thankyou so much BellyBelly- i know i deserve better and that there is someone out there for me! i think im just scared of being or feeling alone. i dont want to waste my time wondering where he is for the rest of my life!

winter and rhyb- thanks for the squishy cuddles. :hugs: they really mean alot right now! i cant even talk to friends as we share mutural friends and i have been told NOT to call or talk to his mum or our friends! just to leave them alone!