I am desperatly wanting to have a third child some where down the track maybe in 18 months to 2 years time. The problem is my husband doesn't know if he does. He has told me not to get rid of our baby stuff and just to store it away in case.
Everytime it comes up we have a big fight. He keeps saying "if you asked me now I would say no I'm happy with the two we have, if you asked me in 12 months-2years I would say I don't know". I just keep thinking I will get my hopes up just to be told no when the time comes, and I can't stop thinking about it. It's on my mind all day long and I keep telling myself to let it go for now and deal with it when the time comes, but I can't seem to stop thinking about it.
I had this issue with my DP after my 1st baby... It wasnt until we thought we couldnt have kids again that he realised he wanted another... At that time we spoke of several kids but now after #2 he's a bit reserved once again. I think men take a lot longer to see what they want.You said you;d like a third in 18 months to 2 yrs...Maybe by this time your DH will have a clear idea in his head about what he wants... I'd suggest enjoying the 2 for now and taking things slowly for now so you dont get your hope up for nothing.
Going through it right now DD was a more difficult newborn (cried more) than DS and has scared DH off any more. But he does occassionally talk about a 3rd, so I'm trying to convince him. hehe.
One thing I had to keep reminding DH of when going for #2 was that DS would be much older by the time the baby arrived. I'm sure in his mind he puts another baby into our current situation, so I'm working on telling him how different things would be in another years time. DS would be at preschool one day a week and nearly 4 yrs old, and DD would be a toddler too. It would be completely different to having all 3 right now, if that makes sense.
DH knows how much I want #3 and I think he would cave for me, but he needs to be ok with it, because we have had bonding issues with DD coz he couldn't stand her screaming. Thankfully he's seeing a more playful side to her lately and I could see a little sparkle in his eye with her the other day which was lovely to see. So hopefully once he's fully in love with his daughter he'll be happier to have #3.
Good luck. At least you don't have a definite no. Something to work on
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