I think little babies need their Mums. Breastfeeding and attachment to their primary carer is so significant at this time. I am totally for fathers raising their children too but I think 24 weeks old is a little young for Dad to be doing it full time IMO.
Hi KTee. It really is lovely that your dh wants to take that time to be the primary carer of bubs. I'm curious at the 18 week min pay government thingo, I had presumed I wouldn't get anything other than the baby bonus, is this new legislation coming in perhaps after my baby is born? (sorry I guess that's a whole other thread). My 1st thought reading your post regarding your dh taking the leave is that it would really depend on if you choose to BF or formula feed. Granted you could express and then your dh can still do the feeding but with you working and expressing it would be lots of work for you. Our plan is for me to finish up work at 34 weeks pg and then I've told my employer I am taking 7 months total so I will get about 6 months (26 weeks) with me being the primary carer. I hope not to have to go back to work at all but if I do dh will be looking after bubs on the days that I am not here so I guess it's a similar situation to what you will be doing. If I am still breastfeeding I will express I's say but at this stage I'd only be working around 3 days a week. dh is taking about 2 months off when bubs is born and is using his holidays for that so it will be paid but all of my maternity leave will be unpaid (sadly). hmmmm not sure I've been any help really! I guess I think it would work well, why shouldn't you dh get to care for bubs? just as long as he's doing most of the work and your not going to work full time and then having to come home and do most things there too!
i would look into it a little further - i don't know to be honest if the parental leave scheme can be paid AFTER your normal mat leave entitlements - i am under the impression it has to be taken at the same time....
it's nice that your OH wants to take time off, but it might not be viable if you're BF etc. it's definitely a decision to make much later, when you know how you're going to feel, how your baby is going etc. but definitely check when that parental leave is to be paid! i may be wrong, but check it out hun!
Cherished, just this week legislation was passed that working mothers may be entitled to paid parental leave following the birth of their child (if they've worked a certain amount in the previous 12 months) - it comes into effect from jan 1. it would be in place of baby bonus for those that qualify.
Parental leave (as is offered already) can be taken by EITHER parent.
I think it is a fabulous idea. By 24 (that is almost 6 months old BTW) you will have well established breastfeeding, so that really will not be an issue, it will simply mean you need to speak with your employer about a time and place to pump.
I think it is ace he wants to take some time off to be with bubs too, and yes, selfish of you to say he can't or have objection after you have had that 6 months to bond. Dads need to bond too
don't get me wrong - my concern isn't the time for Dad at home with bub (i think that is a great idea after 6months-ish) - it's more the idea that the PAID parental leave, as passed by the government this week, is being considered as a source of income for that time - the way i read it, it's not going to work like that - i haven't been to work to confirm or anything, but i PERSONALLY read it that it is to be paid for the FIRST 18 weeks, and it's only if the mother returns to work within that time frame that the father (or other mother if that is the case) would be eligible for the payment. if the OP is eligible for 24 weeks pay at half rate, she would be deemed to be the primary care for the full 24 weeks, and the other carer wouldn't be able to be deemed primary carer (or be eligible for that payment) within that time frame.
Hey everyone, thanks for your replies I haven't had a chance to look into it (the scheme) further yet, but I'm pretty certain we couldn't take leave (from my employer & the government) at the same time, because then we'd both be classifying ourselves as the primary carer. I'm also pretty certain the leave can be taken by either parent within the first year of the baby being born, so we shouldn't have any problems starting it at 24 weeks.
Also, a benefit for us is that I only work a few minutes from home, so expressing wouldn't be hard and I usually come home for my lunch hour. Now that I've been thinking about it longer, I reckon if hubby wants that time with bubs to experience what I get to have for those first 24 weeks, it can only be a good thing for them both bonding-wise and for hubby to know what it's like to be the full time parent and me to know what it's like to leave for work every day.
But yeah, we'll think about it more when the time gets nearer I suppose. Thanks!
I think that each parent having a stay at home time for bonding one-on-one time with bub is such a great opportunity if you can do it. It takes a lot of sacrifice and compromise from both parties. It ws always our plan, and was put in the place when Jazz was 18 months old - my partner ceased full-time work and became a SAHM and I went to full-time work and became a working mum. The was a part of me that wanted to stay at home still, I still have days where I feel heartbroken leaving her, and I cry at the though of missing out on things. But then I think, my partner must have felt the same way for the first 18 months. It isn't any easier for the non-birthing partner to leave their child at home and go to work, and so I sucked it up and did it for the sake of my partner and our daughter, and their bond. I am still breastfeeding, although I think its because I was able to stay home for the first 12 months. Once she hit 14 months she had cut down the number of feeds she had each day, and drank more cows milk, so it made it easier and I don't have to express. If I had to express it would have been difficult as I could never really get the hang of it, sometimes I'd get heaps, some days I'd get NOTHING despite being painfully full!
Personally, I think its a great idea. Maybe decide when it comes closer to the time. We had always planned on swapping at 12 months, but she was feeding so much at night that it wasn't feasible without me weaning. I wasn't willing to do that, so we put it back until she was settled (and able to be night weaned).
It can work, but you both have to be able to make it work.
Registered User
I haven't had a chance to look into it (the scheme) further yet, but I'm pretty certain we couldn't take leave (from my employer & the government) at the same time, because then we'd both be classifying ourselves as the primary carer. I'm also pretty certain the leave can be taken by either parent within the first year of the baby being born, so we shouldn't have any problems starting it at 24 weeks.
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks