Sorry, I don't think it's a continuum between those two things. I don't even think those two things are opposite.

I think sharing your own experiences with your children is just as much a part of experiential learning as them doing it all completely for themselves. This is because, as humans, we are all story tellers, and telling our stories is part of passing our wisdom on. We can encourage our children in the same way by inviting them to tell the stories of their own experience, and to listen with the same kind of respect.

Also, I do think there are valuable lessons we can pass along without having lived them ourselves. For example, I can teach my daughters about online safety without ever having been stalked or abused online myself. I can teach them to recognise the signs of respect and disrespect without ever having had an abusive partner. A framework of listening and witnessing each others' knowledge and experience helps everyone get there together. But you have to be having these conversations. Faffing on constantly about the weather and what's on the teev doesn't make it happen.