Learning an instrument - questions for musicians or parents of kids who are musical

[YoYo]

I noticed DS was really into music when he turned 4, always tapping to beats, so asked him then if he wanted to play the drums.

He started then, right after we'd moved and he didn't really have anything else, no school or friends, but he struggled. Not because of not wanting to do it, he just wasn't confident yet. We stopped and waited another year, so had turned 5.

He really loved it. He could reach the peddles better too. His teacher didn't pressure him at all, he learned slowly but steadily. After a year he could have done a drum solo at the eisteddfod, but we were away in oz at the time.

Then we moved and it was the only thing he wanted to do again. Got him into lessons after school one day a week but he was more pressured to read music rather than just enjoy what he was doing. We also haven't been able to set up his kit as our place is too small for it, and he was getting into 'trouble' for not practicing. Hitting his sticks on the couch just isn't the same!!

Anyway, I pulled him out for now, till he can have his kit and start playing for enjoyment first before getting into lessons again.

I played the flute when I was younger, and just hated being forced into practicing and the pressure of it all when I just wanted to enjoy the music.

[blue_hebe]

I agree with child-led. It's a lot easier if the passion comes from the child.

You can always expose your child to music, concerts, singing etc and hopefully the interest will follow

Encourage your children to sing - it's useful to be able to hear the different pitches in a tune before attempting an instrument.

[Santosha]

Thanks so much for all your replies. Really interesting and helpful to read and fery encouraging that so many have success stories that are very much child-led. I hope that, if they're interested, I can support my kids in pursuing music in a respectful and encouraging way and that their experience and outcome is vastly different from mine.

Starting age seems to vary wildly so I guess I'll just go by their interest and individual temperaments. We have a house full of instruments, so the second they're interested there's plenty of opportunity!

[surprised]

- what age would you start?
I don't think there is a great deal of point doing lessons until a child can read relatively well (so mid-first year of school for many). If you want your kid to be an international concert pianist, sure, start them with Suzuki when they are 2. But for those who want to give their child a musical education, 5-8 is a good age to start. Bear in mind if you start them when they are very young you really need to commit to supervising their practice (especially if they can't read what they are meant to be doing)

- what instruments are best to start with?
Piano is great because you address music reading and theory as well as learning the actual instrument. Because you use 2 clefs and can play many notes at once, you get to look at a wider range of theory than you would on another instrument. Also, if you are a competent pianist you'll fairly easily pick up other instruments down the track.

It is also very common to start strings at a young age, and you can get smaller size guitars too.

- do you have opinions or experience with models of learning?
Horses for courses really. A lot depends on how serious you want to be about the whole thing. I think it's more important that a teacher connects with your child and gives them a life-long love of learning than that they teach a particular method (they all have their pros and cons).

- do you need to insist on or push for daily practice? I imagine that few children volunteer to screech away at an amateur and tuneless 'twinkle twinkle' for 30 mins a day, but when learning an instrument is such a technical skill, this level of practice is required to make it happen. You have to be a bit rubbish, and put in a whole lot of hard yards to become accomplished. Can this be achieved in a 'gentle', respectful or child-led way?

If you want to waste a whole lot of money, put a child in music lessons and don't make them practice. You are essentially paying for a 30 minute babysitting session each week. Of course, there are too many people who have horrible memories of being forced to practice, and we don't want to add to that number. But if your child doesn't love what they are doing enough that they will voluntarily practice (knowing also that they are expected to), save everyone the heartache and find a new hobby (at least until the child wants to practice).

4x20 min practice sessions a week will see some good achievements for most students. Schedule it in to their week (before school is awesome if there is time - that way it can't get skipped when the day gets busy). If you go for say a term and your child has been doing minimal practice, I'd be having a serious chat about whether they want to continue.

In looking for a teacher, if they are young, make sure they have a music degree. While years ago it was common for amazing musicians not to go to uni, I'd question the dedication of anyone under 35 who claims to be a music teacher but hasn't studied it at a tertiary level. The 15 year old up the street who charges $5 a lesson isn't a good idea - beginners need professional teachers so that lifelong bad habits aren't established!

Help your child to discover music they love, and help them understand where it came from. Show them The Beatles. Queen. Abba. Take them to a concert that's not kids music. Help them understand what real, live music is - not just the overproduced plasticky auto tuned rubbish that's out there.

Buy your kids the best quality instrument you can afford. Dodgy instruments are not a pleasure to play. If you are going to have piano lessons and want to start on a keyboard, get one that has a decent level of polyphony (number of notes that can be played at once) and that is touch-sensitive. The lower end digital pianos are a great start.

And find out whether the teacher is a contemporary or classical specialist, especially for piano and to some extent guitar. A classical teacher who thinks they can do contemporary isn't necessarily correct.

Oh and if you send your child to singing lessons, and you want them to have any kid of future in singing beyond doing it in the shower, make sure they are learning to read music.

With any luck, one day you will get the immense satisfaction of watching your child standing on stage having the time of their life!

[Miss.September]

- what age would you start?
I don't think there is a great deal of point doing lessons until a child can read relatively well (so mid-first year of school for many). If you want your kid to be an international concert pianist, sure, start them with Suzuki when they are 2. But for those who want to give their child a musical education, 5-8 is a good age to start. Bear in mind if you start them when they are very young you really need to commit to supervising their practice (especially if they can't read what they are meant to be doing)

Why do you say this? My DD1 is 4, can't read (she recognizes a handful of words) but has no problem reading music. Just wondering what your experience is to say this and whether my DD will have problems down the track (I wasn't anticipating any!).

[surprised]

Hi PacRak,

That's awesome that your daughter is doing so well. In my experience this isn't usual and I can't see that she'd have any probs down the track.

Generally teaching kids who can't read means they can't read their practice notes and any words written on the music itself, so they go to practice and don't have a clue what to do. If the parent helps them that can make it work, but most parents just don't have the time for this.

So relax and enjoy your daughter's beautiful music!

[~ Mylitta ~]

My three kids all really love music. Our whole family is quite musical (ok, so I can't play an instrument or sing very well, but I use to work in the music industry because of my love of music). Even DD2 can't say many words yet, but she can sing a whole lot of songs, lol.

We are really lucky because our local music school/shop do music lessons for toddlers (i's called Bambino Beats). They even only charge us for DS and DD1. The class is about introducing musical concepts to the little kids and just developing a love for music. The classes are quite repetitive, but that's what is great about them. A class generally involves a warm up of a couple of songs the kids can sing and dance to, like "Hot potato" and "Jump Jump Star" (DD2's favorite!), then they choose some percussion instruments and use them in time to the beat of a song. This is when they have been introduced to crotchets and quavers, and all the kids in the class recognise the symbols and know their names. Next come the drums. They play little double bongo-type drums with their sticks and bang them loud or soft based on the dynamic symbols their teacher holds up (forte and piano), then repeat it or finish when those symbols are shown. Next up is guitar. The kids are adorable playing their ukuleles to a song. And now they have started learning "Twinkle Twinkle" on the glockenspiel.