I had Izzy at 935 - by C/S and the IL's and my parents knew right away so as I was being wheeled back from recovery with Izzy they were all there! Far out - I would change that for sure. It would be nice to have 5 mins to get myself sorted and be with my baby after the shock of a c/s and all, but that's life. We didn't have too many visitors the first day even though it was a Saturday - probably because I had a c/s and then on the Sunday I had a full house! I didn't really mind though, I just rested and chatted quietly to them all.
My hospital has very strict visiting hours this time around (different place) and even family won't be able to just waltz in thank goodness, so we can have some time after bubs is born.... My mum and dad will have Izzy though so I would imagine they would come in pretty early with her so we can all say hello to this little man as a family.
It really is up to you and although now you might feel like you would like visitors (or not) you might change your mind. I would recommend that the first few hours at least are yours alone so you can have some lovely snuggles, breastfeed and just stare for a while before everyone wants a cuddle!
Lucky for me I had a quick labour at night, we got to the hosy aroun 9:50-9:30, bubs was born at 10:37pm, and our families were in the country, so we didn't have visitors to the next day and we said they could only come during visiting hours from 1pm. Bub was in SCBU and you can't visit there between 1-2pm,. but as I was by myself and not with bubs, the visitors were good.
I found it hard when I transferred hospitals to the private one I was supposed to birth in cos bubs was in the room with me and everyone just wanted to help, and then the day after getting out there I had about 10 people and they were all very excited and all wanted to hold bubs and it was too much for me!! I was still getting used to having her with me and I didn't have control of the situation and DH didn't realise until later the effect it had on me. So he had to teel them to back off a bit, always getting messages asking how I was feeling how bubs was doing etc, and I was just trying to focus on bubs, establishing feeding, she was still being gavage fed, so expressing a lot as well, was a very difficult time!
It will come down to how you feel at the time, the MW's are always happy to tell people to go away , make sure you and your DH are on the same page, and take control of the situation enjoy those first few hours to yourselves, you only get them once!!
I sent out txt msgs to let ppl know what day I would be having the baby but added '..you are welcome to visit from...' and left myself a couple of days to recover. To satiate their curiosity we also sent txts to let them know he had been born and all the details, soon after the birth. That way ppl were less keen to come to the hospital to check him out. I had Nate on Thursday and told ppl to come from Saturday. We're lucky I guess that none of our parents are here but both my sisters visited that first day.
Before he was born though, I made it very clear to hubby that he was not to take the baby out to meet visitors before I'd left recovery. I even told him to refuse my over-bearing older sister (not that he had to in the end but I just wanted to be prepared).
Most ppl mean well but forget how stressful a situation it can be.
hi hippy
We waited about 24hrs but we had a different situation as we lived rural and didnt have family close by, By the 24 hr mark i was bored stiff as DH has gone back to work 16 hrs after dd was born and was happy for a visitor! lol
As for family we had a 6 week rule. As they would be flying and staying with us in our 2 bedroom house we said - no more than 2 people at a time and we wanted 6 weeks to ourselves to get into routine before having family vacationing at our house. We are happy we did this !
Now living close to family we will not be saying when we are in labour and probably still have 1 night to ourselves in hospital (or home - hoping to go home after 6 hours before family are to visit).
I think it is important to set boundaries (if you are having them) well before bub is born so people arent offended at the time!
But in saying that everyone is different. I know my sister was asking family to come up straight away.... so each to their own
My sis had her first bub at about 1am, and within a couple of hours I, my mum and other siblings were there to visit - she wanted to show him off! But, she was still a bit knocked out from the epidural and trying to feed, so nobody held him at that stage (even her DH hadn't held him yet). We were back again after lunch the next day. She had told friends to wait until day 2, but decided at the time she was happy to see them in the afternoon.
I like to think that people will respect what you decide (as my sister's friends did), but I know that's not always going to be the case. Just be strong in whatever you decide, and if you do tell them to wait, you can always change your mind if you want to. It's probably easier for them to expect to have to wait and then be allowed in sooner than the other way around.
I think our first visitors came about 12 hours after the birth (Caty was born at 11.56pm) but they'd asked first and were considerate about how long they stayed which was great. Then I had a workmate just rock up and walk into my room which I was so not impressed at (spesh since she had some guy I'd never met in tow) but I don't think she stayed that long.
I would suggest texting your baby news to everyone who needs to know then finishing the text with 'we're turning the mobile off now so I can bond with my bubs - which means no visitors for x amount of time'. When you put it like that I think all sensible people will respect your wishes. Oh, and dont' forget to actually turn off the mobiles! Why hsould you have to answer them just cos they ring I say!
You know, I did not mind the ppl visiting that much .. DD were in NICU, so they were not allowed to bother her, but I was fine. My parents and IL's and sisters and BIL waited in the waiting room while I had my emergency c/s. I remember DH coming in while I was still groggy (I was under general) and showing me a cellphone video of dd and I remember that my mom and dad were there also.
I HATED being called on the phone, ppl coming to visit were fine. I liked the conversation and the chance to just sit still. But reaching for my phone were HELL!
This time .. if everything goes according to plan, I won't mind my family visiting me right after at all, actually I'll ask for it. I'll ask the friends to come the day after, but the family would be just as excited and curious to see the new bubba ... I will however next time leave my cell at home and asked that no calls, except the daddy, be put throught to my room.
Reply With Quote
, make sure you and your DH are on the same page, and take control of the situation enjoy those first few hours to yourselves, you only get them once!!
Bookmarks