*hugs* hun! FWIW we had major dramas at my first scan with DD1 - my mum wanted to come in and just assumed that only 1 person would be allowed, so she actually had the gall to take a few digs at DH in the clinic waiting room, suggesting that he should just stay out of it because *she* was the grandparent... in her defense, DH and I had only been a couple for 4 weeks when I fell pg so nobody was really convinced he was going to stick around, I think mum was just trying to establish her authority over him in the relationship stakes (she's always been a little narcissistic like that, everyone must defer to her and give her whatever she wants or there's hell to pay). Anyway, long story short, I just asked the u/s tech if we could grab an extra chair and it was all good, both mum and DH got to see our little parasite wriggling away and waving arm and leg buds around.
But yeah, if you don't feel comfortable having her at the 20wk scan, let her know she's welcome to come to a later one - tell her it'll be better that way because she'll be able to see more detail as bub grows bigger Your pregnancy, your rules... but try your best not to leave your mum out, she is probably trying to make a really good effort this time because she probably feels guilty about not having spent more time with you while you were pregnant with Hayley. xx
I'd let her go to at least one of your scans....if you don't feel comfortable with her being at the "big" 20 week scan, invite her to another. Who knows, baby maybe not spread his/her legs at the 20 week scan and she may not miss out after all if she goes to a later scan?!
My mum came with me to my morphology scan with my DH. My sister came to an emergency u/s I has at 14 weeks due to bleeding. I'm very open to anyone and everyone sharing the experience lol
Are you going to have a 3d/4d scan done at some stage?? Because if you are going to you could say come to that one intead because its more than just an ultrasound (if that makes sense).
I second the 3d/4d one if you're going to have one done - it's a lot less of a medical/diagnostic situation and more just for fun/bonding. Or a later scan if you're uncomfortable with her being at the morphology scan.
We decided against having DD come along to the morphology scan just in case something was picked up and instead booked a 3d scan at 25 weeks - the pressure was off, there were no surprises and she thoroughly enjoyed it. Bit of a different situation with a grandparent I guess but may be a suitable compromise.
my mum came to all 3 of my 18 week scans with all 3 pregnancies. I liked sharing it with her and DH.
Its a personal choice and if u decide not to let her just tell her ur only allowed ur partner in with u and u can show her the dvd
DH couldn't make Liebling's 19 week scan, so I invited MiL. Bless her, she thought she wouldn't be allowed into the scan room but came anyway. She'd never seen (or had) an ultrasound before. (BTW, I still haven't told my own mother about this.) I mostly invited her because sitting around waiting a couple of hours for a 5 minute scan is my idea of boredom and I wanted someone to chat with.
DH got the 8w, 12w, 21w and ~30w scans though, so all was good there.
Your pregnancy, your rules... but try your best not to leave your mum out, she is probably trying to make a really good effort this time because she probably feels guilty about not having spent more time with you while you were pregnant with Hayley. xx
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