2 yo daughter constantly masturbating Part II - Epic fail

[goddessofdawn]

Problem resolved - thank you

[maybebaby2012]

Oh my goodness, you poor thing! I saw your other thread but didn't have anything helpful to add. DD (7) went through a stage of doing this recently, but the age difference is vast so telling her to take it elsewhere eventually worked. But she was persistent, it certainly took me telling her a good many times before she got the hint, even at her age. I also lost my cool one day when I turned around and she was doing it in the back of the car! Again, i just reiterated that it was perfectly alright if she wanted to touch her own body, but it is private and mummy and daddy get embarrassed when she does it in front of us so could she please go to her bedroom if she would like to do that. Mind you, by this stage this was said in a rather screeching voice and DH was mortified. He doesn't really do well with these conversations, always up to me! Doh!

I'm almost 99.9% sure she will grow out of it! It's very rare for adults to do it persistently or in public, so it must pass in it's own time, it is probably more common than you think it's just that us adults can be terribly awkward when it comes to discussing children & sexuality. It's quite taboo obviously.

[sloane]

I have no advice but I wanted to offer a few and also say that maybe you can make a special appointment with the mchn - I made an extra one for my ds when I was worried about his behaviour last year.


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[Ginger]

honestly, i would probably speak to my gp about it now and see if they can help you out with a referral or some strategies?

[*Efjay*]

I would take her to the GP. She might have a vaginal infection like thrush or something. Maybe she is itchy. My cousin had heaps of issues with that sort of thing from a very young age (well before school age).

Take her to the GP. Find someone with a Lady Dr & ask when you make the appointment if they are good with kids.
The medical center I go to, each Dr has a little write up about what sort of things they are interested in. Find your self a good GP & stick with them But yeah I would be wondering if there is more too it then just she enjoys it.
My Daughter has never done it & to be honest, at 2 / 3 yrs of age its not something I would have considered normal. Not this much anyway.

[Santosha]

Does she eat anything with 160b in it? It's been found to be associated with masturbation, head-banging and other impulse-control issues... now tell me why it's not banned??! There is enough research out there now on the potential health and behavioral affects of these additives that in the UK they are required to put a warning label on food containing them. Here... Apparently it's ok to cause children to bash their heads on the floor. (sorry, you may sense a level of bitterness here, but I've seen a beautiful little guy really suffering as he couldn't stop head banging all day long... and stopped completely, 3 days off 160b). Not saying that's def the issue for your DD, but worth ruling out.

It's commonly found in 'plastic' cheese but is in all sorts of other stuff too. Worth checking out whether the behaviour changes on a preservative free diet - I'd try and eliminate 160b first (if it's there) and failing that, other additives.

Hope you find an answer Hun. All kids have an explore, but it does sound like it's becoming 'above and beyond' and stressful for you both.

[Tinks]

Sounds like it's becoming more compulsive. Definitely speak to your Dr about it.

[goddessofdawn]

She only eats whole organic foods. Fruit, veg, grass-fed beef, free-range chicken & eggs. No junk, no processed anything, no cereal... so it can't be 160b because we don't eat processed foods.

[goddessofdawn]

Efjay, Dr sears website says it is perfectly normal for kids 2/3 to do this. But not this much.

Don't worry, I know she's not normal. Best thing to do is remove myself from the situation

[loulabelle]

Is she unwell otherwise? If she is getting sick, she might be seeking the comfort/distraction. My dd has just come down with the flu but she was speaking in one word sentences and melting down constantly earlier in the week, so I can see she obviously wasn't well.

I was a compulsive masturbator as a child. I used to constantly get into trouble. Even at preschool (hahaha especially when I showed another girl how to do it!)

She will grow out of it. I would ignore it and when she does it, just take her hand away gently and distract. If she is persistent tell her it's for the bedroom thanks and if she's still persistent move her there physically.

I would wait a week and see if it's not illness related. A trip to the gp might help rule out thrush or an infection too.

Good luck!

This.

Oh hun, it sounds very hard. Personally I would persist with what you're doing for a week or so more, these things take time. Then perhaps a visit with your gp to discuss where else you go with it. This won't happen forever, I promise. She's still very little and doesn't understand what she's doing, which is why you have to persist with what youve been doing.Good luck. You're doing a fantastic job xxx

[loulabelle]

Efjay, Dr sears website says it is perfectly normal for kids 2/3 to do this. But not this much.

Don't worry, I know she's not normal. Best thing to do is remove myself from the situation

Just another variation of normal . How many 2/3 year old boys do you see holding their willy? They do it constantly. But, I understand that the compulsiveness is what is bothering you.

[goddessofdawn]

Thanks Loulabelle. I think I am expecting too much of her - an instant change. She is still only 2 years old, after all...
I will persist.
She went to her nana's today and played with dolls the whole time - no "issues" were reported, so that's good.
Maybe she is just bored at home. If only I had a cook and maid so I could be a 24/7 Entertaining mother!

[delphmoon]

Hmm. This might have been covered elsewhere but could she be itchy, thrush or uti? How do you know its masturbation?

[goddessofdawn]

She doesn't actually make skin-to-skin contact becaue there is a nappy and/or clothes innthe way.
In the bath, she doesn't touch herslef at all!

Santosha, would love to hear about the sensory disorder

[Lolpigs]

If she isnt touching her skin perhaps it is just itchy? If she isnt touching the the bath that sounds like it may be the answer. I know my DD cant wait to grab and rub once the nappy comes off so much so it looks like she will her herself and she is only 9 months ( so much so I've given her nappy off time every day and it seems to help) so perhaps its just something as simple as its itching her and she needs to scratch and cant get at it? I have very sensitive skin and it seem so does my DD.

I would definatley take her to the dr, and also keep an eye out for any discharge or the white rash associated with thrush. If its on her nappies (if you use cloth) you will need to disinfect them all with canestean as she would be reinfecting herself.

[delphmoon]

She doesn't actually make skin-to-skin contact becaue there is a nappy and/or clothes innthe way.
In the bath, she doesn't touch herslef at all!

So what does she do that makes you think its masturbation?

[goddessofdawn]

info in other thread

[Keta]

If she doesn't make skin to skin contact, could you try underwear rather than a nappy. It's not really toilet training weather but perhaps the nappy rubs and sets off a sensation which leads to the behaviour. Therefore if there was no nappy the behaviour would not be triggered as often??? I may be completely off the mark.
Perhaps lots of structured activities too, so you can still get things done but redirect her to a more desired behaviour each time she begins masturbating. This way you wouldn't need to even talk about going to her room, she will just slowly realise that the only time she doesn't get disrupted and redirected is if she is in private. It will be a long process and these things tend to get worse before they get better when you start to change a behaviour but with perseverance it usually works. xxx