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Thread: babys father +me not married..wat happens wit babys lastname

  1. #1
    SarahMc Guest

    Default babys father +me not married..wat happens wit babys lastname

    i am about to have my 1st child and am unsure of what my babys last name should be as myself and the babys father are not married yet however we do plan to get married soon.

    i dont want our baby to just have my last name but i dont want it to be just the fathers last name either,

    so will his name just automatically be both of our last names since we are not married or will we have to figure out how to put both our last names as our baby boys lastname on the birth certificate?

    im just a little confused on how the last name thing works if ur not married


  2. #2

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    Hi Sarah,

    You can do whatever you like. If you just want your last name or DP's last name or combine them - it's up to you and your call.

    I've always said that my children would have my DH's last name even if we weren't married but that's just me.

    Have a think about it and see what you want to do. Can you maybe use your last name as a middle name for your child? Just a thought.

    I hope you can decide.

  3. #3
    skyelar Guest

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    Hi Sarah!

    My now DH & I weren't married when my DD was born. In the hospital she had to use my last name on her bassinet/ankle & wrist bands in case we were separated in an emergency etc.

    On her birth certificate she has my DH's last name (we are now married so it is mine as well).

    My step daughter has her Mum & Dad's last name hyphenated.

    I guess it is up to you!

    HTH

  4. #4

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    DP and I were not married (and still arent!) when Aidyn was born.

    I decided to give Aidyn his fathers lastname... just because it didnt really bother me that much, and I knew it would be special to DP for his son to have his lastname... And we both have long surnames, so it would have looked silly to try and hyphenate and combine them!

  5. #5

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    My children that DP and I have togather have both last names with a hyphen. I was quite happy to give them just my last name, but DP kicked up a stink ...lol.
    My 1st DD has only my last name

    Tanya

  6. #6

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    We're married but have different surnames, our boys both have our names, hyphenated.

    Legally, in Victoria, if the parents can't agree, the surname is a hyphenated one with the first surname alphabetically, first in the hyphenated name. Hope that makes sense.

  7. #7
    mizzsocial Guest

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    Im not married, and my son has my last name..

  8. #8
    Fraser Guest

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    I am married but didn't change my surname (too much paperwork!!) but I am going to try and sneak my surname in as a middle name - so bubs will have DH's surname but then an extra middle name

    have to admit DH isn't very happy about this, he wants only his surname involved, but that's because he's a caveman and feels the innate need to re-populate the earth in his own image or something.....

    I do have concerns about when Bubs goes to school and we have different surnames but I really just can't bring myself that change my surname, that's my name, it's been my name for the last 30 years. Who knows maybe I'll feel differently after he's born.

    Do what you feel comfortable with

    Em

  9. #9

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    DD#1 has a different Father & so she has my surname, she uses DH's surname at school & on almost everything, the only things she uses my surname on still are legal doc's Medicare card & her passport, everything else she is our married surname!!!!

    DD#2 is Dh's (our) married surname!!!

    So bubs can still have Mum's surname legally like on Birth cert, passports, medicare etc, but be enrolled at school, kinder etc, etc as DP's surname?!

  10. #10

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    Its up to you what surname you give to your child. You can always change it by deed poll or whatever when you get married.
    Some friends of mine had their son when they werent married and have given him both of their surname hyphenated.

  11. #11
    LouLou7 Guest

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    It's up to you (if you can both agree!).

    I'm married but didn't change my name. Our bubba will have DH's surname. He didn't care either way but I sort of felt it should be that way (just personal opinion).

    I know from my MIL's experience though in NSW, if you decide to give your bubba your DP's surname and then decide in a few years time to change it to your surname, you will need DP's permission until your child is 18.

  12. #12

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    We weren't married when DD was born however I chose that she should have her father's surname. When we got married 6 months later, I didn't change my surname at all. When DS was born, he too got DH "The Family" surname. I still have my 'birth surname' because that's who I am!

    Divvy, interesting to see what the actual law states. Thanks

  13. #13

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    have to admit DH isn't very happy about this, he wants only his surname involved, but that's because he's a caveman and feels the innate need to re-populate the earth in his own image or something.....
    ROFPMSL that just cracks me up!!!

    DP & I aren't married or engaged either. Emerson will be taking DP's family name. I had been thinking of adding in my last name as a middle name but it doesn't really go so I'm not going to. We also did consider a hyphenated name but once again it didn't really go otherwise I may have given it more thought! I'm a bit of a traditionlist in this sense I guess. But it is each to their own!

  14. #14

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    My older two children took their birth fathers surname. I kinda felt that if they didnt it would be like he wasnt "owning" them..sounds silly but yeah...hindsight being what it is.. i would have given them my name. When I married my DH after two years we hypenated the girls name with our married name so they werent losing their roots so to speak but were acknowledging our new family status. Like a poster has already mentioned..we did need their birth fathers permission to change their surname. We did find that until their names were changed legally no schools would use the new name...though that may vary state to state.

    Jo

  15. #15

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    Dp and i arn't married, and both of our boys have his surname, this baby will have his surname too so when we do get married, i just need to change my name.

  16. #16
    DoubleK Guest

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    i actually posted up a few months ago with the same problem!

    everyone has told me its completely up to us what we want to do... i am leaning more towards giving our daughter my partners last name...

    regardless if we ever marry or not (i would like to think we will one day!) i would rather her have his name, than have her have my name, then us get married and have to change her name as well... it gets too complicated i think!!

  17. #17

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    When I had my kids I chose to give them my surname instead of their fathers, long story about that!
    After I married my DH, we had a discussion about this and we chose to use his surname for his children and later on we would change the others to his surname.
    Lately though we are pushing more towards changing everyone's name to my maiden name, there are a lot of reasons for that as well!
    It's totally up to the individual though.

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