Nic, I just wanted to send you a huge- you sound just like me after DS was born. I wanted him so badly but wasn't prepared for it to be so hard the second time around. He wasn't a great sleeper to begin with, he was good at night doing 3-4 hour blocks but day times he was a very restless sleeper and it nearly did my head in. Looking back though, I wish i'd just gone with the flow more than I did and waited for it to get better (and it did!) - I'm not a 'go with the flow' kinda girl though to be honest! I got so stressed about it all that I ended up so anxious I started having panic attacks.
After talking to a psychologist (yeah, I was that much of a mess) I realised that the reason I was feeling so bad was because I'd wanted him so badly, went through so much crap to have him that I thought bringing him home would be smooth sailing, all the hard times behind us....but someone forgot to give DS that memo! He was and is just a baby, brand new to the world and he just needed his mummy!
I thought that because I'd done this before, that it'd be a piece of cake! I'd know how to handle sleeping issues (DD wasn't so great to start with either but with a bit of work ended up being a fantastic sleeper). What I didn't take into account was that DS hadn't done this before!
I PROMISE you, no matter how hard you're finding it now, and probably thinking he will never sleep and you'll never get your life back...it DOES get better!! DS has improved out of sight. We've had the usual hurdles of teething and illness but on the whole, he sleeps great during the day now. He still doesn't sleep through the night, but he does sleep well at night - quick feed and straight back to sleep. I'm just used to it now and have accepted that he's not his sister, he's his own little person and he'll sleep through when he's ready.
It's a tough gig this motherhood...and those early weeks are a killer. Hang in there babe, you're not alone, I felt exactly the same as you are now and am here to support you!
Ok...sorry, that was a bit of a ramble but Nic's post just reminded me so much of our early days. Hope all are well. We're doing good, DS sick with another cold at the moment but still pretty good.
PS - have done a total 360 on having another baby. Just not ready AT ALL to go back to that newborn stage now that things are getting so much easier with DS and not sure I want to do it again at all....so that is on the backburner for now....I guess I'll need to start thinking about it again after DS turns one, wouldn't want a smaller age gap than that in any event.
Bookmarks