we don't get screaming so much but we do get occasional meltdowns. i agree with kim & i try (even though it can be frustrating!) to stay calm - i figure that DS is having an explosion of emotion that he doesn't know how to deal with (even if it seems to be over something we would consider trivial) so i need to demonstrate to him how to stay calm & that i understand something is frustrating/upsetting him but we need to be calm to deal with it (that's not to say i haven't lost my cool a few times ).

i also agree with kim about it depending on the individual child - my DS is (and has always been) one that needs/wants to be held. he gets more upset if i push him away & so i let him sit on my knee while he gets it out of his system. if he kicks his legs etc i remind him that i know he's frustrated but that he needs to be gentle with mummy & i won't be able to hold him if he does it.

if DS wanting something has triggered the outburst then i explain he needs to ask nicely or why he wasn't able to have it.