evening routine - kids in bed by 7pm?

[Roryrory]

So, I am about to enter the brave new world of being a SAHM (for a whole YEAR!!) so I want to move our boys from their current routine to a more "family" friendly one.

Currently I work full time so the boys (aged 4 and 2 and a half) eat dinner with us between 6.30pm and 7.30pm (depending on when I get home and how organised we are) and between 7.30 and 8.30 it is bath/shower, teeth brushing and book time before bed at 8.30pm. They currently nap in the afternoons, Ollie always and Flynn every three days or so.

Once I am home full time I would like to have them in bed by 7pm. But I've found that even on days when I am around I am so used to the current routine that I struggle to get it all done in time. Obviously I am starting my "evening" routine way too late.

So what do you do, if you get your kids fed, bathed and in bed early? When do you start dinner? Do your kids nap? Do they bath before or after dinner? Do you and your partner eat with them or separately? Feel free to be specific because I am quite OTT with routines and organising, so you won't freak me out with any displays of control-freakism

Of course, there will soon be a newborn in the mix so that will obviously throw a dummy in the works, but I would like to give it a try....

[BellyBelly]

I start dinner earlyish as much as I can - 5.30-6pm... then aim to have one in the shower by 6.30-6.45 then the second by 7.00pm... then bed 7.30. I could probably extend that to 8pm as they are up pretty early, but I like the idea of them relaxing in bed, reading and winding down after a cuddle on the couch from 7.15-7.30. If they start watching a show, they want to keep watching and makes bedtime harder!

[BrightSparkles]

similar to kel,b/n 5 - 5.30 start bath
b/n 6 - 6.30 have dinner
bottle at 7, book and bed at 7.30pm.

doesn't matter what time miss j goes to bed shes ALWAYS up at 6am

[OceanPrincess]

Hey Rory!

We start bedtime routine at about 5pm - DH runs the bath and I start on dinner, if I haven't gotten it organized before then. I am lucky that DH works for himself so he can be home a bit earlier.

DD is usually in the bath by 5.30pm, out and dressed by 6pm, when we have dinner. Then it's quiet games til about quarter to seven when it's into night nappy, last drink of milk, brush teeth, prayers and bed by 7pm.

Lately she has actually had a few showers, with DH, which he finds easier sometimes.

Newborn DS doesn't have a bedtime routine yet but when he is awake he goes in the bath with DD. That will be our plan when he is old enough.

Hope that helps.

[*Belle*]

Mines a bit different but both girls are in bed at 7pm.

We usually go out in the morning, come home and have a bath then lunch then afternoon nap.

5pm start cooking dinner
5.30pm Eat dinner
6pm - 6.30pm play/read books etc quiet down time
6.30pm brush teeth, toilet, change nappy etc
6.45pm read book to each child for bedtime story and tuck them in
7pm tuck in and leave the room and let them settle.
They usually sleep until 7am next morning

[Traveller]

We tend to eat dinner between 5pm - 5.30pm, bath at 6pm, stories at 6.30pm, twins go to bed at 7pm and older 2 go to bed at 7.30pm.

[Bathsheba]

This is tricky. Short answer: We have a very loose routine. It is hard because my 6yo wants to go to bed early but my 4yo basically won't let him do that because they share a room. My 4yo is full of energy and wont go to bed until I have my DH home to help me.... which is around 7pm... and I find it hard to ask DH to launch straight into the night routine as soon as he walks in the door. So my boys eat dinner quite late, when DH gets home.... also because I like the idea of us all eating at the table at least once a day (otherwise DH would hardly see them!).

They have their baths before dinner (starting at about 6pm) so after dinner (at about 7.15pm) all they have to do is brush their teeth and go to bed... but in reality my 6yo wants to do his reader (homework) with Dad. We try to settle our 4yo at this time but he is like a jack-in-the-box. Sooo in reality they are both in bed by about 8pm. If I had two boys like my 6yo then it would be more straightforward... but my live wire 4yo really requires the extra help of my DH and frustratingly he doesn't get home until 7pm most nights. Tricky. Maybe things will improve with a tree change... here's hoping!

I'd aspire to your preferred routine... but at the end of the day it might be personalities and your DH's routine that makes or breaks it. Good luck!

ETA: this thread has got me thinking. I suspect that if I am honest with myself I probably allow the boys to stay up beyond 7pm so as to not only see their dad but so that that dad can see how challenging it is do do the evening routine. I do the morning routine by myself (including a school run) so DH can get out the door to work and I have my 4yo all day and I guess that if I also did the evening routine DH would almost be totally shielded from the hardest part of raising kids. Is it bad that I just don't want to be taken for granted? He looks after them for about half a day each weekend when i have my Me Time... but there should be more to father hood than that... I think. Not saying that anyone is wrong with what routine they choose though.

[~me~]

I have a pretty strict routine at night...
4:30pm I am getting the kids dinner ready.
5pm the kids eat dinner..including DD now. I do the dishes while they eat. They are usually finished by 5:30pm, so they either play or watch the giggle and hoot night hour until it's time for a bath, they like the giggle and hoot goodnight song
6pm bath, all three of them in together, they are usually out by 6:15, so they go and play for a little while.
6:30pm DD goes to bed after a BF
6:45pm stories for DS2 then in bed by 7pm (he no longer has a sleep during the day)
7:00pm story or school book for DS1 and in bed by 7:30pm

We tend to have our dinner either when the kids are in bed or while they are playing after a bath. This is simply due to DH not being home until 7ish most nights. Usually by the time he gets home dinner has either been cooked through the day or everything is chopped and ready to go.
This routine still worked well when DD was a newborn, I think it helped her establish a good night routine as well. If it came to be that she needed feeding while still very little and the boys were having dinner, I would do it in the kitchen sitting on stool while they ate and chatted away to me about their day.

I also have a rule for me...I do not do any housework of any kind (including folding washing) after the kids are in bed. DH and either chat, have a glass of wine, watch TV together or I go to bed early and read a book. Or of course I play on BB

[sangie]

During the week DH is not home early enough for us to have dinner all together so this is what I do:

2pm Cook dinner or at least start preparing while DS is sleeping
5.30pm dinner
6.00pm bath for DS and either bath/shower for DD
6.45pm bottle for DS
7.00pm Story and bedtime for DS
Then I spend 30mins with DD - cuddle on couch with a story, usually a chat about our day, brush teeth etc and she's in bed around 7.30pm

On the weekend we usually have dinner 6 - 6.30pm. DS still goes to bed at 7pm but usually DD is up until around 8pm.

[beckoes]

i have dinner ready for DD and myself at 5.30/6.00pm. if DP has the day off he eats with us otherwise he normally gets home about 5.30 so doesnt like to eat as soon as he walks in but he sits at the table with us while we eat. then we play in the lounge for a bit, DP and DD spend some time together if he has been at work, read books or do some puzzels, quiet games. then we run the bath at about 6.45/7pm that normally lasts 15 mins. in to pjs and to bed. she is normally asleep by 8pm. some times, depending on the day sleep...if it over runs to 4pm, which it sometimes does then bed time shifts back half and hour to an hour. and it works the other way too...if she has little or no day sleep she is normally begging for bed by 5.30!!
i have tried to get her in bed earlier but she is an early bird and im not that great at getting up at 5am! so i opt for a little later to bed and up at 6am!! good luck

[aussienic]

ok generally we eat between 5 and 6.. usually 5 when Dh is at work... and when he is on days off we tend to eat around 6 (reason there is 2 of us to get through the night routine)

Baths straight after dinner. or before depending what we are having ie is it messy

in bed by 7-7:15.. Hopefully asleep before 8.. Sometimes they are out like a light by 7:01 this routine includes my 11 yr old as he needs that sleep..

DD sleeps on average 3 times a week (during the day) on those days she does fight us a little to go to bed but she fights most nights anyways. I do try not let her go down any later then 1pm and def not sleeping later then 2:30-3pm.. Otherwise she is feral to get to bed

While we aren't super strict on this routine it just seems to be what we do every night lol.. Our kids can still adjust if we go out somewhere at night but we tent to avoid that anyways cus it is easier to do lunch rather then dinner out

[Bathsheba]

I like that last bit about being able to adjust Nic When I think about it our loose routine does mean that our kids are able to adjust if necessary. If we are invited to a function our kids aren't a mess by 8pm. But a routine is still good for kids... on the whole... but like anything, appetite, etc kids are like adults and need subtle variations. I don't think I'd like my life ruled by a clock... I know that I should be in bed with the light out at 9.30pm every night... but in reality I just don't feel tired at 9.30pm every night and there's nothing worse than tossing and turning waiting for sleep. I think there's a lot to be said for flexibility

[aussienic]

I know my kids are ready for bed by 7 as I just know lol.. they all have their own little signs. for eg Ds1 rubs one eye constantly when he is tired.. Plus my kids are up by 6 EVERY morning regardless of what time they go to bed. The odd time they go to bed around 10 for example they are usually up at 5:30.

so yeh we are flexible like tonight for example. Dd asked to go to bed at 6:30 and boys sat up with my mum watching tv till 7:30.. They put up a fight about going to bed but all 3 were out like lights at 7:45..