thanks everyone

i just want to put it out there that i have an "interesting" relationship with my mum - until recently, she's shown myself and DH little to no respect to the point i cut her out of my life for about 3 months until she could show me that she would treat me with respect. it took a lot for me to get her to understand i'm not a child - yes, i'm her child, but i'm an adult that deserves to be treated as such

as a result, even though i have dinner with her every week (to try and work on things), our relationship is still on a rocky footing. i don't want her touching me or making this pregnancy "hers" which she has tried to do in the past - it's not about her. but at the same time, i don't want to alienate her

when my niece took her hands away, bub stopped kicking, so it wouldn't have made much difference today i don't think...

thanks for your input - i want mum to be part of this - but on my terms, not hers kwim?