This is my second pregnancy and I am very confused as to whether to have a c-section or vaginal birth this time around. With my first I was induced had a 13 hour labour and ended up with forceps an episiotomy and 3rd degree tear and then had to have a blood transfusion after all that. I have also got a prolapse from giving birth to my daughter. I am quite small so the doctor said this may be why I had so many complications but my baby was only 7 pound 1 ounce . I would love to try again but don't want to go through with what happened the first time. If only I knew now what was going to happen. Another concern I have is my prolapse getting worse. Is there anyone else out there who has a prolapse and is in there second pregnancy? Are you concerned aswell? I am sooooo confused.
I just wanted to wish you well for this pregnancy and birth. When you've had a traumatic experience first time around it can make you birthing choices second time around very difficult - I know this is something that I have also grappled with in the last few months. but only you can make this decision. My advice would be to reserach the different options available to you, talk to your care providers and possibly even seek out an independent midwife to help counsel you. GL
Thanks so much Miss C! Yes making a decision is certainly very hard. Would love to go natural again if I new it was going to be o.k. Most doctors are saying to go ceaser if bubs appears to be any bigger than 7 pounds (like my daughter was) so may have to wait and see if they can tell how big bubs is maybe. One midwife said position that you give birth in are very important too and a few other things can help with easier delivery. How is your pregnancy going?
Hun, I wouldn't let speculation about your babies size influence your decision. Those scans are notoriously inaccurate, and really the size of your baby shouldn't influence your ability to birth it anyway. Start doing some research and reading. Maybe start with New Active Birth, that will give you some great insights on how you can harness your bodies natural ability to have a successful natural birth. Also there are some great articles in the articles section of this site which you would probably find insightful.
i was also induced with my first becky & had a similar labour/birth to you (without the transfusion or prolapse). this time i have sought the advice of an independent midwife that i hold in the highest regard & have talked through labour/birth second time round. i would encourage you to do the same as i have found it very helpful & reassuring - right down to if i am induced again. and maybe watch some videos such as ricky lake's 'the business of being born' - it's very informative & explains why an induction may result in intervention & complications that may not have occurred if a woman was allowed to go into labour naturally.
i would also talk to a doctor/midwife about the prolapse & any impact that may have on a subsequent birth.
i am a great believer that in most cases you will not grow a baby you cannot birth. there was a wonderful link on this forum to a site showing small/petite ladies giving birth to big babies. it is empowering to know that your body can birth a big baby (even though your first wasn't too big at all ) despite what some obs may tell you. there are some great birth stories in this forum too that may help you reconcile yourself to whatever you decide is the right decision for you.
I have had all my babys close together (about 22months between each) and I have never had any interventions or drugs other then breaking my waters to help bubs get out with the first two births.
With my first, I had bad 3rd degree tearing, bubs went into distress and needed to be resusitated and PPH, I also had a slight prolapse and abdominal seperation. The birth was actually pretty bad, and DH was scared I would die - I was too out of it to care.
I went onto have my second without any incidences - not even a little grazing when he was born.
With my third - he was a 10pound baby. I had severe SPD and M/S and just all round an absolutely horrendous pregnancy. He was 10 days overdue. My prolapse got significantly worse - but his birth was so easy and straight forward, my body done it without my even pushing at all - only very slight grazing, no tears at all. It was an easy birth. Probably the easiest of all, despite him being my biggest. The prolapse improved after months of pelvic floor exercises after the birth. I also had bad seperation of the abdominals, but that too got better with exercise after. My body had been at it's physical limit carrying such a big bub.
With my fourth, The pregnancy was realitively easy, my prolapse was much better then last time round, and I kept doing my pelvic floor exercises. Birth was uncomplicated, and straightforward. No tears, no graziing. And amazingly my prolapse has all but dissapearred (still there but extremely mild, don't notice it at all) - apparently those pelvic floor muscles have been doing something; even my doctor was surprised as she said she has never seen that amount of recovery before, without surgery. Only had minor abdominal seperation that went back to normal within 2 months. (I would do this birth again in a heartbeat - and I am very much NOT a person who enjoys birthing or labour).
The point I want you to take away from this is that, every single birth is different. It really is. It doesn't matter what happened last time, each time it is a clean slate. Also your body gets better at it. It has been through it before, so it now knows what to do and it does it much more effiecently.
The biggest thing for me has been overcoming my fear. It is a fear I developed because of my first birth, and one I had to work to overcome. because if you are scared, it can lead you to panic, and that can be more determental for your birthing plans they anything else. It is hard to have faith in your body and you own ability to give birth without complications, especially when the first time didn't go as planned or in any manner that is pleasent to remember. I know. But it doesn't mean that just because the first time turned out that way, that every time will.
Confused!
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) despite what some obs may tell you. there are some great birth stories in this forum too that may help you reconcile yourself to whatever you decide is the right decision for you.
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