"Push" Gifts

[little_O]

Personally I find the whole concept a bit tacky and distasteful.

Why on earth would you expect to be given a material reward for bringing a little soul into the world.

Carrying a child and giving birth isn't a job which requires reward or payment. It is a blessing and a privilege. Surely it is reward enough in itself.

Wasn't intending to offend anyone by asking. I was just curious because my SIL got them both times from my Brother, My Mum had never heard of the idea.

I am not personally fussed either way if he was to give me one, but i would like to give him a gift as a thank you for all he has done to help out and his support for me. I think its a special occasion for him and sometimes the dad's get forgotten.

I feel any gift given out of obligation is a load of rubbish. But its nice to hear how everyone is different

If a DH wants to give his wife something for bringing his child into the world i think thats nice too.

[OceanPrincess]

I also have to say I'm slightly jealous of all these spunky gifts

DH is getting me an eternity ring, but I think that's different. He has always planned on getting one for me and since he missed the first wedding anniversary, which is the traditional time to give an eternity ring, he's going to wait until we have stopped having kids, which is the other traditional time I think. Don't think that really counts..? Dunno.

[~me~]

The eternity ring is either first anniversary or first baby. This being that in the 'old' days, most had a baby in their first year of marriage and it was a guess/race as to which came first That's my understanding.

I have never heard of a push gift. No gifts exchanged at the birth of our babies, didn't bother me one bit.

[OceanPrincess]

The eternity ring is either first anniversary or first baby. This being that in the 'old' days, most had a baby in their first year of marriage and it was a guess/race as to which came first That's my understanding.

LOL, DH is way off then

[little_O]

LOL, DH is way off then

haha you definitely need 2 for that!!....That being said my mum thought it was second child, but 3 children later still nothing...then the 15th anniversary she got one!! At leats your DH is quicker than that

[~me~]

I'll expand on the tradition. It apparently came about as couples did not have sex before marriage and birth control was not really around or was not readily available or reliable. So if you were successful or your body was ready, you got pregnant on your wedding night or usually the next month, the eternity ring was to celebrate the fact the a baby meant you were together for eternity symbolising ever lasting love or if no baby, you made it to one year of marriage and again symbolising eternity

All a bit of fun really.

[Party-of-five]

I had never heard of a push present until yesterday at a baby shower had a bit of a giggle about it

[Loveinamist]

I'll expand on the tradition. It apparently came about as couples did not have sex before marriage and birth control was not really around or was not readily available or reliable. So if you were successful or your body was ready, you got pregnant on your wedding night or usually the next month, the eternity ring was to celebrate the fact the a baby meant you were together for eternity symbolising ever lasting love or if no baby, you made it to one year of marriage and again symbolising eternity

All a bit of fun really.

Which puritanical society was it where noone was having sex before marriage? Not ours surely? People have been having sex before marriage for eons...they just didn't talk about it! There were a hell of a lot of very healthy full term looking prem babies though!

[MummyNaomi]

I bought DH a lovely watch prior to DSs birth to symbolise him becoming a father - its now engraved with "I Love You Daddy" with DSs DOB and DH has already told DS that on his 18th birthday the watch will be handed down.

I have told DH that for my birthday this year (same month as my due date) I would love a piece of jewellery to symbolise our daughters birth in exactly the same way, and also because I would like to have something to pass down to her on her 18th

Not a 'push' present as such, but certainly presents around the time of birth so they may be considered that way!

[Silver Bell]

yep that's right, eternity ring is given at first year or first born so I think the term 'push present' was given to the gift if you have already gotten your eternity ring... not everyone follows this tradition though and its up to the couple involved... I think its nice that your partner gives you something sentimental for going through those 9 months (well 10) and going through all the pain of labour... but each to their own

[Ambersky]

I got my Eternity ring when DD1 was born.. but no gift or expectation of one for DD2.

[Rouge]

Naw. I think it's cute. Dunno if I'd use the term "push" present though LOL.

I got perfume from DH when DD was born. DS I don't think I got anything but wasn't really expecting anything. TBH.

I think the thing to remember is everyone's love language is different, and I know a lot of people who celebrate things with gifts, others do it with food, others do it in their own way. There is no "wrong" it's just what you see to be as important

[Manhattan]

Never heard of it, and I wouldn't expect a present, and neither would dh. Bubs was present enough for both of us, and a costly enough experience as it was, without purchasing lavish gifts. I also think there are already plenty of other times for presents (birthdays, anniversarys, mothers/fathers day, christmas) so why not make the birth of your baby just about the baby.

That's just what I think though, I, like the next girl love presents, so you do what is right for your family.

[Gigi]

i thought PUSH presents were for celebrities or well off people. (not my world).
(but with the amount of celebs who have elective c-sections, maybe the wording needs to be changed).

i ended up pushing for 29 hours, then ambo, then hospital for 7 hours, then emergency c - so i didn't "push" in the end, so maybe that's why i didn't get a push present, although i didn't expect one. After waiting so long, so hard to conceive, i was just relieved to have a live baby to term.

At the time, so much went wrong, i assumed at least my then DH would turn up the next day with flowers - to celebrate that DD and me both survived the ordeal of labour. But no, nothing. Then a flower arrangement turned up, i thought it would be from DH, but no, it was from his work (i knew nobody there). That did it, i bawled. So people who didn't know me, bought me lovely flowers, and my own dh, couldn't be bothered, was not interested in celebrating our DD's arrival and survival (after an initial APGAR of 2), after taking photos of her arrived not breathing, being told by med staff to take photos of her being resussed, cos it might be the only photos he would get. AFter all that - nothing.

it was a big deal to me.

we spent the baby bonus (slowly) on replacing whitegoods, baby stuff, bills. really grateful for it.

[AngelPants]

no but most people i know did get one of some kind. i think its traditional to get an eternity ring on birth of the first son, or the first wedding anniversary.... something like that anyway!