Pregnancy After Stillbirth/Recurrent Miscarriage/Late Loss February 2009

Hey all,

I know I haven't been in here for ages but I just had to come in

Judy - Goodluck hun, I can't beleive your nearly there, xoxoxo

Laney - I just wanted to say how happy I am to see that your doing so well, xoxoxo

I'll second that Jo :D

I'm a stranger in these parts too, but do check in on your lovely ladies.......

Laney - it's amazing after all you have been through to now be (finally!!!) getting good news, I'm so happy your little boy is thriving!!

Jude - How are you??? Couple of weeks tops, look forward to coming to visit you and meeting Daniel!!!! Make sure you let me know!!!! Hope you are keeping well.

Hi Jo - how are you, you have a tough first anniversary coming up, it's never easy. I just had Luc's 2nd birthday, and tbh, it just sucked without him here. I hope things are going okay for you.

Remy is such a dumpling. She now goes to swimming lessons, and loves it, doesn't mind going underwater. She's adorable, I should update my ticker photo!! I just CAN'T make up my mind whether to have just one more????????????? I'm so full on busy with 3 kids already, and don't want to be greedy - but there's a big age gap between my first two and Remy, so she is kind of an only child iykwim....... any advice ladies??????????

Hugs to all,

Lee x

Hi girls,

I hope you don't mind me jumping into your forum.

I have popped in because I recently found out that I'm pregnant again and have found your stories to be quite calming on the nerves. It's nice see so many lengthy pregnancies - it makes me feel better.

I've lost two babies, both girls. One at 14 weeks (button)and one at 23 weeks (Grace Catherine). One was due to malformation which resulted in poor heart function and finally miscarriage and the other was due to an incompetent cervix (Grace was perfectly healthy - its such a wrong scenario).

6 months later I'm finally pregnant again but have found that I'm not allowing myself to accept this pregnancy. I am overwhelmed with happiness inside and feel so so blessed but I'm still in denial that this could really happen for me. I am almost pre-empting another disappointment.

Any thoughts? I would love to hear about how you all felt when you finally found out your were pregnant again.

Just to clarify that

Thanks so much, Joselyn. xxx

Lee I have your number programmed into my mobile ph now. Had to get one of Gregs friends to do it coz i am useless with the mobile ph.
Had my OB appt today and have put the sumamry up on my pregnancy blog (link should be in my siggy) but in short at 32 wks daniel was in the 90% and measured 3 weeks ahead and has now dropped to the 15% and is 2 weeks behind. he has hardly grown at all since 32 wks. OB will not talk induction but with my othe pgs at this stage he also said no to induction but come 38 wks he changes his mind and out the baby comes. Doppler flow on the cord was great and plenty of fluid for now so I have no idea why Daniel has slowed gorwing but it has happened at this stage with every pg I have had.

Lee go for another. We wanted two close together like Tash and Nic are (13mths apart) but ended up with a 4.5yr gap this time round!

Welcome Joselyn. I knew another girl named Josie who lost a little girl named Grace at the same stage to incompetent cervix but she has since had another baby. Will you Drs be putting in a cervical stitch?

I am off to bed after a long day.
hugs to all our pg mummies and new mummies
Jude

Just quickly wanted to respond to Laney - so happy to read that you have a big bubba on the way. After all you have been through I know it must be hard to believe, but this one is going to be your earth baby. So happy for you. I can't wait to hear more. :hug:

Hi ladies,

Laney, so happy to hear your boy is growing well :) I'm sure it's hard to believe/accept it after Parker and Shelby but your boy will be born nice and big!

Judy, that's odd about Daniel's growth but I guess the measurements are based on averages, not ideals and if it's happened in your previous pregnancies I guess it's good that he's normal!!

Joselyn, a big welcome!! I think what you're describing is perfectly normal. It feels dangerous to get your hopes up, especially if you have no living children to prove to yourself that it is possible. But it does get better, esp if you are confident that you are getting the extra medical attention you need. The fact that you have a diagnosed problem that can be addressed is also good (in a strange way!). I remember trying to distance myself from getting attached then I asked myself honestly, if I lost this bub too, would avoiding attachment make it easier? And of course it wouldn't. So try and appreciate and enjoy every day with your bub and just take it one day at a time.

As for me, less than 2 weeks to go... I am slowly getting a cold though so am feeling pretty terrible, sore throat and bad headache. I'm just hoping that I don't have a cough when I have the C-section, I remember coughing last time and it felt like my abdomen would bust open. Unfortunately feeling this way is making me very unmotivated to do all the things on my list I want to get done... luckily the parents are coming next week so I'll work my Mum.

Can't wait!!!

Hi girls,

Judy: thanks for sharing your experiences, it helps SOOO much when you see that other people have gone on to have positive outcomes. Thanks, you're a star!! Yesterday I went and bought a little white jump suit, nothing fancy, but just something to look at so I can show myself that this is really happening. Its such a wierd feeling, I'm so thrilled but yet, in such denial! Either way, I am pregnant and I have a wonderful little bean inside of me and I'm going to love it every day that I have it!

Rozzie: thanks to you also, I am DEFINITELY getting the stitch put in. Actually, that is something I haven't considered yet - that I'll be in hospital facing this part of the pregnancy in around 9 - 11 weeks - ooohhh scary!

I'm going to close up and read all about your stories now.

Love Joselyn xx

Hi girls,

Just another quickie, can I hear form anyone who had an incompetent cervix and is now pregnant? I would really love to hear about your experiences.

Thanks so much, Jos.

Hi everyone

Welcome to the group Joselyn and congrats on your pg. I think I congratulated you in the TTC group too but another one won't hurt :D
I am an IC girl - we lost our son Luke in 2007 at 21 weeks after I painlessly dilated. Went into hospital after a bit of blood appeared & my waters broke not long after that. This pg I had a stitch put in at 14 wks & then had regular CL (cervical length) ultrasounds - 16 wks, 19 wks, & then 21 wks where my CL showed it had halved in length in less than 2 wks. I then had 3 wks in hospital on bedrest as a precaution, another u/s at 24 wks showed my CL had grown so I was allowed home on rest. CL u/s at 26 wks showed another increase, as did my last CL check at 28 wks. I have since had no more CL ultrasounds & get around pretty much as normal now. I didn't go back to work at all after my hospital admission & am now on mat leave.
Ummm, that is about it for my experiences this time around! Of course there has been a bundle of fear, uncertainties, and excitement along the way, as all these women have experienced. All I can recommend is setting yourself goals as you go. For me, in the early days it was the weekly ob appts, then the NT scan, then the stitch, then each u/s etc etc. Meeting each milestone was what I needed to get through as I couldn't bear to think too far ahead.
Anyway, any questions about the stitch operation or whatever, I am more than happy to share :)

Laney - I am so happy to read your latest update and see that your boy is growing so well. Such wonderful news :dance:

Tildy, Jude and Rozzie - not long now for you all...good to hear you are all taking it easy and it will be great to see all your announcements. And then I think I might be next?

Theresa - hope the m/s hasn't hit you and things are still going well.

Nothing new with me. Ob appt on Friday showed our little girl is still head down (yay!) and all is great with my BP etc. I see my ob again next week and then my stitch comes out in just over 3 weeks...
I had my baby shower on Sunday and it was great. My friends did a great job with the organising and I have LOTS of pink items. I got given some beautiful gifts and was pretty spoiled I think ;)

Hope everyone has a good Friday and weekend.

Just popping in to keep an eye on the mummies to be...can't wait!!!

Hi Ladies

Welcome Joselyn - glad you are here!!!! My story is on here somewhere but not sure where?!?! It was a while ago when I posted it. It is awesome to be pg again but I am also terrified. Just want to get to the end and have a healthy bub in my arms.

AngelLukesMom - Glad you had a great baby shower!! Thinking of you and just know all will be well and you will have your precious baby in your arms soon.

AFM - Had our nuchal scan today. It was such a relief to see our baby and see the heart beat!!! I have had dreams the last 2 nights that they told me there was no heart beat and I have been freaking out!!!

Results should be received on Ties/Wed. Bub is now 6.6cm and heart rate was 162bpm. I feel so relieved!!! Just want the other results and I may be able to realx a bit.

I am so tired as I have had a 13 hour day yesterday and a 12 hour day today. Just wanted to post before I go to bed.

Take care.
Theresa

Hello,

I just wanted to say thank you for telling me about your experiences so far.

I was getting very excited till I heard you went back into hospital - I think I'm a little terrified at how I would handle that news - I think I would imagine the worst happening all over again. BUT, everything has turned out well for you so far, so I should look at that part of the story right! :P (gotta be more positive..gotta be more positive);)

As for the goal setting - that is exactly what I said to the goals in the TTC forum. I said I would be happy to make it to 6 weeks, then to the 12 weeks, then to the 14 week stitch and then as you said, every ultrasound from there.

So can I ask, do you have any other children or will this be your first? And do you think you will go again if it is your first?

So happy to hear you had a lovely baby shower - it sounds like you deserved the best and you got it. I'm sure the family and friends in your lfie are thirlled for you.

Much love, Joselyn.

Theresa - that is GREAT news about your NT scan! :dance:

Joselyn - Happy to share my story with you :)
Yep, being in hospital sucked and emotionally was the worst time in this pg for me and I did have many a moment in there where I dreaded the worst happening. My ob is very cautious though and did admit at the time that maybe he was overreacting having me stay in - he and I weren't willing to risk anything though and looking back those 3 weeks did go pretty fast and if that was what it took to get me here now then it was well worth it! Lots of women don't need any bedrest at all or only need to take it easy at home, so as you said, think positive! I hope that you are one of those women :pray:
Luke was our first child so not having any other live children has certainly made it easy for me to rest up and concentrate solely on this pg - I imagine having other children at home would make it a lot harder, but even so, yes we plan to go back for 1 more pregnancy after this one. Not any time soon though; I need to recover from the stress of this pg first!! I have read that some women find that the next pg after a stitch is often better because the cervix has some scar tissue which helps toughen it up. Not sure if that is true but it sounds good ;)
Do you have any other children?

My sister is having her 19 week scan in about 15 mins and I am not letting my mobile out of my sight until I hear that all is good. For her, all she can think about is finding out if she is having a boy or girl, but all I can think about is whether that little bub is all healthy and well. I'm sure it will all be good :pray:

Thanks ALM,

You are right - it soudns as if you made the right choice and if it meant getting here, then what else could you do.

I have a fab OB who comes highly recommended and is a high risk specialist working out of the Freemasons. Dr Stephen Cole. Not sure if you have heard of him. Anyhow, I am going to meet with him in a couple of weeks and we'll obviously discuss the plan ahead. I am DEFINITELY getting the stitch put in and I actually plan to go on bed rest from that point on. Just till 30 weeks. It seems dramatic but there isn't anything I wouldn't do to have this child come home with me - so if that is what it takes, then I'm doing it! I just couldn't bare the thought of being in hospital again and having the waiting game start. Who knows, it might still happen but I want to do my darndest for it not to.

I don't have any living children either, and like you, would like to have at least two. I personally would love three but I have to get to 1 first ;)

Thanks again for your advice, it is much appreciated.

Love Joselyn. xx

Just a quick post about todays OB appt:
My OB is off to New Zealand for a conference for 4 days and it is just before my EDD of April 4.
So..
next Monday March 23 as well as doing another growth scan he will also check for cervical ripeness. If that doesn't set things off (it did with Nic and he arrived that night) then on Tuesday afternoon/evening he will insert the double balloon thingy and then Wednesday morning at 8am break the waters and hopefully deliver Daniel during the course of the day. All of this is only if he doesn't arrive by his own steam before then.
So between March 23-25 we are having our baby.

I don't understand the new way of measuring engagement which is a measure out of 5 but he is 3/5 so if anyone can explain that one for me :)

Oh Judy, not lng now, xoxoxo

Hi guys! I completely lost track of my thread subscriptions so I've been AWOL for a week. But now I'm all read-up again and know how you are. Welcome, Joselyn! We understand that you can't fully accept this pregnancy yet. Unfortunately it's going to be a while yet, but it will happen gradually and eventually you'll hopefully notice that you feel just fine about it, whether that be in a couple week or in, say, 8 months. :) Luckily, bubs will just keep doing their thing in there even though mom is worried.

Hello to everyone else! Looks like it's be a race to the finish between Jude and Rozzie! :D

Hi flowerchild

I am new to this website and iv just experienced my 3rd miscarriage:redface: and need just to talk to people that have experience this and to see if there are some sore of tests that can be done I should be referred to a specialist soon first miscarraige nov 07 @ 6.5 weeks Sept 08 3 months and have him buried with my dad and just yesterday 5.6 days I have been told to go on fertility plus and just want to get some advise please i am so devasted and I feel like I will never have my little baby I am going to start acupunture and she said if you are starting to have a miscarriage that if you get acupunture done that cant help stop it

Hi Ladies,
It has been so quiet in here!

I just wanted to hear some news from the ladies that are going to have their bubs any day: Judy, Rozzie, Tildy.

Lee, It is great to hear from you. I think you should try for another baby. How much extra work could it really be adding one more?

Jo, It was also great to hear from you. I hope you have been doing well.

I have another growth scan on tuesday with my high risk doctor. He wants to see me more often. I guess I will be switching from an office ultrasound every 2 weeks to an ultrasound with the high risk doctor. As long as someone keeps a close eye on the pregnancy I am happy. I had an office ultrasound early this week and he was still growing great. Working on 3 pounds now, a couple weeks ahead! Clexane really is amazing, I never expected it to work this well for me. I told my DH a couple of weeks ago that he could start thinking about getting a room ready for the baby after my 30 week appt. A HUGE STEP FOR ME. That appt. is getting very close.

Hi Laney! The nursery is a big step, but I think you'll enjoy it and feel stronger for doing it. Your posts seem more confident all the time; I remember that you struggled so much to be positive at the beginning.

I'm still chugging along here. I'm 38+1 today, so it's officially any minute now, though I'm trying to be patient. We just went out for dinner and a movie, and I think it might be the last such adventure for a while. Me and DH, both hobbling back to the car (he's stretched a muscle in his leg), yawning, at 9:15 pm, along the night club street in town that we know won't even start to fill up with people for another hour... yup, we're old, bring on the baby! :lol:

Laney, great news on your boy's growth!!! ultrasounds every 2 weeks will be great for you, you'll get regular reassurance, and in the very unlikely event there's a problem they can pick it up early and do something about it.

You're at the time when you lost Shelby, are you doing OK?

I was about the same stage when we started buying things and looking at the nursery. It is a big step but lots of fun also!!!

four more days from me... can't wait... house is a big mess though so lots to do before then!

love Rozzie

Not long now for a few of us.
Laney the extra scans will be a reassuance.

Tildy yep early nights for me too although DH stays up to settle our 4 yr old.

Rozzie I only have til Monday. So one full day to go. Backache is a real killer and so sharp with teh ctx I get. Big ouchies.
I just want my car cleaned inside and washed inside as well as out now and then all is ready.

Hoping42009baby: I am so sorry for your losses. I also suffered recurring miscarriage but for no known reason. I have had a laparoscopy, hysteroscopy, HSG, all the blood tests under the sun and no known reason. Then when we had given up hope along comes Daniel. I hope you d manage to get some testing done. You will need to see a fertility spciecialst or an RE to hopefully get some answers.

hugs and hope
Jude

How exciting Jude and Rozzie! Can't wait to hear your announcements...

Laney, I am so happy to read your update on your little one. Enjoy getting that nursery set up - you will be needing it this time for sure!

I'm not too far behind you girls - saw my ob yesterday and looks like we are on track for stitch removal plus induction on the 14 April when I will be 38w1d. Bubs is sitting nice and low (3/5) so halfway there and my ob is confident that by 38w she should be set to go, if she doesn't decide to come earlier on her own accord of course ;)

I spent Tuesday day and night in the hospital due to some false labour which was fun...not! I hate being in that hospital after all that bedrest time before. Next time I am there, I want it to be when she is being born! All has been good since so hopefully we won't have any more "practice runs". I ended up going in due to quite strong regular BH, groin pain and lots of bowel movements ( :redface: ) - the CTG showed some cx but they didn't really escalate & eventually fizzled out with some panadol and sleeping tablets. I think that was the start of bubs "dropping" as since then my tummy has definitely changed shape and my pelvis feels uncomfortable with weird stretchy pains. She must have a little more room now she is lower too cause I got woken up yesterday with the biggest kick to my ribs - ouch!

Anyway, good luck for Monday Jude and for you too Rozzie later in the week. It's baby time!!! :dance:

hoping42009baby -- I'm sorry I didn't see your post and hopped over it; I don't want you to think I ignored it! I'm sorry to hear of your repeated losses and of the very understandable emotional turmoil that it is causing you. Both BB and Flowerchild are such excellent resources for both information and support. Are you currently trying to get pregnant and/or meeting with a fertility specialist to start some testing?

Jude, in case I don't have another chance to say so before Monday, yay and best of luck! So exciting to get a new baby in here again!

Hi Jude - just popping in to wish you well with your last days of having Daniel on board!!! Looking forward to hearing when I can come up and give him a cuddle - this could well sway my decision for 'just one more' you know!!!! I hope you have a beautiful birth, and all goes very smoothly!!! Take care, and see you soon xox

hoping42009baby, sorry I missed your post as well. The only thing I can suggest is you make sure you do a lot of research on the causes of recurrent miscarriage so you can make sure that they properly test you for everything. I've not experienced the same thing so I can't offer you personal advice, but I've done a lot of research and just wanted to reassure you that for most medical causes of recurrent miscarriages there are effective treatments available. I hope your fertility specialist is someone you trust and who you can ask lots of questions because understanding the issues can be a big help.

I would also suggest you read the sticky on recurrent miscarriage in the TTC after late loss/recurrent miscarriage thread.

Good luck,

Rozzie.

And good luck Jude for Monday!!! only 2 more sleeps!!!

Hi Ladies

Just popping in to check on our expecting mums! Gosh it's getting close now! Thinking of you!

Hoping42009baby...we have travelled the recurrent mirscarriage journey and found so much support and information here on BB. Pop into the ttc after recurrent miscarriage and late loss thread...sorry I don't know how to do a link for you. If you search in that section you will find some great information regarding all the testing you can have done. My advice for what it's worth...push to have the tests now...enduring the loss of a child is too hard...why wait any longer for info than you have to...may save yourself more heartbreak. But please, please have hope...it took us ten years...we gave up on IVF and then our little miracle happened out of the blue!

As for us...well it's all a blur lol! I think Anika is sleeping and eating well but being a first time mum I don't really know...but she's here and she's safe and I look at her every day and thank God she is here...can't wait to for you girls to feel the same! Exxx

my goodness, I cannot believe Anika is almost a month old already!!! time flies.

any more pics for us Ellie?

No baby this week unless nature steps in. His head was not as engaged as last week so he will not induce. With a gap in front of his head there is the worry of cord prolapse if membreanes break with no head against the cervix. If he did the balloon technique then the balloon could push his head even further away and he could flip transverse or breech so... we have an appt for next Tuesday morning and see what happens then. the only good news is that the cervix is soft and ready to go.... but is also high and closed at the moment as there is no head putting pressure on it to open it.
Nothing about this pg has been easy so why on earth did I think the end would be easy.
His EDD is Annabelles Angelversary so I get the feeling he is waiting to arrive on her day.
sorry for the me post, just a bit wel ok a lot disappointed.
Jude

Jude, I'm sorry. it sounds like your doc is being very attentive and cautious so that is good. hopefully Daniel decides on his own to make an appearance soon!

barring unforeseen circumstances Lan should post a BA for me tomorrow :)

Jude, I'm sorry to hear the big day you were expecting has been postponed. :( Of course it's good to hear they're taking every precaution for Daniel's safety, but I understand that you're disappointed. We'll have to wait it out together now!

I'm so looking forward to getting out of bed tomorrow and seeing Rozzie's BA; a benefit of being 10 hours behind you guys!

Jude - Sorry your day was disappointing. Will keep you in my thoughts. Looking forward to your BA when it happens.

Rozzie - Good Luck - can't wait!!!!!

Tildy - Can't wait for your announcement too!!! It is all so exciting that you have all reached the end and it is only a matter of days!!!

I feel like I have sooooooo far to go!!! I have been MIA as I have been in a bit of a denial stage - trying to pretend I am not pg as I just seem to get stressed out when I think about it and how far we have to go still.

Take care all you VERY SOON to be moms!!!

Oh Jude, have been stalking to hear any news of you today. I know these last weeks/days are so hard, every day seems like an eternity. Things can change so quickly in pregnancy - Daniel could engage within the hour and be born tomorrow!! I was induced with Remy, and went from 3 to 10cm within 20 minutes!! What a good girl she was! Hang in there Jude, Daniel wants to arrive in his own good time, don't rush him too much, whats another week (easy for the non-pregnant one to say I know!!). Try to rest and enjoy having Daniel all to yourself for these last few days, you'll never be pregnant with him again!!! I'll keep stalking!!! Hugs, Lee x

Hi Ladies,

Jude, I am sorry that you are going to have to wait a few more days. Is the doctor going to check you again in a couple of days to see if his head is a bit lower?

Rozzie, I can't believe it is time already! I will be stalking all day tomorrow. Can't wait to see some pictures.

Hi laney, my OB said he will check the cervix again next Tuesday and see where Daniel is at but I can't see things being any different. Samuel was not enageged when eh was induced with one dose of prostin and his head never actually hit the cervix until about 5 mins before he was born from a 7 hr labour! But my OB has since done research that says you should NOT use prostin after a previous c sec even though my scar has been proven to hold. So as my body has no idea what natural spontaneous labour is I can just see Daniel being late and being a c sec coz he never engages. Just the way I see it all happening.

Rozzie baby time hun.. can't wait to hear and see pics when you get time :)

Lee I have your ph number programmed in :) How is Remy?

Theresa how are you faring?

wanted on the ph.. typical
Jude

Hi Jude

I am okay - still struggling with acceptance. I feel awful as I should be so grateful that I am pg. I wish I could find some way to bond but I am so scared to. I guess it will happen.

Hope you are doing okay and that you don't ave to wait too much longer.

Does anyone have any news about Rozzie?

hi ladies!

we are home from the hospital. I am proud to announce the arrival of Henry Edward Brown, who came into the world on 24 March, screaming at 8 1/2 lbs with a full head of dark hair.

bub is doing lovely and feeding well. will post some pics soon (we have many thanks to proud Dad!).

love Rozzie

:leap: YIPPPEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well done Rozzie!!!!!! :leap:

Welcome to this world little Henry! You are so loved and so awaited - may life be a joy for you sweet boy! :hug:

My Eva was 5 on the 24th of March - enjoy your babymoon Rozzie!

CONGRATULATION ROZZIE!!!!!!

Welcome little Henry. That is just the news I needed to day!!!

:happyforyou::happyforyou: