps with things as there will be no restaurant dinners or lunches happening & now that Jess has swim club 2 nights per week but that I'm not allowed to stay & watch, I have time to come home & prepare dinner rather than getting take-out on the way home, which was our Monday night thing. So I need to get back to eating healthily again & fast!!! We had a birthday party at Ice Skating this afternoon. OMG Jessica is unreal on ice skates! She needed no assistance whatsoever. As for Claudia, well she wasn't a fan of her 'skeeters' but she did manage 2 laps of the rink. My toes are still thawing out now!
Hope everybody had a great weekend!
Love JS
Mako - Glad to hear DS is better and I also think it's great that you had a good chat to your boss. I know how hard that must of been and I'm very proud of you! Well done!
Jayne - I can't believe how well Jess is doing with her swimming... so fantastic!! And good work with the ice skating.. I used to love ice skating back in the good old days!!
Lee - Good luck with the trip to Adelaide, I also think it will be really good for you, albiet a bit difficult. Hugs.
Michelle - Constantly thinking of you hun and praying that you're hanging in there 'as best as possible'. Please let us know how you're going!
Deb - Thinking of you too hun and hoping you're doing ok!
Lisa & Janie - how are those gorgeous bubs of yours doing??
Hope everyone else is doing ok... thinking of you all.
AFM - Had another OB appointment today.. I can't believe I'm 14 weeks now.. never thought we'd get here!!! It's very exciting and we could of found out the sex today, our OB knows but we resisted, mainly because we've got a date that the baby will be born now (c-section) so we need at least one surprise. Everything is looking absolutely perfect and she was really, really, really happy with the results from the downs testing, so that's good!! It's sooooo weird knowing the date this early but its good as we can start planning everything... when Mum comes over and when we can get back to Perth with bub!!! Anyway enough rambling from me.
Kel xxx
Hi guys,
Lee - good to hear from you, I had been wondering how you have been. Sounds like this trip is coming at a very helpful time for you - I hope you enjoy your stay hun
Jayne - WTG Jess, that is fantastic! You guys must be very proud of her :)
All this talk of being in Perth in Sept - it looks like we may be back living there by Sept! Not sure yet, but DH's work are talking of sending him back soon for another position. it will be good to be back around our families (and where we can get a lot more help with the kids), but we have only just settled in here! I don't really want to go back yet, but we'll see what happens. It is certainly better than Texas which is where they were talking of sending us a while ago!
Kelly - I hope your appointment went well today
mako - glad to hear that you had a chat with your boss hun. Enjoy your visitors :)
Melb girls - the only time I am free (ie - DH will be busy and not wanting me to be out doing stuff with him!) is for a couple of hours from around 11.30 on Fri. We will be staying at a serviced apartment in Brighton, so you guys are welcome to come hang out with us there or somewhere nearby, otherwise I can try and get to to you but would need to drop DH off at Moorabbin first and will then need to be back in 90 mins to pick him up again, plus I tend to get hopelessly lost and freaked out by trams in Melb, so I am not sure if I would even get out anywhere in the time I have! If you guys can't do it I will not be offended at all, I know I am really putting you all out by seeing if you can come to me and I understand how hard it can be to get around Melb, esp with kids. So no worries if we can't make it happen, I can always try to catch up with you another time when we are in Melb :)
Mako hopefully by the time your boss is pg you will be as well so it won't be such a big hurdle to cross over. It's good that you were able to caht so closely with her. Glad to ehar DS is doing better.
Jayne wow on your clever little girl. Swimming and skating! How old is she? My DD tried dancing, gymnastics, swimming and minkey when she was in primary school but due to a hip condition she couldn't continue any of them as it caused her too much pain :(
Lee I hope you manage to enjoy the trip to Adelaide. That is my favourite city after Hobart lol. My sister lived there for a few years after she was married so I had 3 visits over there, the last one was for 5 months as she had a stroke and we stayed with her til she was able to travel back to Hobart to live near family.
I am popping in and trying to catch up but DS1 is a very clingy mummys boy.
hugs
Jude
What is the date again Bun? Happy to come to you if I'm free :)
Janie - I am free tomorrow if that suits you? From around 11.30am. I will PM you my mob no. and will pop back on line later today. We are staying on Bay st in brighton and have just arrived. If you're not free, no worries!
I'm baaaaaaaaack! Finally, after a few months of computer troubles we finally found someone to fix it :cheer: and I don't have to type posts on my iPhone. I'm so glad and promise to be in here more often now.
Promise to keep up with my persies also.
I can't tell you how nice it is to type with all my fingers not just one.
Spring xx
Yay Spring!
Well I thought I should up date a little as I am aware it's been a while & I haven't been around as much. A wise woman told me about 12 months ago that it was going to get a whole lot more stressful than I could imagine. She was right and then some.
So, DD14 is still gone. I have heard nothing from her. She is still insisting I am not given information on her. My heart was broken into so many pieces when she left that I couldn't imagine collecting them all together again. But of course I have! I am a Woman & a Mama & this is a test of my strength of conviction in mothering. I have learned there is more to a Mama than wiping bums, noses, abc's, virtues, etc etc. There is having your heart broken so incredibly that it feels close to death, then realising that you can't die as there are others to live for. So I can thank her for that. In the depth of this I have been able to bathe in the love that I feel for her and for the others - but as you all know there is nothing like the love you have for your first born child. She (or he) teaches about a depth of emotion that we didn't even know we had the capabilities for. When it is threatened it creates a gaping pain that there is no analgesia for. It's been horrific.
However, through any pain there is always beauty - always. My life has taught me that if nothing else. I have watched my other children grapple with the loss of their sister in different ways. DS9 with a lot of masculinity that I haven't seen in him quite like this before. He has stood ferociously beside me, stroked my head, laughed, cried, yelled at the sky and tromped at the ground. DD7 my ever ever empath cried and nurtured and told me I was beautiful, good and amazing. My DD6 - just touched me with her bewilderment, but ability to get on with whatever life thows so long as she has me and her family. Immy spent a week or so looking for DD14 and now she doesn't ask any more...
DD7 moved into her sisters room and I smudged it, redecorated it and sadly packed away my oldest childs belongings, folded them all neatly, sprayed them with my perfume and sent them off so she knew that she was welcome to her things. Keeping of course aside the teddy I had bought her whilst she still gestated inside me, the quilt I sewed her & bits of her I couldnt let go...
Finally he engaged another lawyer - number 4 in 10 months. He wants to settle out of Court - at least that's what the letter of last week said. He also gives his permission for me to relocate... So that's a good thing.. ;)
However he hasn't replied to my offer & Court is scheduled for Monday morning at 9.30am. I am nervous, twitchy and angry that he is such a tosser... :wall:
I spoke to DD14 social worker on Thursday - gorgeous woman & she and I drank coffee and talked for a couple of hours. She still hasn't been given a "reason" for DD14's leaving or her unwillingness to engage with me. Then today I was phoned by the psychologist who DD14 is seeing and he asked me if I would be willing to discuss some stuff with him present and FWOTY. I said I absolutely would be happy. I think it was connected to the fact that DD14 told the Social Worker that FWOTY had told her I was refusing her permission to see her siblings. Ridiculous saying this to DD14 as I have it all in writing that I have offered him & her access to the kids through a contact house. The girls really believe FWOTY is holding DD against her will as her behaviour was so opposite to now before she left. There is a lot of fear for them. For DS it's just anger. He is so angry at his father, angry at his sister. It's saddening. :cry:
Friday was a pearler. Sloppy's 3 year old twins go to kindy at ny kids school. I was phoned and told that FWOTY had dropped her kids to school but after school had gone in... So he showed some descretion. All good. (gotta love small towns!)
I picked my kids up off the bus (they bus the kids from the rainforest up to the park in town to stop dust etc) at the end of the day... Mr Wonderful (FWOTY) picked up Sloppy's twins, cuddling one, holding the hand of the other and then waltzes around the school - sees my 2 DD's says hi... :o By this time someone screeches around to DS to say his Dad's at school talking to his sisters. DS thinks he's stealing them... He runs up to him and then FWOTY tries to hug him - DS tells him to get away from him and he doesn't want to see him or have her kids around him... FWOTY drives off with Sloppy's twins. It made for a great scene at the bus stop.
Who the hell does this????
So today at school I see Sloppy & she literally ran away... :rofl: Gosh it was funny & did I feel just for a nano second omnipotent! :D
The meeting with the psychologist went horrendously - the FWOTY informs me he gave DD14 my affidavit to peruse (obviously irresponsible and outrageous)... I realise that he tells her everything with no "okay filter" in place. I also painfully faced since the meeting above that there is nothing I can do to help my relationship wiht my daughter whilst she is with her father. I have let go completely. It has been unspeakably difficult.
He has moved out of Sloppy's & I believe he's back living with his mate that he moved in with before he rented his own place. This will be completely because the income into the household with him and Sloppy together would be about $350k p/a - this would mean he would likjely get a lesser settlement. So he's done this for the time being until Court is over. He is such a kniving *&^%^&...
Anyway my darlings know this is why I have been so scant. I am truly only just holding it together here. I am walking a very very very thin line of being okay. Stress is outrageous, my blood pressure isnt controlled at the moment, I have lost all my weight that I accumulated with 11 pregnancies (that's the positive!)... I just want you to know I have been here all the time, just unable to articulate my pain in a way that makes any sense. I have felt very very alone.
So Court in Brisbane monday morning at 930am. My gorgeous friend & soul sister whos been with me through my adolescence, men, marriage, births, deaths, divorce and everything in between is coming with me... Kids are organised. I am just a bit stressed... ;) Say some prayers & hold my hands through this latest distress please. xxx :grouphug:
Deb, will be thinking of you as always. :hug: I hope Monday goes as smoothly as possible.
Life here is in a process of upheaval. I've been off work for two weeks, will be off for another week, and in reality probably will not ever return other than to collect the last of my belongings and be formally farewelled. Physically and mentally I just can't do it any more. After going through so much to simply have Sam here, I can't go on giving all that I have to other people's children and having nothing left for him at the end of the day. DH will be returning to full time work and I will be applying for a disability support pension as the state I am in right now is just that bad... and doesn't look like changing any time soon, if ever.
At least I will be free to meet with people during the week again, which will help my mental health return... just not sure if my physical health will ever approach any kind of normal any time soon.
BW
Deb, I think of you often lovely :hug: I'm sorry things are so terrible and trying for you. It sounds as though you are holding together marvelously well, under the circumstances. I'm so glad your lovely friend will be with you on Monday......please know that I'll be thinking of you and sending plenty of positive vibes xoxo
BW :hug:
LANEY!!!!!! Are you there lovely?
Oh Deb you are going through so so much right now. I wish I could make some difference in your world for you. I'll be with you in spirit on Monday and really do hope things work out well for you.
As for your DD she will eventually come to her senses and will realise how silly she is being, but it will obviously be in her own time. I can't begin to imagine how heartbreaking this time is for you or your other beautiful children. Atleast they have their own minds and can see how things are for themselves and especially that they can see FWOTY is acting aswell :shakeshead:
Atleast you are able to relocate when you are ready too aswell. Do you think you'll still move to Melbourne in the future?
Sending you all my love and support :hug:
BW I'm sorry you are having a tough time with work and your illness. I'm sure Samuel is loving having him mummy at home though.
Janie How is Daniel doing? I often think of you and wonder how you're all doing.
Kelly I'm not too sure if I congratulated you on your wonderful Ob appt the other day so Congrats. I'm pleased things are going well for you now ;)
Spring Woohoo on having your computer back. I'd be so lost without mine although I don't do anything too major on it (just BB and FB really) lol.
Lee I hope you are enjoying yourselves in Adelaide.
Hi to everyone. I am thinking of you all too.
Sorry for no more personals. I'm feeling a bit down atm but I'm sure I'll pick myself back up again sometime soon.
Janie, thanks for asking about me. I do pop in to read and see how everyone is doing. I think of all of you often. I just don't feel like I have very much to offer right now. We are almost to "that" point in this pregnancy. I have my appt. on the 14th. Parker and Shelby measured a week behind at my 17 week scans. I am just barely holding it together most days. I just want this little boy to be healthy. Hopefully after the 14th I will be able to relax a tiny bit....
How is Daniel doing? Is his reflux getting any better?
Deb, Michelle, Mako, BW I really hope things start to look up for you soon.