Feeling crappy tonight. I have felt edgy all day and I'm not sure why. Anyway, I am sitting here close to tears remembering my precious babies and thinking how ot has been almost 4 years since I held them in my arms .. This time, 4 years ago I was pregnant, feeling 2 babies kicking and moving inside me, only referred to by twin A and twin B and not knowing if they were boys or girls. I had no idea just what was about to happen. I had 2 tiny precious miracle boys for 12 days. They taught me so much in that 12 days. I felt a love I'd never felt before. My beautiful son's, I wish they were here.

When they died I never thought I'd smile again. I didn't know how the hell I was going to put one foot in front of the other. I did though and fast forward 3 years I birthed my Earthside Miracle. My DS, he's my everything. I look at him and wonder what the twins would be like.. Would they look like him? Would they look similar to each other? I think of them all interacting together. I see pics and I of DS and I imagine where they would be standing.. Anyway, this was the closest I could get to a pic of my 3 sons and I.. I love it and will treasure it always..

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Thanks for reading.. I feel better for sharing my feelings..