Well after a loooong cycle I finally got a BFP during the week yet I am feeling pretty flat.
My last time i got a BFP ended up being a long drawn out chemical pregnancy with 2 surgeries, chemo drugs and months of recovery, while the BFP before that was a blighted ovum.
I am very hopeful but I feel that until I see a heartbeat I just can't believe it. I also am not having many symtoms at all so am a bit nervous.
We have not really told anyone yet (just the girl I work with and my boss) as I want to surprise people with great news after my first scan. I feel its going to be a long few weeks.
Am I nuts? I should be jumping for joy but until I see something real I just can't get excited
Its completely natural to feel the way you do. After my miscarriage i went on to have 2 chem pregnancies and when i got another BFP i refused to see a doctor until 6 weeks and didn't show any excitement until i saw my baby at 12 weeks.
sadly i think it's part and parcel of being a long termer or having been through a miscarriage/loss. the innocence is just gone from everything. we tend to live with apprehension rather than being able to embrace the happiness we would feel if we'd not been through so much to get to that point
try and embrace the fact you're pregnant, and not dwell on the negatives as much as possible. celebrate every little milestone.
I was the same with this IVF baby, we had a 10 weeks loss prior to the IVF cycle & I was just so uncertain that I couldn't be happy & excited until I knew that everything was ok. Even now at 37 weeks I'm still nervous that there could be something wrong.
Hang in there, as soon as you see that little heart flickering away some of the anxiety will disappear.
Totally understandable. I'm sorry you've had such a rough time but ....... Congrats on your BFP!!!
After trying for so long myself I was scared to get excited incase I had to start at square one again. Then I decided you know what if things don't work out it's going to hurt wether I'm excited or not - trying to trick my heart isn't going to work. So I embraced it as much as I could...but your so right I've never had a loss but seeing that beautiful heartbeat is the best thing ever!
Wishing you nothing but good vibes for you and your tiny babe. (If you wait until you see a heartbeat to really get excited that's alright... You have to do what you have to do. )
You are not nuts. It is perfectly normal to be protecting yourself in case of a worst case scenario. I know after my two first m/c that I told my DH whilst waiting for the u/s to be prepared for no heartbeat. I just couldn't feel connected or happy to be pg at that point in time. I took me really until my DD was born, when she started crying for me to feel ok.
Ahh the joys of LTTTC and LTTTCAMC/L I am not excited yet, and I am 15 weeks after a BFP on my first fresh transfer, after 2 mc's. I agree with the other girls that this is very very normal for people who have gone through what we have gone through. Congrats on your BFP. Stick little bubba stick!
I was exactly the same this time. After four losses one after the other, when the nurse from the FS called to say I had a BFP I think she was a little surprised at my very non-excited response. I was offered counselling because they knew how hard it would be for me to get through the early stages of the pregnancy. It wasn't until I went in for my scan at 7 weeks to check viability and we saw the heart beat that I realised how much I had been holding in - managed to get out of the clinic and then basically collapse against DH with so much emotion and relief.
I think its just self preservation to be honest. You've had a hard road and your body and mind are doing the best they can to protect you. I hope you have a beautiful sticky bubba on board, and time passes quickly so you get to see that reassuring heartbeat.
Thank you ladies for your support and understanding, it means a lot, I have my fingers crossed that this pregnancy continues and provides me with a wonderful healthy baby, thanks
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Just can't get excited ?!?!
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