when you go to the bathroom and close the door, the door brushes up against your bump.
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when you go to the bathroom and close the door, the door brushes up against your bump.
When you involuntarily grunt while trying to 'gracefully' get yourself up and off the obstetricians exam table thingy without slipping off the plastic stuff, missing the tiny footstool and landing straight onto the floor on your butt!! :rofl:
(I didn't actually fall but it was a stressful and embarrassing situation that I hope is a one off!).
when you cant peel the veges at the kitchen bench anymore cos you cant reach it as your bump is too big and pushes you too far out, killing your back - i just had to peel my veges sitting at the kitchen table cos of this.
These are great!!
When you shave your legs & bikini line with your eyes closed, it makes no difference if they are open anyway!!
I just bought the hottest pair of sandals in the sales.. and I can only wear them when DH is around 'cause I cant do the bloody things up!!! :doh:
i have to agree with everything said
i keep under estimating my size, and both my belly & butt end up knocking into door frames, other cars in the car park, people on the bus.......etc.........
another thing iv found is my dog can no longer sit on my lap, because there is no lap left for him to have!
This tread has been a good laugh...I am definately the crumbs lady in/on my shirt and every where else. LOL nice to see everyone is going through the same thing!
You know you are heavily pregnant when
-You need a 5 minute break from getting INTO the car and then another 5 minutes breather once Dh has adjusted the seat so I can drive.
- You really wish you could use and try to use Jedi mind force to bring stuff to you hoping it will actually happen
-When you groan every time you move off something ( a chair, couch, bed)
- You need to wait for Dh to get home from work so he can get the wok from the top shelf as you can't reach it and you certainly can't climb onto the counter to get it either!
- when it becomes harder to fold clothes as you can't use your belly the same way you used to use your laps and bending down to do so on the counter or bed just takes forever and you actually give up on folding bed sheets by yourself altogether..they look nice in rolled up in a ball in the linen cupboard!
-when your DH comments EVERYDAY to everyone on how huge you are in the nicest way possible! LOL
-When you dress yourself in a nice frock and a pair of walking velcro sandals to go out on NYE as they are the ONLY pair of shoes that
A) fits
B) doesn't make your cankles grow the size of pumpkin
C)do I REALLY care, they're comfy?
Keep em' coming ladies!
Mxx
this is soo funny,
you know your heavily pregnant when:
- you are thankful you have power steering as my belly rests on the bottom of the steering wheel .
- you have to use both hands to hold your belly just to roll over in bed.
- bringing everything you need to the coffee table so you dont have to get up from the couch anytime soon. And then finally getting comfy and having to pee grrr.
- thankful to have a 7yr help look after the 2yr cos you are just too tired to move.
-not being able to wash up without getting the belly wet.
-almost passing out when you have to bend over only slightly.
- having the belly so heavy and low that on occassion when you get up from the toilet the seat and have to lean forward it will come up a little bit.
- its easier to put the skirt on via the head instead of stepping into it.
- you feel like a penguin when walking at the shops i have a very good waddle going on.
- you have man legs (hairy) but not caring as its too hard to shave.
- belly is so big that there is no way of sitting down very lady like - legs wide apart and belly on the chair.
-when lying on the couch instead of trying to sit up you just roll off it and use the coffee table to get upright all awhile grunting with effort.
:rofl: That happened to me last night!:
The only other one I have to add is when you sneeze and it hurts so much you clutch you belly and say "OW" and your DH/DP/coworker looks alarmed and says "Was that a contraction????"
when you have to use the disabled toilet, because you cann't go in a normal public toilet AND shut the door.
hmmm, I'm begining to remember all the fabulous things I have to look forward to.
:rofl:
How about when your darling sister has to pick you up off the floor in IGA coz you were silly enough to get down there to look at shampoo!!
when you get weird sunburn on your thighs from sitting in the water at the beach. You spend hours wondering why you only rubbed in the suncreen THERE, then realise when you get home it is the shape of your belly and it's the HUGE shadow it cast. :redface:
Sorry Nelly....you made me LOLin a big way!
when you realise you have to admit that you can't squeeze through that gap no matter how hard you suck your stomach in. (this is after you have sent a colleague flying on their chair, coz you were so sure you'd make it this time!)
heh, thease are making me laugh!
my lastest ones
-When you get a drink (well...for me a slurpee) and try to rest it between your knees to drive...and find that it will not fit, at all...even when you try to compress the sides!
-when sitting at the computer desk strait on isnt an option, at all.
- when cooking tea you have to check that your apron isnt getting too hot and making sure all pot handles arent pointing outwards..
-When the idea of sitting on the floor to play with your cats makes you tired.
when you're constantly eating toddler sized meals... with a side of tums.
myson - not just that but your DH asks if tums have asked you to buy shares in them cus you eat that meany of them!
For me it is needing to move the seat back to get out of the car :rolleyes:
:rofl: this is great!
- when your cat attempts to get on your lap, sneers at the last 2 cm available & storms off in disgust
- when your MIL says you look like you're about to deliver (at 34 weeks!!!)
- when you keep forgetting that turning sideways to walk through small gaps SO doesn't work
- after dropping anything, you stand there looking around hopefully and say "oops" loudly - it worked every time!
- when Rennies are THE most important thing on the shopping list
- having your 6 year old nephew ask (three months AFTER giving birth) why I tie my sneaker laces on the very very inside of the shoe! After I stopped laughing, I explained that I'd gotten in the habit when I was PG cos it was the only way I could get them done up! Clearly I've forgotten what it is to be normal!
- still having a pillow fortress even though I'm not PG anymore, cos it's just so darn comfy!
what are tums??
They're for heartburn.
ohhh! I had no idea
Thanks!
Great thread ladies, givin me a good laugh. I can relate to so many.
~ When you have to stand side on to the registerdrawer when open at work cause there's not enough room to stand normally.
~When you realise you can no longer cross your legs comfortably without hitting the belly.
~ When you wear basically every meal.
~When your bellybutton has almost dissapeared cause it's soooo stretched.
~ When you can use the top of your tummy as a stabletable.
~ When you catch your image in a shop window & freak out cause you look so darn huge.
...when it takes 10 minutes of grunting, huffing and wriggling to settle yourself in bed only to realize that you need to pee again...
-when you have a bump pillow and NO other pillow can support the bump they way it does! (its a normal old lumpy pillow...)
-when your lovely DH tells you "you can fit though that gap" and you end up with what looks like a tyre print accross your belly.
When you need to sit on the bed, toilet etc just to put your underwear/pants/shorts on!!!!
Oooh Brianna, I started doing that just the other day!!
When you turn up for work and in the space of less than 10 minutes, at least 5 people that you come across on your way to your office ask "when are you due?"
When none of your maternity clothes fit anymore, even thought they used to be HUGE!!!
When your feet, ankles and calves manage to double in size by 3pm.
When your brain is so fried that you do a shopping trip at coles and then get the checkout and realise you forgot your wallet!
I don't think I register as "heavily" pregnant yet but here goes:
- When a man sitting next to you on the bus moves his knees an inch for you to get out and it is obviously not enough room, you want to thrash him. I'm pregnant, not just fat, damn you! The belly is solid, it's not going to fit through that gap! And it hurts when I squeeze it through!
- You get up 5 times a night to wee and must remind yourself to wake up FULLY to go, otherwise you will wet yourself.
- You throw a massive tantrum at the portracot becuase you don't understand the instructions on how to fold it out.
- There is no extra pillow/leg pillow/belly pillow on this earth that can make you comfortable in bed
:ROFL: I can relate to so many of these !
My most embarassing "huge" moment was when i decided that i would like to go swimming so i went with 2 friends (luckily).
I got into the lap pool with my kickboard and off i went. When i had decided that i'd had enough i made my way over to the ladder to get out and i couldnt !
I was so heavy that i physically couldnt pull my own weight up out of the water - not for lack of trying !
I was so embarassed - i had to call my friends over and 1 pulled from out of the water and the other pushed my bum from in the water and with a great deal of effort i made it out of the pool ! My beached whale experience !
Needless to say - i didnt go swimming again.
I did enjoy it at the time though - floating around was lovely !
... you consider taking a nap in the pool ... cos at least you have the comfortable weightless feeling AND your not feeling the heat.
When you don't have a bath at home and would sell your soul for a nice, long soak.
When your DF gets nervous about going to work everynight and then gets home everymorning and asks if theres a baby yet.
When you spend hours on pregnancy forums to see if anyone else is as uncomfortable as you are.
Far out, I am relating to a quite a few of these
*when putting your knickers on is a struggle
*when doing your shoes up becomes a victory
*when painting your toe nails takes 1 hour - LOL going for pedicure next time!!
*when you raise your work desk so it sits between your boobs and belly so you can get close enough to use your computer - LMAO, my work mates think this is hilarious!!
hahaha lots of funnies (because i can relate)
- when you make lasagna and *forget* to put the lasagna sheets in the darn thing. Thus creating meat and cheese pie..... i bawled for hours over this.
- when you touch your stomach at work cos bubs is moving around and workmates say 'you're not going into labour are you' with a scared look on their face :lol:
- when even applying mascara makes you out of breath!
- you wear the same 2 outfits day in day out - trying hard to mix and match but they're the only things that actually fit you and you can't be arsed going shopping for other clothes.
- when you have to ask DP to shave you cos you haven't seen that area for months! :redface:
When rolling over in bed is absolute torture in your pelvis and hips, takes a full 3 mins to achieve, involves lots of sound effects such as grunting and leaves you puffing for breath and your partner making wise cracks about needing to hire a crane :rofl:
My DH is a truckie, and everytime without fail after a trip away the first thing i get is "holy crap babe did u get bigger"
when DH has to lean over to kiss you.
ok so i made DH "cough" shave me "cough"
when the kids laugh at you coz u cant bend down to kiss them goodnight.
when u go to get ur child from school and u hear "not long now hey" from everysingle passer by, and all the school kids are whispering.
- When nosy ladies in shops ask you "how long to go now dear?" and upon hearing "2 more weeks" look slightly shocked and say "I dont think you're going to make it!"
- When your Obs tells you that he has theatre tickets for Sunday so would prefer if you didn't go into labour then! :)
- When you have a whole weekend to do anything you want to do, might be your last weekend baby free but the idea of getting out of comfy pjs and finding something to wear is too daunting to contemplate!
- Your husband / partner checks in from work morning, noon and night to make sure baby isn't making a grand entrance without him!
- When a grape that you have dropped rolls under the couch, you think, I'll get that next time...:redface:
-When you wake up starving at 5am and must, must, must have breakfast immediately otherwise you will waste away..then you eat 2 bowls of cereal and wander back to bed for another hour or 2 sleep
:( If only that was only when Heavily pg :(:
When no one complains that your house is a mess, and tells you off if you start to tidy when they are there!!
When your boss mentions the need to cut an arch out of the desk so that I can move closer to the computer!