Pregnancy after LT TTC #14

Hi all,
Just a really quick post - should be studying for stats exam next week, so first step, before doing practice quiz is to log on here, and reading everyone's stories of course.
Anyway, glad to hear all are going well and looking forward to more scans coming up (Airline). I do love the scans.
Also, as for ABA chat ... well, I remember in high school some ABA mums coming to show us how to breastfeed! We were about 14. I went to a Catholic school. At the same time, I can't remember in what class (Science?), we were shown a video of a real birth, full view, and I swear it was to put us off having sex! Confusing messages. Anyway, this has nothing really whatsoever to do with anything that was said, but I do get a bit sad sometimes about the judgemental behaviours of women against other women, and women against themselves. We are our own harshest critics. And I don't think that I'm being stereotypical (though I know a few blokes who are self-critical, like my youngest brother, who's very harsh on himself). I do it myself a lot. I'm often threatened by others' views, because basically I doubt myself. I hope that getting older (and I reckon older women are such a brilliant example) will help with that.
Well, that is my sermon on the mount! Jesus ...
Um, all this to avoid stats.
Hope all are well and keep the stories coming!
WW

As promised:

DOG, BABY & YOU - Brisbane City Council

DOG BITE STATISTICS:
* 30,000 dog attacks in Australia every year
* 11 toddlers or babies are attacked in QLD every MONTH
* Age group 0-4yrs makes up 27% of the hospitalised dog attacks
* 29% of attacks happen in a home environment (yours or a friends)

BEFORE BABY COMES:
* Get dog used to Environment, Associated Smells, Sounds, One Hand Activities

- Environment: set up any baby equipment that you'll be using in 'common' areas, poracot, bouncer, swing etc.

- Smells: baby oils and any lotions you intend to use (use them on your hands and have dog smell them),
baby powder (sprinkle on dog's skin/coat, bedding). If dog needs to be calmed you can use lavender oil
dabbed around the dog's face (lavender oil does not need to be diluted in a carrier oil)

- Sounds: if you can, obtain a CD of a baby crying (or YouTube). When you play the crying, pick up doll and
mimic what you would do to quiet the baby (feed, change nappy, rock, sing to it etc). Your dog might be
mildly interested at first then ignore it.

- One hand: get your dog used to only having one hand of yours free to pat it, feed it etc.

GETTING TO KNOW THE BABY:
* Toy Change, Walks with Pram, Schedule, Boundaries, Dog Space, Newborn Smells

- Toy Change: Replace any fluffy dog togs with rope toys or chews. The reason for this is that baby will have
plenty of fluffy toys and your dog needs to not believe that fluffy toys belong to just the dog (this might
result in a frustrated dog snapping when baby/toddler picks up it's fluffy toy)

- Walks with Pram: Take dog for walks with the pram (place doll in pram, and use a shawl/bunny rug to cover the front of
the pram so that passers by don't see you with a doll in the pram!). Never tie dog's lead to the pram
in case dog takes off after something and tips the pram over.

- Schedule: Start the schedule of baby crying, changing nappy, feed etc so that dog learns the cues and
knows when it is quiet time. Half hour after putting baby to sleep, play the newborn crying sounds (preferably from the nursery)
then start the routine again. Feed the doll in the normal feeding spot and if tht is the couch then ensure that the dog is
NOT on the couch. If dog is a couch dog, then either change that behaviour now, or don't feed baby there, or if dog
knows to only hop up on couch if invited then don't invite dog when baby is with you on couch.

- Boundaries: Ensure dog has it's own special spot that is just theirs (dog bed, bean bag etc) and when toddler is old enough
teach toddler that only the dog can go to that spot, as dog will want to retreat at some point after having ears pulled
one time too many. Dog must be able to relax in that spot and feel safe.
If you don't want dog to go into nursery, and dog is an inside dog, then it might be easier to just set up a gate at the
nursery door. If you allow dog into nursery then dog should have it's own spot in that room, so that when dog enters it
goes to it's spot and is not underfoot where Mum holding baby could trip over it.

- Newborn Smells: There are 5 things Dad needs to bring home from hospital while Mum and Baby are still in hospital.
1. Pooey nappy
2. Wet nappy
3. Something baby has thrown up on
4. Something baby has been wrapped in
5. Something baby has worn

Ensure dog is calm first.
Show them to dog (just hold them out so dog can sniff), and let dog smell them.
Throw out the nappies, but with everything else, put them in the nursery.
Show the dog the next day, and there should be no interest as dog already smelt them yesterday,
and the smell has now permeated the nursery.

PET CARE
* vet Check - before baby comes ensure all vaccinations are up to date, also check with vet
about paralysis tick as most worming tablets or flea/tick treatments do not cover paralysis tick.
* Ensure dog registration is current and always have collar and blue council tag on dog.
* If dog is long haired and gets groomed, have this done before baby arrives home as there won't be
a lot of time for this after baby arrives.
* Behaviour - ensure that any training is not forgotten by your dog, so go through some training
in the lead up to baby's arrival.
* Arrange for care - Dad will be busy the week that Mum is in hospital, so if you need to arrange
for someone to walk the dog once or twice a day do so. This is a good way to release the dog's
energy and calm them.

BABY COMING HOME
* Get someone (friend, neighbour, family member) to walk/run the dog about 1/2 hour before you are
due to arrive home, so that the energy is released and dog is calmer.
* Dad and baby to stay outside, and Mum to greet the dog first, dog may be very excited to see you
so you will need to calm the dog once you have had your greeting.
* Dad and baby enter. Dog should be relatively calm as they have essentially already smelt the baby
through the clothes etc that were brought home, and they have watched you holding the doll, and
they have heard the crying.

INTRODUCING DOG TO BABY
* Baby should be calm. If crying then don't introduce.
* Dog should be calm.
* Sit on couch (or outdoors if the dog is not inside house), have baby wrapped and just unwrap the legs
and allow dog to sniff/lick calmly. Then wrap baby's legs back up calmly. Dog should be calm and go about
it's normal activities.

Anyone heard from Renee?

MaggiePie, if your BIL is happy to know and discuss the issue, then I'd go with that path. If he's happy to agree to not using the name then if your sister suggests it he could just say he doesn't like it (or changed his mind if he previously okayed it) if he doesn't want to let your sister know you're having a boy. Depends if he's comfortable with a short-term lie to avoid her finding out? Could also give you some warning if they had their hearts set on it too?

Added later:
Actually, I've re-thought this since posting. That short-term lie could turn into a long-term feud if your sister had her heart set on that name too. I think all you can do is explain your position to your BIL and find out their position on the name. If your sister needs to become involved, then she might just have to suck up the not wanting to know and deal with it. Hopefully your BIL will say that's not the one they're leaning towards picking for a boy and that he's happy to remove it from their list of options. Otherwise, you might need a professional negotiator... :goodluck:

Maggie, my cousin has identical twins and I’ve caught up with her a couple of times over the last few months, but you know what, I don’t think of the 101 questions I’ve asked her that I asked her if she purely BF or expressed and BF. I must give her a call. The lady in your mothers group who fed all three babies exclusively by BFing and expressing is definitely a wonder woman! Thanks for relating this story as it gives me more confidence that I can do it. How you related finding a name for your firstborn is exactly what it’s like for me ATM. I feel if I don’t read every name in the name books (over 35,000, mind you) then I might just miss out on something perfect :) It is very draining. I don’t think we’ll be having any more, though, so I want to make sure the names I pick are just right. Hope you all kick your head colds soon. Sounds busy at your house with the reno. I would definitely mention to your BIL the name you’ve picked out. He would tell you surely if you both have picked out the same name. Better to be safe than sorry? If they’ve picked the same name then at least you’ll have time to pick another?

Grub, I wouldn’t complain as I don’t want the hassle. I suppose I wish I could replay the moment and be stronger in my response. I’ll definitely get a lactation consultant if I’m still having problems when home from the hospital. How long did you have to use a consultant? Re gender of your next child, sounds like either way you’ll be happy which is great. That way you can’t lose; it’s a win-win :)

WW, GL in your upcoming exam. Statistics sound scary!

Gosh, Chrissy, thanks so much for your notes. So comprehensive. I’m going to print them out and also show them to DH. My dog is a big licker, and so no doubt when I unwrap the babies he will lick them silly :)

Hope everyone has had a good weekend.

Chrissy, Renee is in another thread I post to. She posted there today. She's okay but has an elevated BP which her dr thinks is due to a slight fever I think.

ah thanks Brunette - just got a bit worried haven't seen her on here in a while.

brunette - i had Ash right on christmas last year so it was a terrible time to have BF issues. I used the consultant for about 2 weeks and she helped bub attach and get established and was so helpful and kind and encouraging. I found some of the midwives talked to me like I was a fool for not helping him latch etc

it's nice have a 2nd one as i already know things I'll do different like not letting anyone trying to 'force' my baby onto the boob straight after birth and doing LOTS more skin to skin to get attachment happening itself. At the end of the day, a baby has got to do it themselves no matter how much you try to make them!

oh the vision of hindsight! don't you hate that. i always have my best comebacks 30 mins after the offence took place lol

omg Airline, i felt tired just reading your post let alone having to live it! hope you get some space soon and lots of rest!!

ck - we did a lot of that stuff with our pooch with DS and it turned out she really couldn't care less about him. but she is a ball obsessed dog and we came home just before christmas so had lots of visitors for several weeks post birth and all of them spoilt here and took her for walks. Now she just goes up and licks bub's face, like "hey there cutie'' and keeps going. And when he occasionally gets her ball i just tlel her to get it off him and she reasonably nicely snatches from his hand.. moments before it was going into the mouth lol. It was such a great relief cos cookie monster was our baby and she does't get along well with other dogs. But they are pack animals and so long as you play by the rules it should be good.

maggie pie - i likey what juniper said re white lie/big lie. def dont' want to cause a rift. my mum STILL goes on that my aunty stole her boy's name arggh 29 and 28 years after my cousin and brother were born!!!!

Hi girls,

Thanks grub, brunette, chrissy and juniper for your name dilemma advice. I will discuss with my BIL. Sure that it won't turn into WW3!

Worrywart, hows the stats study? I hated stats at uni! P values and T values, ahhh! No wonder you were on bellybelly. Sorry not trying to insult you if you do really like it!

Chrissie - great dog info, might have to try with the dog even though she is used to the other kids don't know if she has ever been around a baby, she is a pound puppy.

Grub - great point about the BF thing. When I had DS he had a feed after he was born (which apparently then can last them for 24hours). So I wasn't too worried about him being sleepy the rest of the day and not wanting to feed. Then just before I went to bed the midwife told me I had to wake him every three hours, undress him and wash him with a cold cloth to wake him up and make sure he fed! So then I didn't believe in myself and spent all night trying to feed him and feeling like a failure. One midwife even came up and just started trying to express some milk (yes like a cow) and she was really rough and it hurt. Then she forced the milk into his mouth with a syringe while he was still asleep. In the morning another midwife came in and I was in tears and she asked me what was wrong and I was like 'he won't wake up to feed' and she said 'do you feed every three hours? Just let him sleep he is tired and will wake up when hungry'!!!!!
My point to this story is that all midwives do things really differently and I don't think there is a policy, alot is just personal preference etc. This time I will go on the theme 'mum knows best' and just do what I feel is right. And definately not letting anyone near my nipples again! I think we are in such a vulerable place after giving birth, but if something doesn't feel right don't be afraid to speak up and question the staff. I guess it has taken 2 babies for me to work this out but I hope that I can help some of you to know that the saying 'mum knows best' is the truest saying in the world!!!

AFM - DH home today, had busy day looking after a friends kids. Like having two sets of twins really, so was quite busy. Even did swimming lessons! Cold gone into chest and coughing heaps, poor pelvic floor getting tired... Nephew is coming for a sleepover tomorrow night and staying all day Wed so a few more busy nights coming up...

well girls tried to do lots of persies...but eyes are tired, so starting on this page and gonna try and keep on top of it more.
Maggiepie...wow, 2x twins effectively would have been exhausting!! Poor you with chesty cold...nasty. Hope you feel better soon, but with your nephew coming seems unlikely you'll be recouperating any time soon!!

grub how are you? you did persies but no afm bit. Hope all good. Your pooch sounds cute as! Our girl is less ball mad (unless she gets a treat on returning it) more food mad, so will have to keep an eye on how fast the wee one works out 'if I drop food, Miss D will hoover it up!'.....

thank you to whoever posted the info on dogs and bubs...will read more carefully tomorrow.

Guests have gone, elderly friend back home, DH back to work tomorrow. I am trying to spend rest of week balancing chilling out and doing some chores and seeing some friends.

hope everyone else well xx

Hi Girls

I hope you are all doing nicely and that your belly are cooking along as well.

Question for Brunette: When did you start getting really bad stretching pains??? I having been getting slight pains for the past week or so, but in the past couple of days I've noticed the pain is more pronounced and by about 4.30pm I have to rest or else I'm double over with them. I didn't really get uncomfortable pains with DD until I was about 17 weeks pregnant but this time around it is happening so much sooner. Sorry to bug you but there is no Twin pregnancy forum for me to ask others about it...

Howdy girls! Im behind again :(
Had my scan yesterday, it was awesome. Confirmed its a boy!
Im still sick so that sux but i have finished work! YAY for me.

We must have a couple of ladies getting close to Due dates...??? Havent seen the list in a while so im not sure!

Hi everyone. Huge Congrats for being in here. I haven't got time to read all your posts or get into being a constant visitor here, but I had a quick sticky and one thing I read, I wanted to comment on. I can't remember who it was that spoke about the epidural and needle phobia, but I want to give you a good story from a needle-phobic, epidural phobic (to the point where for my DH in particular, it was known as the "e word", due to him having to assist doctors in a warzone in Africa. Pretty yuck. His fear was what put us both off really trying to get pg for a number of years and I finally had to take the bull by the horns and just do it (hahaha). I knew I was having a c-section, due to Jazzy being breech all the way, so there was that dreaded epidural....can you believe it? Honestly though, you hear a lot of horrible stories, and mine was fantastic. I let the team know to expect me to go into shock, so they prepared the hottest yummy blankets and talked me through every step of the way. I meditated and sang my "sunshine song" in my head the whole way through to calm myself and stay still and they said I was so calm, they thought I'd passed out....blissed out is more like it. I was about to meet my baby, I was over-coming my fear, I was on my own (as DH wasn't allowed in) and I absolutely kicked arse and poor DH has never been prouder:) If you are not too over-weight, I think it's easier to place the needle, but even so if you know to expect that they might have to try a few times to get it in the right position, you are stronger and less likely to get upset. If you get sick from the drugs, (which I knew might happen), you tell them straight away and they shoot some other drug into you that quickly subsides the nausea. I never would have thought I'd be flying the flag for the much-feared epidural and caesarian, but I wouldn't have it any other way and I would do it all again if I had to.

P.S there is so much ego that goes into those decisions of whether to cloth or not to cloth, BF or not to BF and all those things we think we know about ourselves, but you will not know yourself until they put that baby in your arms. Then you will do every single thing you thought you would never do and if no one gets hurt, it really doesn't matter. Ilove to save the planet as much as the next person, but there are days when you are up to elbows in explosive number 3s and you will empty the entire wipes cleaning up one nappy and they are the days when you are all for the sposies cos you just refuse to rinse another nappy. Good luck lovely mums to be.xoxo

Hi Murphy, I really enjoyed reading your post. Thank you. Sounds like a lot of experience and common sense talking. I especially love the bit about having a particularly nasty no. 2 to deal with and going through all of the wipes!

CONGRATULATIONS, Jaki, on expecting a baby boy! Yay! And double yay for finishing work today!

Kelly, I'm at work today but will check my journal when I get home to see if I've written when those ligament/stretching pains started. I know that I had them pretty early on and they were, and still are, quite regular. I usually get them on my lower right side, above the pubic bone and next to my hip bone. Is this where you're getting yours?

Jaki!!!! congratulations on the news it's a wee BOY!!!! whoo hoo for you! That'll narrow the name search down ;-) I'm sorry you're still sick....I thought I was the only one with nausea that was seemingly endless but mine has virtually gone, big hugs for that one! My scan is on the 9th Nov, and I'll be 19wks 6 days so fingers crossed that bub allows a good look down below!

kellyd - not having twins as you know but i just so happened to read that part in my book (yes i have to re-read the stupid pregnancy book enough though i was preg this time last year!) and it said those pains for twins can start very early ie 6 weeks. I'm getting various shooting pains already (same as with DS) at various times and only have 1 on board and a few weeks behind you!

murph - thanks love. I really wanted to write something smarty pantz back to you... but these girlies don't know us as a couple ROFL (murph and i have been together since LTCC thread). Seriously tho, I went through a complete natural birth with only gas and and tens machine and all the ouchies that come with it JUST because the epdidural scared the pants off me! AFter DS was born, I said to DH "next time i'm having hte bleeding epidural' lol. However, now i'm thinking i'll just try winging it au natural again.... hhhhmmmmm its' amazaing how your memory of the pain etc just sort of disappears afterwards.

JAKI80 --- HUGE CONGRATULATIONS LOVE!!! Little boys are just so lovely. I'm obsessed with my boy's gorgeous little (and i mean little) bum cheeks (i know weirdo), they are so cute. mine is currently kneeling at his toy boys removing every single bleeding toy, while going "aaahiinng'' in a high pitch lol too cute!!! and if you go and put the toys back he gets reeeaaalll cranky lol. Thanks great about finishing work! lucky lady.

lol Airline - our cookie monster goes straight to the high chair and the floor around it whenever she comes inside, and she's scored a rusk or two from places that I didn't even know they were. In fact *may sound gross* i do used cookie monster as my mop after dinner lol. She cleans up all the mess and I get a clean floor... then it's just a matter of a quick steam mop every few days and we're good! nothing like lazy mummy :)

maggiepie - that sounds like you had a pretty awful time of it. there was only 1 midwife who i instantly took a dislike to and she said everythign contradictory to the others. IT was confusing cos we were told something different by every person! in the end we decided we'd listen to the one nurse who we really liked and followed her advice. BUt I remember we had skin to skin post birth and then went up to our room and cos DS was sleeping 'didn't want to wake him'. So we didn't cuddle him for ages, he didn't wake up for a feed either. After quite a few hours i ended up asking a nurse what i should do - one said leave him sleep another said feed him asap!

But this time i realise sleep is all newborns do! so this bub is getting cuddled to death and lots of skin on skin and will have free reign of boobies.

hi brunette- how are you feeling today love?
hi CK too! :)

ww - how did your stats exam go?
hi juniper and big hello to all the other loverlies here :) stay healthy :)

well it's all happening here for us. We are moving from Newcasstle to DArwin in about 23 days! So my life is crazy busy with that and caring for Ash that I can't believe it's only a few days til our big viability scan!

I have been feeling awfully nauseaus (yeah yeah kelly d, go on say it! "told you so'') and was hugging the porcelain princess at the mere sight of DS's mashed veg and steak the other night uuuugggghhhh. Poor bub just looked at me like I was crazy and daddy had to get out of his sick bed to do dinner lol.

Well better go, we are off to playgroup this morning (it's my 'wear out the child to make him sleep' plan)

Grub, I also remember you from LTTC thread days. So nice that you have no.2 cooking, congratulations! Yes Miss D had her own routine, once let in the back door,
1. straight to cat dishes to lick, 2. have a drink - that stuff is sal-ty! 3. back for a 2nd lick, who knows what you might've left 4. oh mum/dad hi! didn't see you there, yes cuddles and tummy rub please!
I am sure she will incorporate her new best friend into the equation....and we'll still be bottom of the pile, unless we have food in our hand/mouth/within 2 meter radius.

Ah nausea nausea, 9 weeks was my time....and I'm sooo worried it'll come back again in 3rd trimester. Did you have it last year too?

Thanx ladies, we were always excited to have a boy but now that it is confirmed its SUPER exciting :)

Airline i dont have a baby sickness, altho i am puking every day. I have suspected Mycoplasma. Just waiting on BT results to comfirm. Ive never been this sick for so long, and with no end in sight! Apparently it will run its course untreated in 6-8 weeks :(

Grub that is a HUGE move!!!!!!!! Good luck!

Grub: Sorry but I'm having a little chuckle to myself about your m/s, I did teel you not to wish it upon yourself but you don't listen...lol.... just wait until you have that horrid poopy nappy to change and your gag reflexes kick in big time...

Jaki: So happy you got to see someones little appendage.. I know you always knew you were having a boy but to actually see it for your own eyes makes it so much more real.

As for my stretching pains, I'm getting them from my belly button down and radiating to both my left and right hips. I thik I might be feeling it more to the sides as when I was carrying Tara I was all out front but obviously these guys need more space so I getting stretched to the sides, front and anywhere else that they can find room.

O.k, now my little bit re: epidurals, b/fing etc... As I had a c/s with Tara I knew to expect the epidural and to be honest the worst part was the local aneasthetic being put in first, it is like a bee sting and then after that you don't feel anything. As I'm not overly tall (164cm) the epidural hit almost immediately and before I was even laying back on the table my legs were completely numb. I generally get low blood pressure and as soon as I started feeling a bit woozy I just told the aneathatist and he gave me some extra medication to help with that. I do remember feeling very tired after delivery and in recovery and all I wanted to do was sleep but that is an obvious side effect from having the epidural. Now as for b/fing, I am already getting pressure to bottle feed both babies but I am really keen to give b/fing a go this time around again. I've learnt from the first time to trust my instincts and do what I feel is best. With Tara after delivery she knew exactly what to do, but then every 3 hours I had a midwife coming in and trying to force her onto the breast to feed. Because she wasn't happy with being made to feed she refused to breast feed, at times there were 4 people trying to force her onto the breast and she just refused all the time. Because they were concerned about her not feeding they then put her onto the bottle and as there was no work involved in feeding from the bottle (it basically just flowed down her throat) I then had no chance of getting her to attach. I expressed for 3 weeks but as Tara never feed my supply never really came in and pretty much dried up after 3 weeks. I would really like to try again this time around with some hindsight and my thinking is that if I'm going to be spending the first 6-8 weeks just feeding I might as well do it the easy way.

Anyway, better get motivated. We have had our pancakes for breakfast (Tara's favorite at the moment) so better get her dressed and maybe I should get showered and dressed as well.

Jaki - what's mycoplasma...sounds nasty!?

Kelly your BF experience sound horrid. I wonder sometimes if it would be best for the M/W's to just take a step back and see how you go on your own. After all women didnt have lactation advisers in the past. I think like you said instinct should play a huge part.

Airline it is some kind of bacterial infection. It makes you cough and have all that yukky flu stuff for 6-8 weeks! I saw a Dr last week who said i had the flu and waisted my time on some pills but i knew this aint no flu! Thank goodness this new Dr actually listened to me!

Jaki, mycoplasma sounds horrid. How much longer do you have to go until it passes?

Kelly, your experience with midwives forcing your 1st bub to BF sounds awful. At least you now have some experience under your belt and know what you want to do for the twins. I had a look at my PG book, and the first time I had ligament pains was week 7. I don't get them from my tummy, just lower left and lower right, usually lower right. From what Grub said it sounds like it's normal for women carrying twins to get these pains quite early.

Grub, poo to morning sickness. I was lucky to not suffer from it at all, doubly lucky considering my high hormone levels with twins I suppose. FX it leaves you at the 13-week mark if not before. Wow, you've got a big move ahead of you. The thought of all that packing is making me tired! Big change in the temperature, too. Are you looking forward to moving to Darwin?

AFM, all these horror stories of midwives forcing babies onto the boob are making me very scared. I have heard this during our antenatal classes. But I know my DH will be in my corner and has no problems in being quite forceful if needed and telling them to step back. It's when he goes home that I'm more worried about. I've got my baby shower on this Saturday which should be good. At least 20 people or more are coming over. Not really looking forward to the games as I'm not really into that sort of thing but I'm just going to smile and pretend I am so I don't offend my SIL who is organising the shower for me. An update on our last OB visit: I have minor placenta praevia, 2.5 cm away from the cervix. If it doesn't move up any further, my OB will let me go until 38 weeks if I make it that long and then schedule me for a local/spinal c/s. I don't have to have a general! So that's great news. The only downside was he mentioned the possibility of a post partum haemhorrage and if the bleeding could not be stemmed a hysterectomy would have to be done! Far out! So now I'm back to worrying about bleeding out on the table or having to have a hysterectomy!

far out brunette! that's pretty scary. but i'm sure your doc is just giving you the lay of the land ie the risks. fingers crossed. Wow it's all coming up quickly for you now eh! and have fun at your baby shower. I'm not a huge party games person but i must admit the games my friend put on for me were very funny. We all laughed our bottoms off at it. Just let the inner silly girl out! lol.

yep looking forward to the move. we are in the defence forces so it's pretty normal for us. we've been here awhile tho so it's scary to start over all over again iykwim. but i contacted a defence community centre and there's already a playgroup, craft group and coffee n chat group i'll be joining once we are there. I've really learnt its all about throwing yourself out there and not being shy... and accepting all types of people because otherwise you would never make friends.

Jaki - hope you feel better soon love. is it they wont or cant treat you ? ie letting it run its course

Kelly - i'm not talking to you miss smarty pants :o fancy laughing at someone who feels unwell! humph *sulking*

haha airline - had to laugh about your fur baby. that's what ours is like sometimes. i had both her and bub-bub watching me eat my sandwich today... well bub was watching cookie watch me eat my sandwich... he pulled her tail quite hard and the good girl just sort of licked and pushed him off :) It's funny cos he stands really close to her and squeals with delight at her.

yep i did get sick last year and very very very tired ...from memory it was week 6 (tick) to week 14. I had a few good weeks and then got swine flu (super scary when 20 weeks) and then by the time i got better I hit a whole new brick wall of lethargy and tired - you girls who are nearing or in your 3rd trimester will KNOW what i mean. It's quite amazing, one day you can stay awake past 2pm and then the next you just can't, no matter how you try!

I'm a little worried how i'm going to handle 2 under 2 but figure bridge, cross et al

re bf and mws- seriously you'll find one or two mws who you'll love and just go with their advice. I found i needed them to tell me what to do when cos for me it didn't come as naturally as i'd hoped. What? bath him! he's so small! he didn't do anything! aarrgghhh! And at the end of the day, it's your baby, your body so you set the rules... hahahaa let's just see what happens in 9 month's time to Mrs "i'm so confident in what i'm doing''!!!!!

:o

Brunette, holy crapoly that sounds scary! Im sure you'll be fine tho :) At least you get to be awake! Yay.
Baby shower sounds so exciting! Im really looking forward to mine... all 4 of them!

Grub your attitude to all this moving is great. I really admire that.

They wont treat me due to being preggo, he did give me liquid codine for the coughing tho so im off my head alot, lol.
I have been coughing for almost a month so hopefully it will pass soon. However my more severe symptoms have only been going for 2 weeks so god only knows.
My Dr was funny he said 'well your either going to get better or die'. Makes sense if you think about it. lol

Hi ladies,

Apologies for butting in but wanted to add something to the breastfeeding discussion:

The ABA website has a section on 'baby led attachment' with photos and a good description of how it works. I had heaps of trouble in the early weeks with feeding and finally saw a lactation consultant who was just fantastic! But the first thing she said to me over the phone was to check out the baby led attachment info as it was really useful. It's basically about putting the baby in your chest and letting them work it out - and can I say it worked a treat for Finn. One hour with the consultant and no more nipple shields or pain!! So do check it out if you have any concerns. It might not be for everyone but I think the more info you have the better!!

Anyway, hope you're all well and look forward to some announcements soon xx

Hi Everyone, so much going on, it's hard to keep up.

Brunette, whew, sounds scary about those possibilities with the c-s, but ... I don't know, they're required to tell you the worst case scenario legally ... so ... I mean, when I had my lap, the doctor spent a good 10 minutes going over how my bowels my split open ... then, with our early scans, we were told it was a potential partial mole which can need chemotherapy and a year of not TTC ... and none of these things eventuated. Fingers crossed. GL with that baby shower.

Jaki, mycoplasma. Wow, that sounds like something off House. Sorry, not funny in real life, I guess. Get better soon. OH, and congrats on having a boy! I have three little brothers and I've always loved little boys - so sweet.

Grub, hope that nausea fades soon. I guess it is a mixed blessing/curse .. I found it so reassuring ... for a while .. then it was a drag.

Kelly, thanks for telling us about the epis/c-s. It's really important to know these things, I think, and I've been kind of ... avoiding that info out of worry.

Okay, AFM, I really have to go study (still!). My stats exam is Monday. I am dreaming of a guy called Pearson (as in correlations) right now. It is a far cry from Eric from True Blood. Also, I am having some sadness, I have to say. I think it's going away but I've been a bit down, and not sure why. I feel a bit overwhelmed, I think, with the reality of things. I feel a bit ... excluded at work. Like they know I'm leaving, so I'm not getting much work. Anyway, I may go see my psychologist again. I don't know. Anyone else have mood spells?

Oh dear, I"m back. Bouncers, remove that woman, she's not even pregnant!

Just wanted to say re the midwives, as with the epidural / natural birth etc, that knowledge is power. too much is a bad thing but some knowledge is good, as with knowing that there seems to be something about midwives in hospitals these days that are like a militant force and it's not uncommon to have all the pressure described by the girls here (unfortunately). Midwives come in all shapes and sizes and change their shifts so you feel like you go through about 20 of them if you are in hopsital long enough. Some of my experiences were absolutely horrendous, like Kelly describes, but I had one really fantastic old-school midwife who was my complete angel and went in to battle for me. I had all of the things described, the cow-milking, the pulling your boobs out for every nurse who started a shift and wants to see how you latch and of course a tiny baby is very sleepy (Jazz was 2.4 kilos) and you've got people wanting her fed hourly with a syringe!! I was constantly threatened that they would take my baby to the special care unit if she wouldn't feed and if her temp dropped, despite being in a freezing cold room with monitors and alarms on her and despite having a wonderful bond and skin contact from the second she was placed on me. I even got a reputation for feeding well and that gave everyone even more incentive to come watch the freaky woman that knows how to feed her baby! Dumb, dumb, dumb, you are so vulnerable, it was just so yuck until I started taking control myself. In big hospitals they seem to feel like they have ownership of your baby and your body is just a tool for them, but like many of us found, you know so much more and your instinct should really be the thing you look to above all else. Nature does equip us with a certain amount of survival instinct so we can look to others we trust for help but ultimately you should trust that you will probably know what's best. I just wanted to tellyou that so thatif you are in that situation, then you might remember what us other girls have said and you don't have to put up with too much interference. You might have a completely wonderful experience and a lot of that can be up to you taking control and making the decisions that best fit your situation and the way you feel. Lots of love and luck for the rest of your pg journey.

As for me, I'm procrastinating a bit because my little Possum Jazzy was born completely deaf and after a long, fraught journey, she is about to go interstate to have surgery for two Cochlear implants. I'll say bye-bye now cos I can't spare any more time to get addicted to this thread (although I so easily could). Good luck. xoxo

murph goodness me, I remember reading your first few posts after Jasmine was born!!!! Look how big she is now. Good luck with the surgery and let us know how she goes. xx

Grub, that’s great that you’ve already found out there’s three different groups for defence force wives that you can join when you move. You’re right, best just to throw yourself in at the deep end and try to meet people you like. I know exactly what you mean about the lethargy that hits you in the 3rd trimester. I’m at work today and fighting a wave of tiredness. All I want to do is find a dark place to crawl in and sleep :) Just think, if I can do it with two under one month (ha, ha, ha) you can do two under two. And at least you know what you’re doing. I have no clue. Talk about jumping in the deep end. I’ll try my hardest to let the silly side of myself out tomorrow – but if I do it won’t be for long :ROFL:

Jaki, four baby showers – wow, you will be spoilt. Lucky you.

Hi, Lise, good to hear from you again. I’ve seen baby-led attachment at our ABA course and it looked interesting. Glad to hear it worked for you and Finn.

Thanks, WW. If it makes you feel any better, for most of my PG I’ve been in one of two moods: teary or angry! True. I was only thinking a few days ago how I haven’t had a cry for ages (must have been in angry mode for a long time) and then I started thinking how these babies are going to be here soon and got a bit scared at the thought and started crying. I think whatever you’re feeling is just natural and a result of a buildup of hormones. I have only 3 days of work left, finishing up next Friday, and I started packing up my desk a few days ago. When I left for the day I looked around and thought, god, I’m going to be home soon for almost a year and got really teary. It wasn’t so much that I was going to miss work (although on some level I am sure I will) it was more that I’m getting closer to a life-changing event and change for me is very scary. Definitely see your psychologist and talk it through as it certainly can’t help to discuss how you’re feeling with a professional. Hope your mood improves really soon. GL with your exam on Monday.

Murphy, thanks again for your insightful comments. Wishing you all the best for little Jazz’s cochlear implant operation. Please pop in and let us know how it all goes and the expression on her face when they turn it on for the first time and she hears her very first sounds!

Hello to all the other ladies on the thread. Have a good weekend.

worry wort - just wanna send you some relaxed vibes and give you a big hug! You know you can get PND during pregnancy so I would really encourage you to go and talk to someone about how you are feeling. Your hormones are going to be going crazy over the next few months and if you can stay on top of your feelings you should be better able to manage it all. I think we all should expect the gamut of emotions but I don't think any one emotion should hang around for a long time - and if it's concerning you then you know ti's time to talk to someone. That sucks at work, i had that too but it was just practicality on their part as the work needed to be done, the other people needed hte skills for when I left and I was there to help them. Still it's a bit hurtful to not feel valued.

well Jaki ti doesn't seem they are overly concerned about teh "die'' part so all good! but i do hope you feel better soon!

lise - yep that was what my gibberish meant.. baby led attachment. It's amazing girls. my bub wouldn't attach and the lactation consultant advised me to pump and bottle feed and do lots adn lots of skin on skin and he'd come round. I thought what a load of bollocks... just having a baby lay on you ain't going to help him feed. well you can guess the result.... he figured it out and got on. When the bub comes out they have got to learn to lick (that's the rooting around part on your chest), if they don't learn to put htier tongue out, they will never be able to bf as tongue out is the way to do it. That is why skin to skin is so important because the baby is instinctually going to lick and then suck. does that make sense? someone with more knowledge might be beter able to explain but that is what i was told.

hugs to you murph!!! can't wait til monday :) oxox

brunette - have fun at your party!!!!

hi to all the other girls here.

afu- gotta start packing up this weekend as our few remaining weekends here at booked with partys and visitors and events! can't believe it's nearly monday and my scan... gone very quickly. I'm super nervous still, you know the 'what if' scenario. Taking bub garage saling this morning. you pick up some great toys for cheap cheap cheap... we got him a great activity centre (a big play thing they sit in) which he loved to be in for $30 - it was used but in great condition, all i did was wash it up, clean it up and it looks new... looked up online and that particular one retails for $230!!!! so i love a good garage sale lol.

have a good weekend ladies and babies.

ox

Hi loverly ladies, just stalking this thread and have read the most wonderful news, the biggest congrats to KellyD on your two bundles, and to you gorgeous Grub on your BFP. Wishing everyone the best, I can't say enough to enjoy every minute, it goes so increadibly fast. Good luck!

thanks so much BDT! i love seeing all those familiar names stalking here! :)

well ladies just want to report that my scan went beautifully yesterday :) and there's a nice strong heart beat and all the bits. so doc was very happy. slightly changed my due date to July 1, which annoyed me but turned out to be in my favour as obstetricians in darwin are as rare as hen's teeth and being a june due date meant i 'd missed out as they were all fully booked!!!

so i'm harassing the last two (there's only 3 obsts up there) this monr in the hope i can get in somewhere. aaarrgghh

HI Ladies,
Been keeping quiet as nothing particularly exciting or news worthy has happened. Bubs is now kicking a lot more than my DD did, which is nice because with her I used a doppler for most of the pregnancy because she was so quiet. Can't walk very well anymore, but I knew that was coming I guess. Going on a trip to Sydney next week without DD or DH which will be nice as I am so used to having to look after other people. Just wanted a break before junior arrives as I am a full-time Mum which at times has been hard as I really wanted to go back to work and use my brain but my DH didn't want me to.

Great news Grub on your scan - hope you find an OB soon, I am sure you will.

Worrywort - hope that exam went well -my days of study are behind me now, although sometimes I wished I could do more to use my brain! I hope you are feeling better too, I like to think feelings of sadness are our minds way of taking us through this that are making us scared and instead of ignoring them, making us think about them so we can deal with them. I am blessed with a sunny disposition, but I have friends and family who have suffered at times so am completely in agreement with seeking help if you think you need it :)

Brunette - hope you are doing well and enjoying these last few weeks before your bubsicles arrive. I hope your anxiety about the birth is reducing as well -keep remembering you have an entire team of people who are trained to make sure you and your bubs are healthy and happy :)

HI to everyone I have missed :)

Hey everyone,

Grub, wonderful news about your scan! Did you get some pics? And thanks so much for your advice/support about the depression thing. It seems to have lifted a bit, but I know it's kind of a susceptibility I have to watch out for. I really like what you say about moving. It is a great attitude, just to put yourself out there and join in. I guess you're kind of accustomed to it.

Brunette, it does help, hearing about your experience. Yep, that pretty much nails it - angry or teary! It is such a life-changing event, isn't it? I also think that the build-up is so long when you've been LTTTC. Hope your last week at work goes well!

Murph, just wishing you all the best for the op for your daughter. Let us know how it goes.

Lairdoz, thanks also for your well-wishes. Study is over-rated. Well, no actually I do enjoy the challenge and keeping my mind busy. Though sometimes I think I need to cut down on that. Thinking. You're having trouble walking? That sounds tough. Enjoy Sydney. Good idea, to get away.

It's sunny sunny here today ... very rare. But I'm stuck at work - alone! I love it. Feel really useful! Also, I did my stats exam yesterday so I'm Uni-free ... for a good long while, I guess.

Hey to everyone on the thread,
WW

Grub, excellent news on your scan. Also on your EDD if it means you get more choice for your OB.

Thanks, Lairdoz. Still a bit anxious but trying to be more positive and think that nothing bad will happen as I'm in the hands of a very experienced OB. Plus, as you say, an experienced team of people. I have my next US this Thursday so FX my placenta has moved up even further! Glad you're getting and enjoying lots of kicks from bub. I used to whinge about painful kicks to the ribs, but then just recently I had a really quiet day of no kicking and worried they were all right. Luckily the day after they were quiet I had an OB visit and both were all okay, so I know what you mean about being reassured by their constant kicking. Yay to your me-time trip to Sydney next week. Enjoy!

WW, glad to hear relating my experience helped. It is definitely a life-changing event, and for those of us who are LTTTCers we certainly ride a rollercoaster, too. Two more days of work for me; and no more uni for you for a while, so double yay!

Hi BD, just posted a comment to you on FB. How you going?

AFM, I had a great weekend. I really enjoyed the baby shower (which one of my SILs organised) inc most of the games. I got totally spoilt with presents. Two of DH's cousins bought the most gorgeous cake with marzipan icing sculpted in the shape of two babies bums - one pink and one blue. It was so cute and very tasty too. I totally stuffed myself full of goodies and it was great to catch up with everyone. Then on Sunday I had a maternity shoot done by my other SIL. I had to get into some interesting poses inc one where I laid on my back across a pillow facing backwards to the camera. Quite tricky to hold the pose so glad I didn't have to for long. I also got airbrushed makeup and very smouldery eyes, amazing, so hope the pics come out okay. Yesterday I did about three loads of washing of sheets, towels, clothes etc and today I ironed everything and put it all away so am feeling pretty organised. Just need to write a list now of remaining things we need.

Hello to any ladies I've missed!

Ladies, ladies.....its been quiet in here....then when I'm up to my eyes working, sorting out aged care residency for our mate in hospital etc it explodes and I don't have time to dwell..... maybe Thursday, my day off.
however popped in to say, had anatomy scan...all great...and
IT'S A BOY!! ;-)

Jaki - congrats on the confirmation that the docs got it right all those months ago! Yay a Boy!

And a boy for you too Airline!!! (I hope all these boy confirmations means I might have a girl) ;-)

Sorry for no personals, in a bit of a rush. Hope everyone is well.

Congrats Jaki and Airline on your boy news!!! That's so exciting!!

DH and I are hoping for a boy as well so hopefully this blue news rubs off!!

Congratulations AIRLINE little boys are just so adorable. truly they are just so yummy lol

ww - glad you are feeling a bit better love. and great news that stat exam is finished lol when do you have to go back?

lairdoz - that break sounds devine. how long for? just a couple of nights? enjoy it sweetie.

brunette - hahaha loved that you liked the games. told you it's not that bad. I think because everyone is there for you and just so genuinely happy and excited for you, it makes it all so much more fun (hey who doesn't like it to be all about them!). those cakes sound v cute and those photos sound like they'll be great.

glennyc and CK - at least you'll have someone to swap with if CK gets a boy and glenny gets the girl :ROFL:

got into an ob up there. ended up going with the only one i could go with but he does all his own scans and is able to fit me in the day after we arrive for my NT scan (which is due between that week and chrissy!). So that's really good, plus he's originally from here and his wife, who is his midwife too, was really lovely to chat to.

I'm not overly worried as I do all the work anyway and am really just paying for the private hospital room.

I did just want to add one thing to the discussion - I found with DS it really took me til about 20 weeks or so when i found out the sex and saw it was going so well to accept this was happening! After LTTC i think you come to expect failure and "it'll never happen'' sort of attitude. And I've discovered it's the same 2nd time around! I remember with DS i found a website that gavve me the % chance of survival per pregnancy week and actually felt a huge wave of relief once we hit the high 20s as the chances are pretty good. My thinking was "no matter what i'll get my baby''. Crazy i know.

oh and murph did a quick FB post that Jazzy's op went well and she's recovering with lots of hugs and cuddles. thought i'd let you know cos who knows when murph will get back on here. Her little one is truly just the most gorgeous little thing.

Congrats Airline on your little boy. Dh is hoping and praying that we have at least one blue one this time around, but he keep telling me he thinks they are both girls. Hopefully we might find out at our 16 week growth scan..

Grub: Yay for getting into an Ob, my Ob this time around couldn't fit me in with Tara and I had to go with someone else although when I was due to deliver the Ob I was with was on holidays and my original Ob did the delivery anyway. Only good thing is that the Ob I ended up using for my antenatal care charged less, so I got the Ob I wanted for delivery at a cheaper price :)

AFM: Not much happening, still tired and getting stretching pains although this is supposed to be a big growth week. Also we have decided instead of buying 2 new car seats for the babies to hire capsules for approx 8 months as this is going to be easier to get babies in and out of the car as I can then carry both at once instead of doing 1 at a time plus having to juggle Tara as well. We will then buy for all the kids booster seats that go from 8kg-26kg's so they will last until they are 7. We alread have 2 car seats (1 in each car) for Tara, but I'm going to give one to my mum & dad to put in there car so they can take Tara for me if I need a break. I've got a quote for the capsules (babylove snap n go) and I can get them for $110 each for 8 months which I think is pretty reasonable. So got to now arrange to view them and then book them for next May.

Anyway better go, Tara was up at 7.45am this morning (too early for her) and has had her bottle and is back in bed so that means I need to get motivated while she is still asleep.

Hello to everyone else.