Need help, Daddy is not coping well, advise please :-(

[Traveller]

You are going through a period of adjustment, not just physically but in your relationship too. Personally I feel it is very important to lay the ground rules out now unless you want to be caring for a baby and a grown man in 6 months time.

Sit down with him, and explain how you are feeling. Let him know that you are his partner and as such expect to be supported in your pregnancy, and in your joint decision to raise a child together. It will only get harder as the months go on if he wants a maid and lover instead of a life partner so let him know now what you expect. If he loves you (and I'm sure he does) he will take this new life as an opportunity to step up to the plate and be the partner and father you need.

If that fails then plan B would be to sleep when you feel like it. Ignore his laundry and his meals, unless you happen to be doing your own. He will soon value how much you do and it may force his hand into helping you.

You have my sympathy, I remember how hard it is to be cooking when feeling very ill.

[*LittleMissSummer*]

BIG

I went through a similar thing when i was in the early stages of pregnancy. I had all day sickness from about 5 weeks to about 15 weeks. I would go to work and get home and have to go straight to bed, i was utterly exhausted.

You do need to sit him down and tell him your feelings and say its not him at all your body is going through a big change at the moment, you have so many hormones and feelings running through you at the moment and anything you do or say shouldnt be taken to heart.

[~mamaspice~]

You are going through a period of adjustment, not just physically but in your relationship too. Personally I feel it is very important to lay the ground rules out now unless you want to be caring for a baby and a grown man in 6 months time.

Sit down with him, and explain how you are feeling. Let him know that you are his partner and as such expect to be supported in your pregnancy, and in your joint decision to raise a child together. It will only get harder as the months go on if he wants a maid and lover instead of a life partner so let him know now what you expect. If he loves you (and I'm sure he does) he will take this new life as an opportunity to step up to the plate and be the partner and father you need.

If that fails then plan B would be to sleep when you feel like it. Ignore his laundry and his meals, unless you happen to be doing your own. He will soon value how much you do and it may force his hand into helping you.

You have my sympathy, I remember how hard it is to be cooking when feeling very ill.

:yeahthat: I couldn't have said it better.

[Fleur]

:yeahthat: all of the above.

Can you try & explain to him what is going on here... you are growing a baby, it's a huge toll on your body! maybe give him some reading, pregnancy books or the like that can explain what you are going through (and what's to come for that matter).

He needs to understand he is not going to have you at his beck & call for a long long time to come... better to sort it out sooner than later.

Hugs to you It's a time of adjustment and I hope it passes soon for you and you can move together into the next phase of your relationship.

ETA - just thought I'd add, it's worth keeping in mind I guess that it can be a stressful time for men emotionally as well, sometimes the idea of another person to care for & feed etc is a bit daunting in the beginning.
As Traveller said, you need to sit down & talk with him about how you are feeling & it might be an opportunity for him too if he's feeling a bit out of sorts.

[willow5]

Every one has given you great advice, I don't think there's a lot I can add, except maybe to SLAP HIS MOTHER! I say that with humour, BUT! Mothers really should think about the future when they mollycoddle their precious boys to the point of them being spoilt and hopeless as a partner!

for you I was very sick when pg with DS3 I know how you feel it's horrible! I think you're doing a great job, here's hoping your DP gets it together to look after you soon

[Smoke Jaguar]

Power trip?? Ahhhh, he doesn't like that he knows he will have to step up very soon and have to serve YOU! That's not a power trip, hun, that's being looked after while you do very important, largely invisible work. He is resisting.
Just so you know, you can do the rest of this journey without him - lots of BB chicks do better by ditching the excess baggage. Hopefully, though, your DP can get over himself and grow up.