OH MY GOSH!!! u poor woman!! if u were next to me id scoop u up and give u the biggest hug and cuddles!!
i am literally wiping tears away right now (p.s very rare for me).. i cant begin to explain how sorry i am but how grateful u got to have that 3 week time frame with ur lil baby...
i am so so so so sorry that u have gone through this and hope u have alot of support.. although through here u will be made to feel like ur everyones sister and friend...
the pain goes slowly but will take a while as u heal the pain will subside but it always hangs in there for those moments that count.. U have lost something so precious and so important to u and thats something that takes time... but if u ever ever need any shoulder to cry on or just too pour out too PM me ill always have u in my thoughts hun
Last edited by Rouge; September 20th, 2010 at 12:12 AM.
Sweetie, my heart goes out to you, I wish that I could take away your pain. I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious baby girl. I pray that the memories you have will stay warm in your heart forever.
Regards,
Dianne
Emmanuel born sleeping @24wks
Trisomy 13
Maisy, my heart absolutely goes out to you. I am so sorry for the loss of your precious daughter.
Although our stories are so different, I, like you am grateful that I got to spend time with my babies alive, when many others don't get that chance.. I am however still bitter and feel immensely ripped off that I had to say goodbye at all..
9weeks after the death of your little one is such a short amount of time.. In the early days of grief, for me each day I managed to function was a blessing (still is sometimes) but I can honestly say I was in shock for at least 4 months.. The pain of grief, well yes in my experience it does get easier.. It's different. I do not believe I will ever get over the death of Taite and Seth, but I have learnt to live with it.. I will admit though that sometimes I still have those days where the grief is too hard to bear and the reality of what has happened cripples me, but those days are few and far between.. It is a hard, horrible journey and it is painful that you can't do anything about it.. I will always have babies that died and sometimes that reality is hard to get your head around.. I have no idea if I have helped you at all or answered your question as I am only giving my experience.. Once again I am sorry you lost your precious baby xx
I'm so sorry to hear that you have had to experience such devastating heartbreak I don't know what it is like to walk the path you are walking now, but I hope that it does get easier for you to do it I would feel very honoured to be able to read about your DD when you are ready to share it.
Maisy - we're in a similar boat as you know, so I can't tell you if it gets easier. I do know a woman whose son was stillborn 40 years and she still aches for him. Unfortunately, as you say, this is the new normal.
It's been 8 weeks since my son Leo was born and died and it is all so raw. I feel robbed too. It isn't supposed to be like this. There are women here who can relate and I hope that helps you.
Do you mind me asking, what is your DD's name? I look forward to reading her story when you have the energy to post.
Thanks guys, it means a lot to hear nice comments and support. It is hard to talk about it a lot IRL. Don't get me wrong I have a lot of people who are caring and willing to listen but I feel like I dont want to burden people with it. And people are sympathetic but sometimes I feel like everyone has moved on now but I am stuck in a moment in time. I know the world still revolves and life goes on but when the chatter is about other things my mind keeps wandering back to Sophie and everything that happened during those 5 weeks. And in some ways sometimes I feel like I have nothing to contribute because all that is really on my mind or all that I really want to discuss is her but I dont want to repeat myself over and over either by going on about it.
The good and the bad days is something I have to learn to live with, but I just wish I didnt have to summon up so much strength in the process. Sigh.
It is hard too as she was a whole new person with a little personality and mannerisms, and someone that I will never get to know.
I'll try and cut down my account of what happened as it is way too long!
Don't feel you have to cut down her story - she made such a huge impact on your life in such a short time it would only be fitting if you included everything And use the forums as much as you can. Sometimes it is easier to write down words instead of speaking them
Sophie is such a beautiful name. I found too that all I wanted to do was talk about Emmanuel but it was hard for others to understand. This was when BB became my haven as I could talk all I wanted about Emmanuel and I was truly understood and supported. hun.
Regards,
Dianne
Emmanuel born sleeping @24wks
Trisomy 13
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