thank you so much for your replies.
yes i have thought about counselling for myself. at first i wasnt going to....but i am having a hard time dealing with some apsects. the major one being how to get over the worry of his gf being around when my kids are with him. im so afraid they will like her more and i will become ***** mum. and i hate thinking about them playing happy families when i am the mum. i know he is their dad, but in my mind at the moment she doesnt have any right to my kids. if that makes any sense...