12 Years Before
I'll probably mention aspects of later chapters so if you haven't read the whole book you might want to skip this post.

9.At one point during Peter’s bullying, Lacy is encouraged by an elementary school teacher to force Peter to stand up for himself. She threatens to cancel his playdates with Josie if he doesn’t fight back. How did you feel, when you read that scene? Do you blame Lacy for Peter’s future actions because of it? Do you agree or disagree with the idea that it a parent’s job to teach a child the skills necessary to defend himself?
I just thought I might start by addressing this question because it was one of the passages that I found to be the most shocking.
I found the concept that it was Peter's responsibilty to stop the bullying by fighting back abhorrent. To me it's basically blaming the victim and by going along with it Lacy became complicit in the bullying of her son. In particular it struck me that she merely gave him an order without giving him the tools to carry it out. She failed to provide him with words that he could use or physical skills. I think that Lacy didn't do enough, she could have enrolled Peter in martial arts and been more proactive in pushing the school to find solutions. To a certain extent one could argue that she allowed the teacher to bully her. Any school that responds to bullying by saying that the victims need to fight back more is failing thier students. There are many programs that are effective in reducing school bullying, placing responsibilty upon the victim to prevent the bullying without support doesn't play a part in any of them
Of course, it's kind of ironic that Peter's legal defence also rested on the concept of blaming the victims.
Of course I don't blame Lacy for Peter's future actions, no-one has a crystal ball and it's impossible to trace everything back to this one point however I think at this point Lacy's relationship with Peter was terribley damaged. For a little boy being told that his mother would punish him for being bullied when he had no means to prevent it would be heartbreaking and cause a great deal of his trust to vanish.

I think that parents do play a role in equipping thier children with the means to prevent bullying but schools also have to accept that they need to be pro-active in reducing bullying. It's one of those areas where the community needs to work together rather than trying to do that thing where it's someone else's responsibility.