13yr old sister living with me

[Cass72]

I just wanted to say goodluck. Teenage girls are not easy to live with....DH's 14 year old daughter came to stay with us just before Christmas and some days are just ARGH!!!

I would sit down with her and give her some ground rules. First of all though, speak with your DH so you both have the same expectations. My stepdaughter started acting up something fierce (plus we found out that getting drunk and smoking pot at school were just a few of the mild things she got up to last year). I told her in no uncertain terms that I would not tolerate that sort of behaviour. I'm not a fan of the let it slide approach. I have a toddler in the house and I don't want him thinking that behaviour is acceptable.

If she's under 16 (and he is over 18) and they are having sex he is breaking the law by having sex with a minor. You may be flogging a dead horse with that one though so I agree that (sadly) reliable contraception is probably something you really need to think about. Maybe take her to a (female) GP who can talk to her about it so it doesn't sound like you are on her back.

You said you are a mum so, trust your instincts. I'm not sure how old your little ones are but sometimes teenage girls carry on just like a two year old. Think about how you would deal with their tantrums - probably not too different huh? Remember that it's not your fault that her mother passed away.

Getting them to start talking is hard but once the words start flowing it's worth the effort.

I took my stepdaughter out for the day and we went shopping looking for craft things. I also took her to the library to borrow some books. She's actually a joy when I've got her on her own.

Sorry it's a bit scrambled....good luck hun.

With regards to the clothes, we took DSS to Pumpkin Patch - they have a tween section. We were able to buy some very reasonably priced clothes that she needed (there was no way on this earth that I would let her out of the house in what she turned up in). I grabbed lots of things and got her to try them on. She grudgingly admitted she liked some things so we bought them. Just don't expect her to say thank you. I don't think my stepdaughter knows what it means.