Everyone says they grow up too fast......Am I not enjoying my daughter enough?

[Miss.September]

I think it does make sense yes thanks

How did you cope with the night waking so long? I've given up on the night weaning as that makes it worse, and she still gets the boob but it's incredibly painful now that we're pregnant again. Hubby has moved himself into the spare room coz he can't deal with her wwake ups anymore either. Her own bed she'll rarely use at all. And I'm just now in a state of exhaustion all the time, don't think I have the strength to try night weaning anymore, or keeping her in her bed

We went through stages. DD weaned at 14 months but for some time before that, I realised that a hug would suffice instead of a middle of the night feed. From 8 months old, whenever she would wake, we'd put her in our bed, so we all got some sort of sleep. As she got older, we tried putting her back into her own bed which ended up being numerous times each night, so we stopped. Then I started to sleep on the floor of her room, so when she woke and tried to get up, I could let her know that I was right there, and she would stay in her bed. After a few nights, I'd start to sleep in her room, then after she woke and went back to sleep, I'd go back to my bed, to a few nights later trying to be in my bed all night. It worked for a few days and then we were back to the same original pattern of her coming into our bed. Recently she stayed in her bed all night of her own accord, so we started encouraging her to do it and she has. It's only now that I'm getting a proper sleep at night that I've realised how tired I was. Having her in our bed gave me a restless sleep. She doesn't have a day sleep either, stopped that around the time she was one. I wish there was an easy answer, but in our case, DD sorted it all out herself.

Heaven - I read that blog too, it's a great post.

[OceanPrincess]

I don't think there's anything wrong with you. You're tired, you're frustrated...

FWIW, my DH looks at older kids doing cool things like going snorkelling, going on fun rides, enjoying time with their parents and asks how old they are, then plans when we will be able to do those kind of things.

We took our kids to a trout farm recently and DH loved it. DD was great, DS still a bit little, but my DH is loving having older kids. He interacts better with them, he deals better with them, he handles them better. He can't handle the grizzling - when something is wrong but they can't communicate what and he finds it hard to deal with.

So no, I don't think you're strange at all.

[MummyNaomi]

Well I'm clucky for my upcoming newborn again but I do understand - my DH enjoys DS much more now than he ever has (at just over 2.5). I think though that every age has its pro's and cons - with a energetic toddler there is not as much down time IMO, shopping for instance takes soooooo much time with an inquisitive toddler whereas I found it easy with a little baby who would happily sleep in his pram between feeds, but every baby/child is different. I enjoy outings more as a family though and seeing the world through my toddlers eyes
Dont be so hard on yourself phynna, its impossible to enjoy every moment (and on some days its near impossible to enjoy any moments), and throw in a bit of sleep deprivation and it just makes this parenting gig even more challenging

Have also read that article Heaven, and it make me laugh (and nod)

[phynna]

Heaven thanks for that, was a really helpful read. Especially with how frankly that lady writes too

Arcadia, I'm thinking I'll try again when 2nd trimester energy kicks back in, just too sick in the daytimes and too tooooo exhausted at night to deal with her fights at the moment.

PakRak I've been wondering about giving my girl a queen bed that I have spare, so that I can comfortably do the transition back to her bed again, she has a toddler bed now, but not so good for me to be holding her to sleep to be cramped up in it and half hanging out. Plus Elly's a sprawler so I think it might be a better transition.now have to psyche myself up for it all over again.

Thanks everyone for all your comforts and advices. Guess I'm succumbing to the preg hormones and gettingg all emotional on top of the sleep deprivation and not doing myself too many favours. You've all raised my outlook a lot ,thanks

[sloane]

i think there's something to be said for hindsight too. DS only started sleeping 'well' after he turned 2 - maybe at 26 months. now that we're past the waking stage & he's also happy in his own (king single) bed, the whole NB-toddler seems like it went very quickly. when i was in the midst of 45m-1.5hourly wake ups every night for the first 18 months, it seemed like a hell on earth that may never end

you do need to be in the right headspace for night weaning, i hope when some energy kicks back in you can give it another go. and i def think a bigger bed is a great idea

[krysalyss]

I found that first year so hard. When I look at pics of DS, he was so cute, but I don't miss being there in that first year. As they get older they get easier in some ways and harder in others and you have good and bad days of course. I think being able to enjoy each day and the journey is something we all could probably practice.