Thanks ladies. The thing that upsets me most is it's not a once off. If it were I could just get over it, I think. But it's not, and I dont know how to change it. I'm ashamed to admit it but it's true.
I probably smack him on the hand or the bum at least once a day because nothing else works. He refuses to lie still for a nappy change, he refuses to listen when I ask him not to do things, he deliberately moves form one thing to the next that he KNOWS he's not allowed to do. He has heaps of freedom and heaps of toys but he'd prefer to go around being naughty. I KNOW he understands when I ask him not to, because some days he listens, but more often than not he ignores it or does it more. I know he has very little impulse control and it's not his fault, I know this is normal 2 year old behaviour. I used to care for them for a living FGS! Why can't I have the same patience for my own child as I did for 10 other little people?
It's my issue, and I dont know how to fix it I said I'd never smack unless it was a life threatening situation and now I do it every day. So much for gentle parenting.
It's no wonder he never comes near me when he's upset.
Oh darl this is such a tough age isn't it? I try very hard not to smack Moo but in the last couple of weeks, I have to admit that he's gotten a few on the hand. I feel so terrible afterwards & the guilt just about eats me up. I am so over being belted & kicked during nappy change, not being able to sit down for 5mins without him dragging me off to play etc. I've yelled at him quite a bit lately too which makes me feel just as bad.
Not trying to take away from you but just want you to know that you're not alone in how you feel. Is there any way you can get a few hours by yourself? It sounds like you really need a break
It is nice (not nice to know your feeling the same but you know what I mean) that I'm not alone. I honestly feel some days like I am abusing him Because I yell/ smack him/ make him cry so much.
big as someone else said, a bad parent wouldn't care and wouldn't feel guilty. You are a wonderful mum and I'm sure he is not going to be scarred for life! I know how hard the sleep thing is, although you're doing better than me and persisting with him..I just give up and put DD in our bed and I dread the day when DF says no that really is enough, make her sleep in her own bed...
I yelled at DD just this morning for knocking my cup of tea over, then left her standing in the kitchen crying while I was cleaning up the mess I felt so awful afterwards and it was silly to be upset with her, she didn't mean it and it was an accident..sometimes I think we just react instead of thinking about the reaction first, which I can't imagine is an easy thing to do!
I said I'd never smack unless it was a life threatening situation and now I do it every day. So much for gentle parenting.
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this is such a tough age isn't it? I try very hard not to smack Moo but in the last couple of weeks, I have to admit that he's gotten a few on the hand. I feel so terrible afterwards & the guilt just about eats me up. I am so over being belted & kicked during nappy change, not being able to sit down for 5mins without him dragging me off to play etc. I've yelled at him quite a bit lately too which makes me feel just as bad. 
I felt so awful afterwards and it was silly to be upset with her, she didn't mean it and it was an accident..sometimes I think we just react instead of thinking about the reaction first, which I can't imagine is an easy thing to do! 
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