Hi all, just wanted to make myself known to you lovely amazingly strong ladies. i've been reading this thread for a few days and was unsure whether to post.

We lost our son on new years eve at 39 weeks. As of yesterday we were shocked to discover that we are pregnant again. I'm not sure how i feel about it yet.....we had no intentions of trying again for a few months and did our best to avoid getting pregnant, yet here we are again. I feel scared, guilty and a little embarrased....but there is some happiness in there which i'm grateful for, i would hate to deny our next baby any of the excitement and joy that it should get from us.

We were lucky to get some answers on what happend to our son Ethan, they found that some of the placenta had died most likely from a blood clot. They also found that he had some development problems with his brain so if he had survived he would have had 'significant learning disabilities'. Finding answers has made it easier to cope with the loss of him but it doesn't seem to be calming my fears too much right now. The blood tests i had done at the time showed that my blood clotting was fine but i have to get further tests done in april to completely rule it out.

So thats my story. We haven't yet told anyone....i'm pretty sure that we are only four weeks along....off to the docs next week for confirmation. So i guess i just needed to tell someone....thanks for listening xx