Hi

Not sure if this is the right place, but i couldn't find a category that seemed to fit.

I was birth partner for my sister in law where her baby was born with the cord around her neck, not breathing and ended up on life support for a week.

Life support was turned off, but the baby had other ideas, and is now a gorgeous 1.5 year old who is crawling and doing great.

I have now realised that her birth has really affected me, and i am now ***** scared of getting pregnant bc i am so scared of giving birth.

the silence when the bub was born was deafening and horrible and something no one should have to hear.

i was up the head end with the mum, and i was reassuring her whilst i could see that bub was not doing good and they were doing cpr. mum wasn't aware of everything that was happening.

i don't know what my options are cos i would really like to have my own baby, but that experience is almost haunting me, and stopping me from moving on.

i was so looking forward to being at the birth, and it was not the experience that any of us expected.


k