thread: I'm going to be a single mum....

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  1. #1
    Registered User

    Sep 2007
    Melbourne
    506

    I'm going to be a single mum....

    As of midnight last night i am officially single and 2 days overdue with my now ex's baby... I cant stop crying and getting all emotional, i have no where else to go so i have to stay here with him. He says he's been living a lie for the last 10months or so and only stayed with me for Lyla... I'm just so hurt and i cant handle being around him and not being able to have him if that makes sense... I still love him soooooo much.

    I'm terrified of being a single mum i just dont know what to do.......

  2. #2
    BellyBelly Member

    Oct 2004
    Cairns QLD
    5,471

    Aw hugs Jess, that is such crappy timing. Is it possible that he is feeling this way because he is scared? Is there any chance that after the Lyla has arrived & you guys a re settled that you may be able to sek some counselling & patch things up?
    Can he move out? You shouldn't have to be the one that has to leave given your current state. Also with a new baby what does he want you to do? Thats a bit rough.
    maybe contact your hospital & ask to speak with the social worker there. They should be able help & support you.

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Feb 2004
    Adelaide SA
    498

    Oh sweetie i'm so sorry.
    Is there no family or friends you can stay with until your on your feet?

    Huge to you hun

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    By the beach (Melbourne)
    149



    Jessey, I'm so sorry that you're going through this now, when it should be such a happy and exciting time.

    My only advice, difficult as it sounds, is to focus all of your love and attention on your precious baby. Regardless of where your r'ship is and what's happening, your baby will arrive soon. Any other details can be sorted out later.

    Obviously you're hurting right now and that's totally ok and understandable. I'm sure your heart and mind are racing, and you're frantically trying to understand what has happened and maybe why your partner has acted this way. But your love and energy are better spent on your baby right now.

    Do you have any friends or family anywhere nearby? Someone to call?

    xo

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Jan 2007
    7,197

    Oh sweety what an awful time for this to happen. Sounds like he is scared too but that is no excuse. Find people around you that can support you hun, particularly over the next few weeks once Lyla arrives. Do you have family or friends you can stay with? You will also find heaps of support on here from all the gorgeous girls who are single or not. Good luck with it all.

  6. #6
    Lucy in the sky with diamonds.

    Jan 2005
    Funky Town, Vic
    7,070

    He is an A HOLE, tell him to move out.

    I'm so sorry this has happend to you hun.
    Last edited by Lulu; May 3rd, 2008 at 02:38 PM.

  7. #7
    BellyBelly Member

    Oct 2004
    Cairns QLD
    5,471

    I am sure its just fear. Its a very stressful time for both of you & he obvioulsy has doubts about become a father so lets blame not being in love. Hasn't been in love for the past 10 months. So 9 months ago when you fell pregnant, what was that? just a bit of fun to him? Na, I think he is just scared & reacting badily.

  8. #8
    BellyBelly Member

    Feb 2007
    On the beautiful Gold Coast!
    1,930

    I just wanted to wish you luck over the coming months. I hope he snaps out of it & realises he's just scared.
    If it turns out he really doesn't want to be with you then it's best not to try to force the relationship to survive.
    Please contact some relatives or good friends who can be there for you over the coming days/weeks etc as you will really need the support if you don't have it from your ex.
    If you need to be a single Mum I'm sure you will do a wonderful job. Try not to stress too much (impossible I know!) & think about your beautiful baby who will be in your arms any day now, she will need you more than you've ever been needed in your life.
    I believe once you look into her eyes you will know everything will be ok.
    Sending a big hug & I hope things start to look up for you soon. The timing just couldn't be worse!

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Apr 2008
    Melbourne
    33

    Hi Jessey,

    How are things now? Maybe you have had the baby? I know you might be feeling very lonely and scared. There is support out there if you need it, you just need to ask. I am also in my third trimester and my partner and I have had the talk that we are not in love and are only together for the baby. We live together and I also feel as though I have nowhere else to go. I know, it can be really hard. You want him there but you don't. See how you feel once bub is here. The dynamics of a relationship can change dramatically when a bub enters. Or so I have read. Good luck! Thinking of yoU!

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Apr 2009
    1

    what would you do.

    Hi There,

    I'm so sorry Jesse this man has done this to you, you must feel so hurt and you have to keep it together for your bubba, i really feel for you hun xxxx

    I have a 9 week old little girl, i live with the father but we are not married.

    He is a very strong character and doesn't do any housework, cleaning, washing, cooking, shopping he thinks because he works and pays for things i should do all theses things. At weekends he watches sport all day while i cook food for him and do chores.

    I am a insecure person and worry about things so i am a worrier and think that he doesn't like me that much and is looking for a better partner.

    When we argue he says i'm the worst girlfriend he's ever had, although he has only had short relationships ( we have been together 3 and a half years).
    H tells me he's looking for someone better and that he wants to sleep with other girls ( he hasn't yet as far as i know).

    He tells me i'm stupid and when i speak i talk rubbish. He's says he doesn't want me there but then the next day i'm the best thing ever or he can't live without me.

    Do you think i should leave this man because i feel as if he hates me .

    LOL Kat

  11. #11
    belinda_76 Guest

    hi

    hi congrats on ur beautiful little girl, im from the gold coast r u looking for other single mums for freindship?

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