Hi ladies
I make this post with much sadness & heartache. My scan on friday showed my precious bub had passed away. My worst fears..again. This is my 4th m/c now and am very quickly losing all hope that i will ever be a mum. I have had so many tests done last time and i have positive ANA (antinuclear antibodies) & NK cells, am really starting to think this is my problem and i fear i will keep on killing our poor babies. I feel like such a failure. I was on all the right drugs, clexane, prednisone, progesterone etc...just dont know what else to do?
If anyone has any good stories of success after multiple losses would love to hear them. I know it does happen, but i'll never know if it will happen for me. Dont know what to think at the moment, i swing from anger to fear to complete dispair. I have to go in for a D&C sometime this week, i am really hating carrying around my dead baby inside me at the moment, i just want it out!
So sorry to be a downer on this thread. I want to thank each & every one of your for your support over the last month and wish you all the very best for continued safe & happy pregnancies.
Hopefully one day i will be back, but for now i need a good break...and a few more good cries
Just wanted to say to Yogi how sorry I am to hear your news. I will be thinking of you, please let yourself grieve as this is a very tough time. Don't give up, there is so much research into recurrent miscarriages - there is nothing 'wrong' with you, you just need to find the right person to help you get the baby you so very, very much deserve. Hugs to you xxx
Yogi bear i am so so sorry for your loss. Its so hard to find words of comfort but i too have a friend who had reoccurring m/c and she had a healthy bub on her fourth pg from having some injection everyday.
CK77- ive known the sex of our baby since before he was transfered, we had PGD IVF due to a sex linked disease i carry. One upside of that is finding out the sex of our embies that make it thru testing.
Tantee - Congrats and welcome you must be over the moon!!! You have come to the right place all the girls in here are wonderful and we can all relate to those first few weeks before you see the blob and the heart beat!!
Tantee, congratulations!
I really can relate. It has been nearly 4 years for us as well and I also had a lap in March this year (diagnosing & removing moderate endo).
It's a nerve-wracking time, but such a hopeful one too (for me, I was like, well, I'd much rather stress about this than IVF stuff). It does seem surreal at times.
Take is easy, just one day at a time (there's no other way) and hope that time does fly til your scan. I also think a lot of time sleeping and spoiling yourself too is good, eg doing just what you want, movies, trashy magazines etc (these are the things I do as a treat). Also, you might not be "over the moon" every day and that's ok too.
Welcome, Tantee! We've all been there ie worrying about the 7-week scan, then the 12-week scan, then the 20-week scan ... So you're definitely in the right place to share your concerns and hopefully have them alleviated. Congratulations!
Worrywort, if you're worried about not being able to take Blackmore's P & BF gel capsules and concerned about missing out on iodine, you could always see your GP and get your thyroid levels tested. It's a simple blood test which will show whether you're in the normal range or not. As I said previously, I have an underactive thyroid and my specialist (endocrinologist) is quite regularly sending me off for blood tests, every two weeks.
Hey Tantee!! Welcome, I'm very new in here too, but just like all the forums everyone's a sweetie.
Jaki80, great news from your nurse, what date is your scan?
I also had another BT...just couldn't help myself and even DH was persuading me. The m/s has been around for about 3 days now. So a week ago the hCG was 933 and today it was 15066!! The receptionist said it was fantastic, but no idea if its high, low or average.
She also explained how they calculate how far gone I am and due date (although she did misread the 'wheel' they use and said, 'you'll be due in January' !!! I laughed and said, I don't think so :-) )
I had a natural FET so they take the date of transfer and just add 2 weeks on. So I'm not as far along as I thought. My transfer was on 12th July, 2 weeks before was the 28th June.......so 40 weeks from 28th June is 4th April 2011. Phew! finally worked it out. So I'm 5 weeks and 3 days. Better change the ticker.
Hope everyone is travelling well xx
Last edited by airline; August 5th, 2010 at 03:26 PM.
airlene my scan is tues the 10th.
I had my TF the same day as you. So if my numbers are good then yours are incredible! Maybe its twins!
If you had a natural FET cycle should you not date your pg from the first day of your last period. If you are regular. I get a bit lost too!
Im told with a fresh ivf cycle its EPU + 2 weeks, when i worked out that verse my first day of period it was the exact same.
x
Tantee - welcome and congratulations. I think we all appreciate what it feels like at the beginning, and wishing you a very happy and healthy nine months!
AFM- Got yet another cold this week courtesy of my little 15 month old bug catcher, so am back to laying low (literally) as well as looking after her as she is far sicker than me. I know it's boring hearing about people feeling sick, but I have my fingers crossed that in a couple of weeks my immune system will kick in and I will get my energy and lungs back and be able to be a bit more active in here!
I have been quietly watching and hope that all you ladies are doing well.
I saw a few questions about working out your due date for a FET. To work out your due date, use the day you ovulated ('O' date) minus two weeks as your LMP.
For example, if you had a two day transfer, your 'O' date was two days prior to transfer and therefore your LMP would be your transfer date minus 16 days (14 +2). If you had a 5 day transfer, your 'O' date was 5 days before transfer, then another 14 days before this date, therefore your LMP would be your transfer date minus 19 days. It won't make much of a difference for a 2 day transfer, but for a 5 day transfer (like me), using the transfer date would be almost a week out. Hope this helps - it's logical when it's explained to you so hope this makes sense!
xxx
Last edited by sunshine 11; August 5th, 2010 at 05:54 PM.
Welcome Tantee, and congratulations on your BFP! It is a nervous wait at the start I am getting impatient for my 12 week scan (which I keep forgetting to book by the way blaming this on pregnant brain). Just take one day at a time and hopefully it will go quickly for you - but not so quick that you forget to enjoy it! Have you told any friends or family yet???
Jaki and airline, congrats on the great numbers. Airline is it possible you are having twins?????? That number seems high even though I don't know alot about numbers. I had my blood tests and don't have to see the Dr for a month. She said she would call if there were any concerns and hasn't called, so assuming all is well but now I am keen to see what my 'numbers' were. Might have to drop in and get a copy of my pathology results.
Lairdoz, feeling on the sickness issue. I have finally got over this sinus thing. Then DS decided to get a tummy bug and not sleep for several nights. So feeling quite tired at the moment. Hope you and DD are feeling better soon and you get to rest lots.
And I have worked too much this week and have a busy two weeks ahead. Have decided that working in hosp is a huge sensory overload when preg eg cleaning stuff, hand rub, excrement etc etc. Am just filling in for a while till they get a full time person in position, which I am hoping is sooner rather than later. And today crazy lady tried to make me feel her fake boobs!
I am getting pregnant brain badly. Forgot one of best friends birthdays. Remembered late last night lying in bed. Worst thing was I actually had been texting her and still forgot!
Hope everyones brain holding out better than mine!
yogi, I'm so, so sorry to hear your news. I hope the d&c goes smoothly and that your recovery is quick.
I do know someone who now has a healthy 5mo daughter after several early losses. I think her problem was a clotting disorder, but beyond that I don't know many details because we're not close. I just know she did daily injections throughout the pregnancy. I hope that one day (9 months after you're ready to start trying again) I'll get to share your success story with someone else in a similar position.
So very sorry, YogiBear. I just wanted to echo what Lairdoz said: you aren't doing anything "wrong". This is not your fault. This is just incredibly unfair. I know two women who have had many miscarriages and have eventually had children: my SIL has a one year old girl and my friend has a three year old boy.
Oh YogiBear, I was devastated to read your news, sending you massive hugs Let it all out, give yourself time and space to grieve. The baby you so desperately want and utterly deserve is out there in the universe waiting for you. Don't lose hope.
When you are feeling strong again, maybe get a second opinion about managing the ANA and NK cells. New treatment regimes are being developed all the time.
Take care of yourself sweetie, wishing you a short wait til you get your little miracle.
YogiBear, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. As others have said, many women have recurrent miscariages and go on to have healthy babies. Don't lose hope that you will be one of them. Can I suggest contacting a good grief counsellor to help you through this awful time? Sending you a big hug right now.
CK, Hiya! You must be busy as we haven't heard from you in a while. My babies' crown to rump length couldn't be measured at my morph scan, as the sonographer explained they were now too big to fit on the screen in one view. Did you get C to R lengths at your morph scan? They estimated bubs' weight and both were in the normal range, which is good. I hear you re DTD. It was only this week that we DTD (albeit other pursuits have been explored previously - and sorry if TMI!) After the scan I told my DH I wanted to start buying some baby things to make it all feel real and to try to lessen my fears and make this PG more positive, so we hit Big W sales and bought about 4 bulk packs of Huggies, some swaddles, bibs, pacifiers, bath towels and some gorgeous tiny little rompers and things. So, so cute! We've also been doing our research online and visiting stores for twin prams, cots, changes tables etc. How about you? What have you bought for your baby so far? Enjoy your niece's wedding this weekend. We've also got a wedding on south of Sydney. My best friend is getting married and we're leaving Friday and getting back Sunday, treating it as a mini babymoon
Renee, You've done extremely well to make it this far and have only one crack-up. I've lost count of the number I've had. It's either a raging temper or tears with me ATM
Airline, Hang in there. I had no MS my whole PG and know how you feel when you don't feel PG. Wait till your boobs swell and become tender (they were my only sign for ages)and everyone else in my BB buddies group felt movement before me, but then comes the time when you feel those magical flutters and kicks.
GlennyC, Glad your talk with your boss went well. Excellent news you can play it by ear and don't have to give him 10 weeks notice. At my work I have to give 10 weeks notice. I must get into water aerobics, too, as I've heard how good it is for us PG ladies. Are you on the north or south side of Brissy?
Brunette- I'm on the North Side. Doing aqua at Albany Creek pool. Honestly, I couldn't believe how great I felt!! Just nice to be weightless for an hour!
Cool! I think the closest pool to me offering aqua aerobics is the new Colmslie Pool (Morningside). Just tried calling them but they are closed, or at least their swim school message said so, so will try tomorrow. Being weightless if only for an hour sounds like bliss!
Sad to say goodbye
I hope the d&c goes smoothly and that your recovery is quick. 
Let it all out, give yourself time and space to grieve. The baby you so desperately want and utterly deserve is out there in the universe waiting for you. Don't lose hope.
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