IMO these 2 words, even though they aren't really swearing, are just the start of a huge list of words (more obvious words) that they are not allowed to say.
They aren't allowed to call each other idiot either.
Are there any words most people think are innocent that you don't allow your kids to say? I remember mum & dad banning us from dork...never thought that was fair! My kids have never heard the word though I don't think, lol.
Dork is the technical term for a whale's penis, so I can understand that one.
DS is allowed to say whatever I say: makes me watch my language! He sometimes comes home with the odd word/phrase from nursery I don't like (eg go away or shut up) and I tell him that's not nice. It's OK to ask for alone time and it's OK to ask someone to be quiet, so I have to work hard on modelling that (and not just screaming at DH and DS "stop touching me! Stop it! Further away! Go outside! I can't cope!" as I did last month).
I agree with not allowing those words. They are very disrespectful.
My son is only 2 but talks up a storm. He is not allowed to say "go away" as we tell him it's not very nice. My husband thinks it ok to use the word "crap" around him as he thinks it is not a swear word, but i do and will not let him use it.
He will not be allowed to use the word "retarded" in any context (ie that is so retarded)...........well ok he might be able to use it if he was saying something like "the growth of the plant was retarded by the lack of sunlight" but you know what I mean.
I understood dork when I got older, just didn't think it was fair as a kid when everyone around me was allowed to say it!
I don't really say stupid & shut up myself, but how my kids got through without saying some of the other things I say i really don't know I always made it clear that that they were grown up words only....its worked so far...not sure what that says about me though, lol.
They use silly, shoosh, not fair, annoying, lol. They do tell each other to go away, but I can't stop that with the way they annoy the crap outta each other. (Yes I say crap, they don't...)
Last edited by ~clover~; November 9th, 2009 at 07:04 AM.
Nope I dont let my kids use any of those words... even my 13 yr old!!!
It sounds awlful, and is extremely disrespectful. I dont speak to people that way, they dont speak to me that way, and i expect my kids to be the same.
Although at school... well.... how would you know, little buggers!!!
My kids know the diffence between "Not nice" words and "swear" words, and neither are ok here.
DD1 (3.5yrs) has started saying 'stupid' and we are trying to put a stop to it. I think she gets it from childcare. She is allowed to say 'silly' but not 'stupid'. We also don't allow 'shut-up'. She said it to me once and was in so much trouble. She is asked to say 'please be quiet' or 'shoosh please'.
I say shut up to DS too much, not necessarily in a horrible way, but I need to start saying be quiet instead...
I am happy for him to say dork, didn't realise it was a whales penis LOL I dont like idiot. I encourage silly instead of stupid too. We say fart and pop off, it doesn't wory me which DS uses.
DS knows what words are nice words and what words are rude words, sometimes he slips up, but I dont get too wrked up over it, they are only words after all.
We were never allowed to say 'hate' either, and I remember when my brothers used to play their battle games and they used to have to say "i dispatched you" instead of "I killed you".
Some things I think I'll carry from my parents is: shut up, go away, stupid, idiot. I think just basically words that put down others... But ANY word used as a put down is not on.
I don't really have a problem with fart LOL! Do they get in trouble at school for 'fart'?
No way. No words of disrespect at all. Not stupid, not shutup, not I hate you... I don't even let my kids talk to each other in a rude or nasty way to each other let alone to any adult. It's not on. We don't talk to them that way so they are not allowed either. If you want your kids to respect you, you need to show them you won't tolerate disrespect. Doesn't mean you demand respect (I don't believe in that either) but allowing certain behaviour IMO is like saying "You can treat me like crap". It's our job to teach them right from wrong and this is a BIG one that I am against.
for me, even though dd is only 19 months. I can't stand hearing kids say shut up its unnecessary. I know a 4 year old who says bugger and I HATE it. And I am not an anal parent kwim. I tolerate alot and am not really mega strict but there are a few things I just don't like. hearing a 4 year old say bugger is just like what the! I know she doesn't know what it means but still
Actually DH has a bit of a mouth on him, particularly when he is venting about work or on the phone. I keep saying 'you have to stop saying X before the baby comes!' He claims to not know which words are 'appropriate' so asked me to make him a list of 'no no words' (not just what he can't say, but what we don't want our children to say, or people to use around them).
the list is:
f***
s***
c***
stupid
bugger
dumb
b*tch
shutup
idiot
crap
damn
w*nker
any race-based words
I will have a bit of trouble with crap and stupid!
Last edited by Talia*L; November 9th, 2009 at 12:29 PM.
: EDA: w*nker!
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I always made it clear that that they were grown up words only....its worked so far...not sure what that says about me though, lol.
Although now that they're older I overlook it if it is said. A 13 yo boy saying pop off is a little strange 
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