Alcohol and teenagers what would you/do you do?

[Mother Goose]

Having worked in a Drug and Alcohol Clinic, I take the standpoint of providing my child/ren with the education that I believe should surround alcohol (and drug) consumption. I understand I may not be able to STOP my child/ren from consuming these substances because, let's face it, peer pressure can be pretty damn influential. So I plan to educate about the risks associated with consuming various substances. I will also discuss with them WHY people might like to take those substances and other ways they can achieve the same feelings without having to take that substance.

I will also maintain an open door policy. If they want to try these things then tell me. Let me know they want to use them and when, where they will be etc.

A part of harm minimisation is advising people to consume these substances in a safe environment with people they trust. In line with that, I will encourage DD to consume the substance at home. Once she is 18, I obviously have no issue her with having alcohol outside the home. But before that, I would encourage her to have it at home. If she was wanting to consume illegal substances, I would very strongly encourage her to only consume it at home - where I can keep an eye on her and keep her safe.

Hopefully by giving her education early on, she will make the decision to not buy into the peer pressure associated with these substances. And if she does decide to indulge in alcohol, she will be sensible in her consumption.

MG

[misty]

What Mother Goose said.

We will take the stance my parents took with me. No Alcohol if you are under 18! Having one small glass of Champagne at a wedding if they are 16 or 17, if they ask would be considered on its merits (and my knowledge of the kid) but otherwise it is not something I would condone and certainly not allow social drinking occur with my knowledge.

BUT if my kids are anything like me, they will still drink, so I will educate them about alcohol/drugs as well. And make sure they are aware that if they are in a situation where themselves or a friend are drinking and they are also the driver, they should be calling me at anytime to pick them up instead. I won't be happy about the drinking, but it will go down alot better and I would want them to be safe.

I think parents fall into this trap of thinking "well if they are allowed to drink at home, at least I know where they are and that they aren't doing anything stupid." The truth is however, that that is true when they are drinking at home, but it is the drinking aways from home that is the biggest problem. And they ARE still going to do this regardless of whether they drink at home or not. IYKWIM. You cann't supervise teenagers ALL the time.

[misty]

When it comes to drugs. Education, but also a flat out "will not be tolerated in this household".
I know way too much about drugs to tolerate that one (guess which crowd I hung out with at school - lets just say there was alot of stuff other then school work going on). Know too many people who have suffered serious consequences and death as a result of drug, either indirectly or directly. It is one thing I will be completely strict about.

[Fleur]

I think parents fall into this trap of thinking "well if they are allowed to drink at home, at least I know where they are and that they aren't doing anything stupid." The truth is however, that that is true when they are drinking at home, but it is the drinking aways from home that is the biggest problem. And they ARE still going to do this regardless of whether they drink at home or not. IYKWIM. You cann't supervise teenagers ALL the time.

yup. Learnt that one the hard way.

I was allowed by my mum to drink & smoke, and smoke pot. My friends, who were not allowed, did it all anyway.
We started out with the POV that it would be better to know what they are doing. Gave her half an inch & she took a freakin mile
So the rule in our house is, no alcohol until you're 18.

[MrsFabuloso]

I was allowed by my mum to drink & smoke, and smoke pot. My friends, who were not allowed, did it all anyway.
We started out with the POV that it would be better to know what they are doing. Gave her half an inch & she took a freakin mile
So the rule in our house is, no alcohol until you're 18.

That is my thinking too. My brothers were allowed to smoke cigartettes and then pot in the house/garage by my mother. She turned a blind eye to it all. Dad tried to stop it all, but he was working alot of the time and just wasn't there to watch it all. I am 9 and 10 years younger than my brothers, so when they were 14, I was 4ish and seeing them smoking (only cigarettes at that age) was not a great role model for me. I'm amazed that I grew up never having tried pot or being a smoker. Alcohol wasn't the issue in our house.

[Fleur]

Well, suprisingly (maybe) I am not a big drinker now at all, I did smoke for years but have quit & pot went out the window when I got past my teens.
Having said that , i dont' think it's an argument for my mother's way of doing things, just an indication that a lot of it is inbuilt personality traits. And then how you grow up with it has a big effect on that. She had more problems with my younger sister than with me.

[diannescruffy]

How is this for coincidence. Just picked up DS15 from his mates house, his mate was going to the under16 footy party. One of the mums who picked him up let this boys mum know that there will be alcohol there. His mum bought 3 cans of alcohol for him to take to the party plus the alcohol that will already be provided. This mum also buys her son smokes.

Regards,
Dianne

[MrsFabuloso]

Wow. Dianne, 3+ alcoholic drinks at 15 (ish)?? that's alot of alcohol for a kid at that age (gosh I would be half drunk or more on that amount of alcohol!)

[Sopdet]

I grew up in a very liberal household. When my parents would have a drink before dinner & with dinner, I'd get a VERY watered down version in the same glass (like they'd make a scotch and dry, put a splash into a glass for me and fill it with dry). When I was in high school I could drink at home if I wanted to, no sneaking around getting drunk with friends (couldn't see the point when I could have a drink at home), no going out to clubs/pubs under-age to drink (yes I used to go to clubs/pubs under-age but to see live bands), I could sit at home on a Friday/Saturday night and have a drink or two with dinner.

I am not a big drinker, I don't have to drink all the time, I know my limits, in saying that I do occasionally let loose and get a bit messy.

I will probably bring up my children the way I was, that alcohol isn't something that you have to sneak around and have, if you want one, then ask for one. One thing I've observed, the more you make something taboo the more "intriguing" it is.