I have done no sleep training. I've lay down with all my kids to get then to sleep. Ds1 has slept through from 13 months and started going to sleep by himself around 3. Dd is completely different. She went to sleep by herself from around 6 months but still wakes up now at 3.5. She's had other issues though with multiple lots of grommets, tonsils and adenoids out etc and this has worked against her. Ds2 is 7 months and will sometimes go to sleep on his own but doesn't sleep through. I wouldn't expect him to sleep through at this stage even if I was sleep training though. So, I think all kids are different.
No sleep training here, not even gentle methods (altho I guess it was our own gentle methods?) So far DS and DD1 learned to stay in bed and go to sleep around the age of 2? (OMG.. I'm forgetting already!!) and slept through the night consistently around 2 1/2 for DS and just over 3 for DD. We've parented to sleep until they were ready, and we have really good 'bed-goers' and sleepers now. I'm holding on to that as I deal with DD2 now and her constant waking for feeds through the night.
As a side note, we co-sleep, and around the age of 15 months we've started them in their own big bed, and they would come in to us after their first waking. We seem to have had natural progressions from self-settling as little babies, to needing help from around 7/8 mths (the girls anyway.. DS fed to sleep for 2 years LOL) which was rocking or cuddling, to sitting with them on the bed and feeding/cuddling to sleep. Then eventually they were old enough to be praised excitedly for staying in bed while mummy went to the loo (or whatever) and they've been great at staying in bed ever since. No real issues here, just took patience
Now to get the third big bed so DD2 can start off in her own bed and start the process all over again! haha.
It's not your parenting, otherwise how come all those crappy parents out there have kids that sleep through? lol
You know i went through the same thing with my DD and i think honestly sometimes mums are just sooo tired from not having decent sleep that we stress over everything. Your DD is sleeping through now so maybe just think when it's getting rough that you only have to last another year or so and DS will be the same? Go with it rather than fight it, IYKWIM?
Also next time people cough cough tell you you are doing it wrong, tell them that they are more than welcome to come and stay and help you try and work out a better routine, you know they won't do it so then at least that will shut them up for awhile!
It helps me to think that it is natural for them to want to be with you. It is what babies need, to be with an adult all the time. There are lots of articles about it being genetics and children's natural urges to be close to an adult in case of emergencies and/or needing to be on the move. (Ie, many moons ago, if there was a fire or some predatory animal was around or something like that, then a baby/young child's best chance of survival is to be with an adult). It really makes sense to me.
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