it really depends where you live

i don't own a home (or part-own) and i cannot get public housing, the list is 20 years long. so i'm staying in a dead r'ship, purely cos i can't organise any other housing.

i would not raise her hopes about public housing, just present it as an option to look at, not to rely on. I was devastated when i found out about the waiting list being so long.

Smiles4U - i think transport is a big one. I would imagine going shopping, and hauling the groceries home would be a big thing for her each week. Either, watching the kids so she can go herself, or taking them in your car, so she doesn't have to cart the groceries? i dunno, it would mean you would need two extra carseats in YOUR car too.

Has she got her twins in childcare at all? She's going to need all the support she can get, and having even ONE childfree day, will allow her to go to appointments, organise the moving, without the stress of the kids being bored in offices.

If she hasn't left yet, i would be getting paperwork into order, special irreplacable things into order e.g photos and keepsakes, and anything that the twins esp need, so that is things turn nasty in a hurry, and she HAS to leave in a rush, those things will be ready to grab. (in a situation with an x who drinks, i would be prepared for anything).

but really, the best thing for her, from you? she's already got it, YOU CARE and YOU LISTEN. friendship is something you just can't buy.