Today has just been one of those days.

DD (19mths) is going through a real boundary pushing phase at the moment that just makes everything super difficult.

She also says NO to everything - so had said NO to a nappy change this morning and then cracked it when DH tried to make her. Normally we just say "ok then we won't..." do whatever she has said no to and wait for her to change her mind - eg she gets her shoes pretty quickly when we are leaving, if we tell her she will have to stay inside while we go outside for example. Not that we ever would, but you get my technique I hope.

But with her sore bum, we can't afford to let her sit in a pooey nappy as that will just make the situation worse so we have to force her.

DS (10wks) has been pretty cruisey since birth and has been sleeping 7hrs at night, followed by four or five so pretty good. But recently he has started being a bit fussy at feeds and he also only sleeps during the day if he is being bounced in the bouncer. Bit tricky with a high energy toddler to chase around.

While he was having a feed this morning, DH was doing some dishes and DD decided it was time to watch Dora. I knew she had already had some TV today so I said no, at which point she hit DS on the head. Not hard, but she did it knowing she would get a reaction from me (I've been trying to ignore her tantrums).

I told her off immediately and called DH to put her in the naughty corner. I think part of the reason she did it was boredom - so once DS finished his feed, i sat with her and was played with some toys and read some books and she was a lot happier. So I'm a failure because I can't keep my daughter happy and entertained.

Once DS had finished his feed and had some awake time I wrapped him and put him in his cot. He can't sleep in the bouncer forever.

Well he lasted about 2 mins before I went and got him and put him back in the bouncer. DH started bouncing. So now I feel like a failure that he won't sleep during the day unless being bounced and won't self-settle.

Mum and I go to the shops with DS and leave DD with her dad. My normally cruisey baby screams pretty much non-stop while we are there apart from when he has a 20min powernap. Fussed at feeds, didn't want to be held, just grumpy. So we call it a day and head home. Try to give him a feed in the carpark before we go and knock his head on the roof of the car while I'm changing sides. Great mum I am.

Get home make dinner - DD being her usual delightful self getting into everything and causing havoc. 6.45pm we call it and put her to bed at which time she screams and carries on for about an hour before going to sleep. DH and I are taking it in turns to try and settle her... Nothing was working. Eventually she settled.

Meanwhile DS has been getting more and more worked up and we don't know why. Normally at this time of night he feeds, dozes, feeds, is awake, feeds, til about 10pm when he crashes for the night. But he's always happy. Not tonight.

He was just screaming and nothing I was doing was helping.

DH had him for a bit and he's back on the BB now and seems ok.

I just feel like I am being a completely crap mum to both of them. We had thought we'd have a third but after days like today we both just think it's going to be too hard.

DD is so full on, she is all consuming when you are with her and you cannot get anything else done. She fights everything - eating, getting dressed, nappy changes, sleeping, everything.

DS was going great but doesn't sleep well during the day and now it seems
I can't even comfort him when he's distressed. I was in tears before I was so upset that I'm such a bad mum.

What am I doing wrong??