I don't have any advice but I do know you should have been told at the ultrasound about the swelling. With our first bub at our 19 week scan it was discovered he had a cleft lip and this was told to us by a doctor who checked the findings then we were told what was going to happen from there on in. I would be focusing on good thoughts and vibes to your little man for now and then making a formal complaint to the hospital!
Thinking of you and keep us posted xx