Sending you big eevee. I know how you feel, I was a basket case for the entire first half of my pregnancy and lived for each scan.

The good thing was that my anxiety decreased considerably after my 20 wk scan. I know two weeks feels like an eternity, but once you have that scan I would think you'll feel a lot less anxious.

I would go with Mildez's suggestion of seeing if one of your midwives can use a doppler to find your baby's heartbeat. I had this done one day when I was almost crying with anxiety that something had happened to my baby. The one warning she gave me was that sometimes early on they can't find the heartbeat with a doppler, so only have the doppler if I could cope with them being unable to find a heartbeat.

Do you have an OB? I wonder if s/he could fit you in for a super quick scan between now and your 20 week scan, just to see the heartbeat. I would call and explain how anxious you are and see if there's anything they can do for you.

The other good thing is that once you get through the next few weeks, you will start to feel your baby moving around, that was the main thing that kept my anxiety at bay to a certain extent.

I really feel for you hun, I've been there and it was a very difficult time.

I hope someone can help you out.

xxx