DS has always been like that. Serious attachment issues. People we spend time with every day he rarely talks to. Maybe one word answers, but will never ask for anything, or start a conversation. My parents he is ok with, but no one else. He's getting there at school & gets involved with group tasks, answering questions, etc, but won't actually interact with adults one on one. Ever.

Even as a young toddler, if a friend picked him up, he'd freeze, & panic. Only myself, ex, my parents & ex's younger sister were allowed that close.

I do worry about ex, but only to a point. Only that he would possibly go over the top with reaction or punishment for wetting the bed, or having an accident. Which may have had a lasting affect. His kids are not a priority & he wouldn't think twice about what his words could do.

The reason I don't ask the kids details etc, is because if dad says the wrong thing IMO, it may be just that, my opinion. It may mean nothing at all to the kids, or it might mean a lot. If it was over their heads & I bring it up, they may start thinking about it & reading more into it, so I tend to leave things alone unless they want to talk to me.

ETA - will clear my inbox