PLEASE HELP I think DD8 has some sort of eating disorder

[sirenz]

could I suggest to you that perhaps it could be a fear of choking?

I suffered this condition for many years (along with other anxiety) and I would only eat soft foods and foods i was familiar with and I would NEVER eat when I was by myself. I ended up losing weight and got down to 42kg. After seeking help from my dr, I was placed on medication and I have since recovered from this condition.

This seemed to develop for me after my grandfather passed away (I took it pretty hard as he meant alot to me) and as you suggested it seemed to start for your dd after the birth of your angel ds.

Can you get a second opinion or maybe ask your dd if she is scared of choking? It is a very sensitive issue and can be embarrasing to talk about with someone. I know i felt really stupid the first time I mentioned it to the dr.

good luck. Let us know how you go.

[Rosie's Mum]

Hey,

I hope to this makes you feel better, as a child I gagged a lot on my food. To this day my parents think I was pretending but I wasn't. It happened when I didn't like the texture of something; chewy meat, sloppy vegies. It still happens but very rarely. I was a terrible eater, very picky and the thing my parents could never understand was that I didn't get hungry very often. Especially if I was excited or having fun.

Good news, I grew out out of it, I eat everything now! I have a very healthy diet and no food issues. It could be something else but if she's anything like me she's trying to force to food down to make you happy or not get into trouble. And if she's got a mental block that the food is yucky, her body just reacts in a gag reflex.

I really hope that helps, I can imagine how worried you are but maybe she will grow out of it X

[Schmickers]

I agree with speech pathology, and I would get a referral to a good paediatrician (ask around and see if there is anyone near you who is good with children with eating disorders) and get her assessed.

[Lulu]

Awesome advice here!

The only thing I can offer is my own experience - although not exactly the same, I did (and still do) have a problem with different sensations in my mouth.

I can't hack tomato - oh CRAP, it's so wrong. Hard on the outside (to me) and so squishy on the inside...bluuuerrgh. I grow tomatoes and make a killer sauce but can't actually eat them.

It took me till nearly 25 to try to so something about it, and all the while everyone was on my back about being picky, or too skinny or whatever...and that just made it worse because I felt like all eyes were on me everytime I ate.

It might very well be a gagging thing by the looks of it - have you talked to her about exactly what is going on for her? Could you give her a list of things to choose from like -

I'm scared I will choke
It tastes funny (sensations etc) or
It makes me feel.....

I dunno, I'm no expert I hope you get some answers xoxoxo

[Yael]

If you ever travel up here, i can recommend a great paediatrician and paediatric dieitician (they also have childrens psychologist working in the same office) in Camberwell.

[~StarBright~]

I was going to mention the choking thing as well...

When i was about two i ate a shoe buckle.. apparently i thought it was chocolate i didnt choke exactly- but i imagine that it didnt go down easily- and i have (and still am) a shocking eater. I chew and chew and chew and chew bacically until there is nothing there to swallow- i am EXTREAMLY picky with what i eat. I was always the last one at the dinner table and by the time i would get through my dinner it was cold and i wouldnt want to eat it anyway- whatever it was. I have found that i am more of a "grazer' too if that helps. i eat smaller meals, but more of them!

I dont know who you should see- i still havent really "fixed" my problem aside from awareness. i am still not a good eater- but now i at least try.

I hope you are able to get her to eat more soon.

[Sammiejane]

HI Dianne, How are things going with your daughter?

[BabyQ]

Could you give her a list of things to choose from like -

I'm scared I will choke
It tastes funny (sensations etc) or
It makes me feel.....

I dunno, I'm no expert I hope you get some answers xoxoxo

Gave me an idea. It may be easier for her to express what's bothering her if it's written down. You know how sometimes what you want to say is right there in your head but actually SAYING it out loud would just be too much to bear? Or maybe she doesn't know how to verbalize it, and would identify with something if it's already in words for her.

I would get some index cards and write some statements as to how you think she may be feeling...and using some ideas that have been suggested in this forum.

Give her freedom to choose as many or as few as she likes. Try to not make a big deal of the activity cause she might feel pressure. Though it would be ideal for you to be able to stay in the room while she does this (to assess her body language...see if she glances at a particular card many times before she chooses, if she chooses at all), she might be more honest with herself if noone is "waiting" ...(is there a place you can watch from and she won't know you're there?)

Some phrases could include what lulu has already said..

I'm scared I will choke
It tastes funny (sensations etc)
It hurts my mouth
It hurts my throat
The taste reminds me of something I don't like
The smell reminds me of something I don't like
I start worrying when I eat some things
I might get fat
Someone at school would tease me if I ate xxx

..just some ideas..you're in the best position to put your best guesses down on paper for her ...(so she's not faced with a MILLION statements to be overwhelmed with..or get ideas from iykwim...)
GL

[sirenz]

just wanted to wish you luck at the dr's. Hope you find the answers you are looking for.