how can fathers be so heartless?

[widdly]

So, Arch hasn't seen his father for a week, he finally sees him and spends the day with him, and wants to spend the night with him desperately, but NO, his father is too busy drinking with his mate, he refuses to let Archie stay the night. Archie was ready for bed any way, all he had to do was put him in bed, but NO, too freakin selfish. Archie was beside himself.

I felt so bad for Arch, how can a father just not give a *****

So, Arch is staying with his father for 2 nights starting tomorrow. I have XH computer and wireless internet atm, I am going to be evil and take it home with me and then forget to give it back on wednesday Suck that! He will be lost without the internet, darn selfish pr!ck, GGRRRRRRRR!!!!

[*Elle*]

naawww poor little man, thats so awful, I agree I dont know how his father could be so heartless, that was a really unfair thing to do to his son, I wouldnt give back his net etc either LOL

[Lulu]

He is punishing you.

Don't let it get to you (it's a CRAPOLA thing to do though), don't get on his back about it so he knows it doesn't work.
Protect Archie, tell him daddy was tired and then go stick pins in all the pics of exH.....

[widdly]

thanks guys

lu, thanks for the advice, he is such a ****! Archie actually said to me through his tears, "I just want my daddy to love me". It just ripped through my heart

[Lulu]

daddy does love you *make all the excuses in the world and look like you mean it*

A GF said that to me once - 'wait till he realises you aren't coming back then watch how much he f**cks the kids around". And it was true. So I didn't let it get to us both and exH came right around realising he was missing her - nothing to do with me and me leaving.

If you can - try to draw in the greatest MUMMYness you have in you, and that is to protect your baby. This actually means that you will have to go against what you feel like doing (smacking the tool over the head).
When you talk to him about Archie - pump him up about how important his is as a father, how Archie thinks he is the greatest and how he looks forward to seeing him, how he wants ONLY daddy to do certain things etc etc etc.

This must be done without guilt tripping (even though the **** deserves it), give him confidence, let him know NO ONE can replace him and he is one little boys HERO.

Cos then he will be.

xoxoxo

[Floweryfields]

TBH if ex was drinking with his mate, I don't think it would've been the best environment to leave your son with him anyway, even if he was going straight to bed. It stinks that he isn't more responsible, but some me just are....

[rfm08]

thanks guys

"I just want my daddy to love me". It just ripped through my heart

Your heart wasnt the only one ripped through,,,i read that just then...your poor little man, a child should never have to say that big hugs to you and your boy

[widdly]

thanks lulu, that is exactly what I have been doing as hard as it is. I make sure Archie is never around when I talk about XH. I know what it was like for me when Mum left Dad, he was awful always calling her names to us and it really had an awful effect on my childhood, I dont want that for Arch. I realise that all I can do is be the absolute best Mum I can be and hope like heck that XH decides to be a decent Father.

ausgirl, I agree, I would never leave him with a drunken Father, but he is staying at my Uncle's house so I knew my Aunt was there anyway so he would have ben perfectly safe and looked after.

rfm, thanks hun x

Maybe I shouldn't have, but I sent him a text last night telling him what Archie said about loveing him, I thought he needed to know the effect he is having on his baby boy.