I was exactly the same this time. After four losses one after the other, when the nurse from the FS called to say I had a BFP I think she was a little surprised at my very non-excited response. I was offered counselling because they knew how hard it would be for me to get through the early stages of the pregnancy. It wasn't until I went in for my scan at 7 weeks to check viability and we saw the heart beat that I realised how much I had been holding in - managed to get out of the clinic and then basically collapse against DH with so much emotion and relief.

I think its just self preservation to be honest. You've had a hard road and your body and mind are doing the best they can to protect you. I hope you have a beautiful sticky bubba on board, and time passes quickly so you get to see that reassuring heartbeat.