I think it is important to find the balance, but also that the mix that makes up the balance isn't always going to be the same. In the first year or two after having a baby, I think being a mother takes much more time and energy, and probably is also more fulfilling. So while the "right" balance at that time might be far more "mum" than "me", this is not a problem unless you're not fulfilled or happy with the way things are. Once our kids start to become more independent, especially once they become kindy and school kids, then the balance changes, until there is more "me" than "mum". This transition can take some time, and will happen at different times for us all. But once it happens nurturing the "me" part as well as maintaining enough of the "mum" part to meet everyone's needs can be challenging but also rewarding.

As a full time working mum I struggle to find enough "me", but I think I'm improving at it. Perhaps if I'd started earlier it would have been easier, but I really wasn't ready then. Our kids are young for such a small time, I didn't want to miss that. My calling at that time was to be "mum" and I'm very glad that I followed my instincts. I didn't need as much "me" because I was getting what I needed. I guess it's not so much that you can be too much "mum" in the beginning but more a matter of knowing when "me" needs to reappear.