I went to the doctor today and she was concerned that I did not have any clots when I was bleeding, she checked my cervix and it was closed so she sent me for an ultrasound and I have had a complete miscarriage, there is nothing left . I went in knowing that I had lost my baby but when I layed on that bed and they put the probe on my belly my mind expected to see a baby on the screen, but there was nothing

I have spoken with DH a little but we will talk further, I think I would like to wait until February to try again, spend the summer with my girls being able to jump on the trampoline with them and all those fun things, while also trying to rid my body of everything that could possibly harm another baby (I do not drink or smoke, I mean artifical foods/pesticides etc and take the required vitamins for a good length of time - which upsets me a little because I am careful about what goes into my body most of the time), then hopefully I can conceive the healthy baby I dream for.

Thankyou for your support and thoughts again, it is lovely to know I have people thinking of me in such a difficult time