thread: For those who have children of only one sex

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  1. #1
    Registered User

    Jul 2007
    melb
    8,498

    I always wanted 1 of each, when DS1 was born I just imaginied that number 2 would be a girl, which of course he wasn't, for a split 2nd when DH told me sex at my CS I was disapointed but once I saw him I was ok. I do still have days of wanting a girl to go shopping with, dress in cute dresses, play dolls with etc but if I was to have a 3rd there is no gurantee it would be a girl. I have always wanted 3 children but DH does not he only wants 2. The boys as much as they fight are very cute together and I am sure will be close when they are older.

    I am 1 of 3 I have 2 brothers both younger than me. DH only has 1 sister.

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Jul 2007
    Melbourne
    247

    I have two boys and quite honestly had slight gender disappointment when we found out at the 19wk scan that DS2 was a boy. DS1 I always new was a boy we didn't find out with him but in my heart new. I only ever gravitated to boys clothes, toys etc. The whole pregnancy was different with DS2 so in my heart I really thought he was a girl. I'm glad that I found out when I did because it gave me the time to adjust and I wouldn't change him for anything. There will be no more for us I find the first 12 months over whelming and only now DS2 has turned 17mths am I starting to feel a bit like my old self. No PND, but I just loose myself hard to put into words. The other side of the coin is my DH is from mainly boys, his father 1 of 4, DH 1 of 2 and DH's brother has 4. The thoughts that I am still working through are I will always be a MIL so not the first person they will turn to when they have partners/wives/children for motherly advice and the fact that I will never use the girl name I have had picked out since I was 12. I am not ready to get rid of any of the clothes or things that they used a lot as babies, but some of the bigger items I have started to give away or sell.

  3. #3

    Mar 2004
    Sparta
    12,662

    Before DS2 was born I thought I didn't really want any daughters but I surprised myself after DS2 was born by feeling very sad that I would never have one. I actually found myself tearing up in shopping centres when I saw mothers and daughters (especially older daughters) shopping together. I don't really feel sad that I will never have a little girl but I do sometimes feel sad that I will never share the bond that my mother and I had when I was older with a daughter of my own. I also feel kind of sad that I will never be able to pass all my jewelry to my own daughter.
    I certainly don't feel enough yearning for a daughter to go back and try for number 3 although for a while I wanted to.
    TBH it would cause a lot of stress in my marriage if we had a daughter. DH is Afghan and whilst he's ok with a pretty non-traditional wife I think he would revert to type if he had a daughter. He might surprise me but I don't really want to put it to the test.

  4. #4
    Registered User
    Add EsJay on Facebook

    Jan 2009
    Hunter Valley
    609

    Not at all. This will be my second girl and DH's third. I'm slightly disappointed for him, to not be getting a son to do all the male things with, but as he said hes ok with 3 healthy perfect girls. I have 2 step sisters, so maybe coming from growing up with only sisters has contributed to this, as im not really sure of how to do anything with boys, and maybe not feeling done yet helps me feel this way too? but nope, not in the slightest.

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    6,900

    I have 2 girls and am more than happy with it. I always wanted a girl, I wanted DD1 to be a girl, and I was so greedy that I hoped DD2 would be a girl too, even though I thought she was a boy. I never had a sister and always wanted one and I knew I would be so disappointed not to have a daughter. All I feel is relieved that I have my girls I wanted. We are planning on have 2 more though and I guess chances are I will have a boy some time so I haven't worried about it yet. I would be happy with another girl next, I have a name ready already, lol. If I didn't end up having a boy I would be a bit disappointed but more so for DH than myself.

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    Dandenong Ranges, Melbourne.
    5,673

    i absolutely love having two boys. wouldn't change it for anything. they get on like a house on fire, even though they are totally different. we can pass down clothes, toys etc. they like watching the same tv shows. its awesome.
    we are not having any more kids, but if we were i would actually want another boy. nothing against girls, of course, i just love having only boys.

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    Adelaide
    3,201

    I think this baby will be boy #2, Both DH and I are slightly more in favour of having a girl, however we are totally excited about having a boy as well. DS however has other ideas and tells everyone and us repeatedly that he is having a baby sister (he will be the one struggling with gender disappointment LOL) - after battling infertility we aren't about to get choosy, just being lucky enough to have a child (and now a second) is good enough for us.

    I would like to have a daughter of course, but if I don't, I will just work extra hard on having meaningful and loving relationships with my future daughter in laws

  8. #8
    Registered User

    May 2008
    Melbourne
    1,838

    I have 2 boys and 1 girl.

    I pretty much expected to have a boy when pregnant with DS1 as boys were so dominant in our family. Then when i was pregnant with DS2 i was unsure whether or not to expect another boy or if we'd be lucky enough (i really do consider those to have one of each really lucky) to have one of each. However i think deep down both DH and I were hoping for another boy, which at the 20 week scan we found out we were having.

    For me personaly my reasoning was that i'd had such a rocky relationship with my mother growing up i was very nervous about having my own daughter and i think for DH it was just that he was worried about having a daughter and protecting her.

    So having two boys DH and i were extremely happy and when the talk of having anymore children came about we had pretty much agreed that we were more happy than we could ever hope for with 2 boys. To a certain extent it wasn't even about the genders it was the fact that we were blessed with two healthy children.

    So when we unexpectedly fell preganant with DD we had mixed emotions.

    But jump to where we are now and i am thrilled to have a daughter, she is so precious and absolutely completes our family more than we could have ever hoped for. We thought we were happy before but now i know we are really really happy.

    I know for some there are other factors to take into account but for me children are blessing full stop.

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Jan 2006
    country victoria
    1,055

    I have all boys, and yes somedays I do wish that I had a girl. Not so much for the being able to buy pink things, but more so for later on to have that mother/daughter relationship. Plus I dread being only the MIL, that being said I live near my MIL and see far more of her than my own mother. So who knows what will happen down the track.

    I must say how lovely it has been to read this thread and to see women who have only boys and are happy. All then time (esepcially since the birth of my 4th son) I just get pity from people, it is like having boys is the worst thing on the world. My boys are actually great friends, they can be noisy (but I'm sure so can girls) but they get along really really well. So I find it so upsetting that people feel the need to pity me because I have 4 beautiful sons. Just an observation I'm not sure if people of all girls feel the same.

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Apr 2006
    Perth
    4,203

    I must say how lovely it has been to read this thread and to see women who have only boys and are happy. All then time (esepcially since the birth of my 4th son) I just get pity from people, it is like having boys is the worst thing on the world. My boys are actually great friends, they can be noisy (but I'm sure so can girls) but they get along really really well. So I find it so upsetting that people feel the need to pity me because I have 4 beautiful sons. Just an observation I'm not sure if people of all girls feel the same.
    I have to agree with this. It really frustrates me that people make comments about my girls, and especially now I'm pregnant again - the number of comments I get from family, friends and strangers all along the lines of hoping for a boy this time because we couldn't possibly want another girl. That people could consider my daughters anything other than perfect purely due to their sex makes me angry.

  11. #11
    Registered User

    Mar 2008
    North Northcote
    8,065

    i totally didnt care about the sex of our second baby whatsoever, but for a fleeting moment and a few brief moments after the 20 week scan i did go through a bit of grieving that I would never know what it would be like to have a boy, to have a son ITMS (because bub no.2 was going to be our last). but then after a little bit, i also then realised that i had NO idea what DD2 was going to look like, or be like and funnily enough it was this thought that totally brought me back into balance. we are all made different and boy or girl each child is unique IYKWIM.

  12. #12
    Registered User

    Dec 2010
    262

    I only have one at the moment but am currently pregnant but I really am not fussed either way.

    I have two sisters and a brother and at different stages of my life I have been closer to each of them. My younger brother is only 10mths younger than me so we had alot of the same friends, my middle sister is only 12mths older so again we did heaps of stuff together..... I just want my DD to have a sibling so either way is fine with me!

  13. #13
    Registered User

    Dec 2011
    6

    Always thought that it would be one of each. I grew up with the a mix of boys/girls and was very close with each at different stages throughout, and am now close with all of them.

  14. #14
    Registered User

    Dec 2011
    melbourne
    20

    im a mama to 4 girls (and a surprise DS) and my daughters are all so close, they do have their moments of course like all siblings, but in the most part they are best buddies, they all sleep in the same room, we had 2 separate bedrooms for them, but they only wanted to be together.
    when i fell pregnant with babe #5 i convinced myself i would have a 5th girl (even tho i have boy vibes) and i would have been very happy to have a 5th wee woman
    but when we saw the penis on the ultrasound, i was shocked, but kinda knew iykwim?
    im now pregnant with babe #6 and would actually like another boy for my son to have a brother, its the first time ive actually wanted a particular sex, dont get me wrong id be happy either way, and my son is adored my his 4 big sisters, but id like for him to have a brother to share boy stuff with.
    i kinda have a feeling ill have another girl, i wont be disappointed, but i will feel bad for L, even tho i know he will have his 4 big sisters to dote on him.
    lol i dunno if im making any sense at all so will stop rambling :P

  15. #15
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    6,979

    No, I have never really cared what we had, as long as we could have a few babies, and HEALTHY kids was my main concern.

    If we have all girls, I will be stoked! If we have a boy next, I will be stoked