Are school events becoming family events?

[Astrid]

A bit of a disastrous day at school athletics has really got me thinking whether families are taking over school events.

There was a bit of a disaster with small child and milk down my back, which has got me mulling over numerous things. Like

• Why was I there, if I was not there, it would not have happened.
• Why was a small child there and why were so many family members there. If the child was not there it would not have happened etc
• Why was the carpark overflowing 50+ cars when it is a small school (100 odd students, so 50 odd families)
• Why was the shaded area full (where the kids sit and eat) when most of the kids were on the oval.

Well, I was there, not because I wanted to be. There is a certain amount of expectation to be involved. I was just going up in my lunch break to check in.
No idea why most of the parents/grandparents/siblings were there. Only a small amount where actually helping (canteen, timekeeping, walking little ones to the toilet etc)

I find when I am at school events DD1 gets all clinging and whingy, she wants to be with us, not her school friends. To me, us being there affects her participation. She is old enough to get herself to and from the toilet, and ask for what she wants from the canteen. I wonder if it is the same for some others kids, their parents or another family member being there affected their participation adversely.

Does so many family members being there take away from it being a school event, does it just become a family event? Many families were eating lunch together, as opposed to the kids eating lunch in their house groups, which was meant to be a bonding exercise for the students).

Talking to another mum who has been involved in some other schools, she said some schools don't allow siblings etc events.

What are your thoughts? I really don't know, I just know I felt so overwhelmed and confused at the event today due to the sheet number of family members (and this was before the milk incident).

[Cally]

Sounds like a bit of chaos.

I would expect that parents come to support their kids in their races and help out. But I would expect the children to be with their class/house groups when they're not participating. If kids are old enough for school, they should be able to get themselves to the toilet.

But smaller siblings - they may be in the way, but why should those parents miss out on seeing an older child because they may not be able to get care for the younger one? Is that what you were meaning?

[Astrid]

But smaller siblings - they may be in the way, but why should those parents miss out on seeing an older child because they may not be able to get care for the younger one? Is that what you were meaning?

Not meaning anything. I have a huge amount of thoughts in my head about the whole thing, some in conflict with each other, that is why I posted.

I see both sides of the bringing or not bringing younger siblings. I prefer not to take DD2 and it has just been fortunate for me that childcare and athletics day have been on the same day. I know my family situation and know that it is hard to support DD1 or help out with DD2 around.

[Heaven]

I'm not sure about what it's like these days. But I think it's nice that family come. When I was little my Mum always came. Not everyone's did and the other kids would be hanging around her too showing her what they'd done and asking if she'd seen them do their events. I always enjoyed having her there cheering me on.

[black_rose]

My mum was one who didn't go so I want to if I can, but for me I would need to bring her brother and sister to be able to attend. But if I thought it might effect her performance or behaviour I may not go, don't think I would invite grandparents though. When I had school sports days we always had to sit in our houses not with family.

[Astrid]

I suppose my ponderings are, when does it cross the line from being nice to have family there, to it becoming a family fun day?

I am wondering if some of the issue today was that they were not enforcing the lunch in house groups, it was meant to work like that, but clearly was not.

[Floweryfields]

I love sports days - when I was a child the oval would be filled with families cheering children on. I often look out on the oval (I work across from it) on sports day and feel sad for the lack of participation these days.
I personally would not have issue with younger siblings being at such an event, or even grandparents, I think that's what these days are all about.

[Astrid]

I think that was what was lacking today. The cheering and encouragement whilst the students competed. It was more like a social picnic.

[Floweryfields]

Sounds like it could be more poor management on the schools part than anything.

[Novella]

My dd's school encourage it to be a family even, there are about 70 students and they included a teacher parent relay and a race for preschoolers. Kids were encouraged to eat with families at lunch or sit with their friends. The volunteers did some work but the school arranged for the Local Lions club to cook the BBQ (school supplied the food)

I think making these things family events is great and create a sense of community done well but if poorly organised I can understand how it could quickly turn to chaos

[Teeki]

One of my fondest memories is of my mum running alongside me in the sack race cheering me on and almost knocking over other people. That's so out of character for her (very placid person, antithesis of the 'pushy parent) that it's comical. It was also the only athletic event I ever won so I peaked at five

So yep, I'm all for family going to sports days and for younger siblings going (I'll have to take DD2). Agree with others about it being poorly organised.

I have similar memories. But I sucked at sack race lol. I fell over and was coming last. I was going to give up, but when I looked up there was Dad at the finish line, telling me I could do it and cheering me on. Even though I cried and came dead last, and sucked the whole way, he was there to give me a hug and tell me he was proud and I'd done a good job. It made me so glad I didn't give up, and I was only 5.

Later that year we had cross country, and when we came out of the woods part onto the oval, I was running with a friend when I saw Mum and Dad. Of course I stopped to say hello! My friend kept going and another went past, meanwhile Mum & Dad were screaming for me to keep going lol. Turns out my friend and I had been winning but stopping meant I came third lol.

I also remember having my grandparents come to watch sports days, and even though I'd only go see family quickly between events it felt great that they were all there for me. One of the best memories is when they'd do the last team events, the tunnel ball in a circle game with teachers versus parents versus last years seniors. Dad always went in it and I was always so proud of him

To be honest if sports day wasn't a family day I wouldn't have enjoyed it nearly as much!